Hello everyone!
Around 2 years ago we got a bunch of friends together and showed you the story of marcus.
"Goodness, it looks like someone is ready for battle."
At that time we had no clue as to who marcus actually is, but Blizzard liked the video
so much that not only did they come up with more stories, they even added marcus into
the game.
"Well, that was certainly unexpected."
Within Highmountain you can see the legend himself and the cool part is that since we
didn't know who marcus was, Khayllys designed her own Marcus and this one made it into the
game.
With Legion we now we have 1 new story with marcus and a couple brand new ones so I invite
you to dim the lights, sit back and enjoy the tales...
Let's start it of right with a steamy romance novel: Got Milk?
"So there I was, surrounded by at least a hundred murlocs!" the heavily-mustached man
proclaimed, gesturing in a wide arc.
The tawny tauren gasped in amazement.
"What ever did you do?"
Her voice had a brawny, muscular tone to it.
"The only thing I could do, my lovely."
Marcus patted the sword resting on his thigh.
"I brought them to justice!"
"Oh!
With just a dagger?
You are so brave!"
Tanda cautiously reached for the blade, but pulled her hand away at the last second.
Marcus bristled.
"What?
This is a two-handed sword, enchanted to the hilt.
Perhaps not as big as you've seen, but I know a few tricks to really make it sing."
Tanda smiled demurely, fluttering her enormous eyelashes.
She picked up a piece of cheese and held it close to Marcus's lips.
"Try this, it's homemade."
The handsome paladin stammered, "N-no.
I'm, um, lactose intolerant."
Tanda placed the cheese back in the bowl.
"Oh, are you sure?
Does that mean you can't tolerate me?"
The buxxom tauren stepped forward, pressing herself against Marcus.
The substantial height difference placed his face squarely in her chest.
Unable to see, he flailed in protest, finally finding purchase on her firm backside -- his
muffled apologetic sounds only made her giggle and squeeze him more tightly.
Just as his other hand found her tail, the light dimmed as an imposing figure moved into
the doorway.
"What the..."
Tanda exclaimed, "Bax, no!"
Marcus pulled his head away and gasped for air, looking at the angry tauren with wide
eyes.
"It's not what it looks like!"
Bax charged, ramming into Marcus while uttering his challenge, "You mess with the bull, you
get the horns!"
Marcus reeled and caught himself, digging his heel into the dirt.
Seizing a horn in each hand, he held the tauren's head down, fighting against his tremendous
strength.
Bax forced his head up, grunting and spitting in anger, only to have it repeatedly pushed
down.
They locked eyes for a moment, and with a final heave of explosive force, Bax wrenched
himself free.
The powerful tauren swung his arms out wide, as if to crush Marcus in a mighty hug.
"Blades of Light!" proclaimed the paladin.
A huge, pulsing sword thrust up from the ground between the two combatants, tearing through
armor and clothing, searing the thick chest hair of Marcus and cutting a fine line into
the tauren's muscular chest.
Before they could move again, Tanda raised her hooved leg into the air and brought it
down with warlike force.
The man and bull wobbled, clearly stunned.
"Stop it, both of you!"
Marcus regained his composure and looked at Tanda, and then to Bax.
Fur was ruffled and the bare parts of their leathery skin glistened with sweat.
As they all stared one another down, the ridiculously good-looking Marcus spoke.
"Well, since we're mostly undressed already..."
<The story goes on, but your good taste prevents you from reading it.>
Ahh good old marcus, no situation that he can't solve with his trusted enchanted 2
handed sword.
Who knows where his adventures will take him next, but his tales are known across all of
azeroth, yet not everyone is keen to admit that they actually read the steamy romance
novels.
A good example is professor Pallin, who offers training for mass milling but as we pick up
the book that's supposed us this technique, we discover a strange book that stands out.
It doesn't appear to be an inscription textbook at all...it's more of a... a steamy romance
novel.
Ow my professor Pallin, you delicious gnome, didn't know you had it in ya! but the good
professor says that he only reads it for the penmanship.
Such curvy "B's...and such ample "D's...
Ow yes it's all about the B's and D's alright but Pallin thinks we might benefit
from a penmanship lesson from none other than the author himself, B. Spearshaker found in
Ironforge or F. Serbacon, found within the library in the Undercity.
The famous writers have lost their passion though, they just can't get into the voice
of the character anymore.
Perhaps it's time to pass on the torch as they teach us how to write our very own steamy
romance novels.
We can let our mind wonder, use our experience in the field and create our own curvy B's
and ample D's.
Starting off with...
A Steamy Romance Novel: Elven Bondage: The weight of his fist crashed into the side
of the ogre's face with a meaty thunk.
The bulbous goon teetered for a moment like a marionette cut loose from its strings before
falling into a heap atop his unconscious sibling.
The drektooth brothers may have been feared throughout the land, but the courage of Sir
Crispin Greymane had won the day once again.
The brave hero had no time to pause and admire his handiwork...not when Lady Moonshade remained
shackled to the wall.
Greymane strode to her side, each step as graceful as a ram of Dun Morogh.
"You are unhurt, my lady?
I trust these brutes did not cause you harm."
She breathed a relieved sigh as he broke away the bonds that held wrists and ankles.
"Your swift arrival saw to that, noble champion," she answered.
The night elf's glowing eyes beamed upon him like stars on a cloudless night.
"The greatest suffering was enduring the ogres' lecherous glances.
My leather armor was damaged during my capture, and several pieces seem to have fallen away."
She made a halfhearted attempt to cover the bareness of her taut midriff.
"Of course a knight performing his duty would not notice such a quandary," he assured her,
taking her hand and lightly massaging her bruised wrist as she rose to her feet.
Standing her full height, Lady Moonshade was at least three heads taller than her savior,
if not more.
She puzzled at him a moment.
"Forgive me, good sir, but I cannot discern if you are the shortest human I have ever
met, or the tallest dwarf."
HIs white teeth flashed through the thickness of his beard like snowcaps on a mountain ridge.
"I like to think I'm the best of both, good lady."
He gestured toward the doorway.
"A spacious carriage awaits to convey you back home.
I assure you, my driver will not disturb us as I personally see to your recovery.
I will do my best to ensure the ride is to your liking."
A playful smile danced about her lips.
"I hope I can rely upon your driver's discretion.
I fear the rest of my fragile armor might fall away at any moment."
The ruggedly handsome knight bowed and flashed a confident wink.
"Why my dear, I'm positively counting on it!"
"Oh, Sir Greymane!" she swooned, falling into his arms.
He guided her toward the waiting coach, stepping over the unconscious ogres on the floor.
<The story continues for many more chapters, laden with vehicle metaphors.>
Heroic and dashingly charming, Sir Crispin Greymane saves the day once again and for
those wondering, I don't believe he's related to Genn Greymane.
The next tale takes us from riding a carriage to the open sea in A Steamy Romance Novel:
Waves of Desire:
Lord Gravesbane stared out through the porthole, watching the waves rise and fall in time with
the aching that tormented him inside.
How long had she kept him waiting here in the cabin of his luxury schoone?
He felt the keen edge of his desire growing more insistent, spurring his impatience.
At last the cabin door swung open.
She paused in the doorway, torchlight playing about the hem of her low=cut silken gown as
the shadows danced upon her pale sin'dorei skin.
"Am I late, my lord?" she asked, chewing on the fullness of her lower lip.
He found himself speechless as his jaw dropped to the floor.
He knelt to pick it up, rising as he snapped it back into place.
"Some things are worth waiting for, Lady Sunskin."
He held out his hand, beckoning her closer.
For a moment, a look of uncertainty crossed the highborne's brow, her shallow breaths
hung heavy with hesitation and longing.
She brushed her fingertips across the cold, pallid skin of his cheek," I hope your desiccation
doesn't hinder your enthusiasm, Lord Gravesbane."
He took her hand and kissed it with his one good lip.
"Fear not, darling.
My jaw isn't what it used to be, but my tongue remains as limber as ever."
"Oh, Lord Gravesbane!" she swooned, falling into his arms.
He relished the warmth of her skin as he guided her toward the leather harness hanging over
his bed.
<The story continues for many more chapters, laden with "porthole" puns>
I wonder if this is the same character from the first story who's met a terrible fate
and found himself turned into an undead.
It's possible that this is an entirely different character, but I like to believe that his
spirit could not find rest, not while there are still families to be brought closer together.
That tale is told within A Steamy Romance Novel: Nightborne of the Living Dead
She accepted the chalice of wine with a bat of her long lashes.
"I really shouldn't, Lord Gravesbane.
My mother would never approve."
"Nonsense, my dear Elonia," the nobleman answered.
"You are ten-thousand years old.
I'm sure your mother would forgive you for indulging just this once."
She giggled.
"it's not the wine, my lord.
Rather, it's the notion of a nightborne spending her evening in the company of someone so.."
"Charming?" he offered.
"I was going to say decrepit."
"My morals are not quite that far gone, I assure you," he replied, his good eye drifting
up and down the length of her flowing gown.
"I'm sure your mother would find me most endearing."
"Oh, would I?" asked a sharp voice.
Crispin Gravesbane turned to see another nightborne framed within the doorway.
Through her attire was less inviting than her daughter's, her face and body were a mirror
of Elonia's own.
He approached and bowed, hastily kicking aside the kneecap the clattered to the floor.
"I am Lord Crispin Gravesbane, at your service.
Do I have the honor of meeting Lady Marina?"
"You do," she answered coldly, casting a harsh glance toward Elonia.
"I fear you are toying with me, good lady," he smiled, careful to hold his jaw in place.
"Surely you must be Elonia's sister, not her mother."
A faint blush flashed across Lady Marina's cheeks.
"You flatter me, my lord."
Her voice softened.
"It has been centuries since anyone has mistaken us for siblings."
"Nonsense! he insisted, taking her hand and guiding her toward the couch.
He sat down between the two indigo-skinned elves.
"Perhaps after we share a bit of wine, we'll find out what else you and your daughter have
in common."
"Oh, Lord Gravesbane!"
Marina swooned.
She took Elonia's hand, sharing a furtive smile with her daughter.
"Perhaps it's time we introduced you to the true secrets of the shal'dorei."
<Subsequent pages seem to have been scribbled over in nightborne profanities.>
And there end the new steamy romance novels, perhaps for the best since I don't know
where we're going to go from here, but I can't wait to find out.
Hopefully we'll find more steamy romance novels available in the future, perhaps a
team up of marcus and gravesbane, add queen Azshara and the old god N'zoth to the mix...I'm
sure they could make for some interesting steamy adventures.
I want to give a big, big thank you to everyone who was kind enough to offer their time and
effort to bring these new stories to life.
This beautiful video has been created by the amazingly talented Khayllys who also made
the previous steamy romance video and provided her voice Elonia.
Check out her channel if you're interested in more machinima, I'd recommend either
the Tides of War video or The Story of Eva Sarkhoff.
Alex was kind enough to return as Marcus and his brother Loz was the deviously charming
lord Gravesbane.
You know them best as fatbosstv, your number 1 source for raid guides and running laps
around the city of Dalaran.
Koltrane provided his deep sexy voice for the Tauren Bax and you can find the man behind
it over on twitter @The_Koltrane Nixxiom was our ruggedly dwarvish friend Sir
Greymane and on his channel you can also find awesome machinima, but also discussion videos,
the true story of characters and recently his attempt to murder his friend little ben...
Silver Letomi was our seductive tauren Tanda and on her channel you can find some beautiful
and amazing parody songs similar too Sharms channel who provided the voice for not only
Lady Moonshade, but also Lady Sunskin and Lady Marina....
She's quite the lady herself so if you're looking for some new channels to watch, check
out all these amazing people since they're well worth your time.
And that's us done for today ladies and gentleman.
I'll leave you with an alternate take on the got milk story since Sharm did it in such
a way that we were actually wondering which voice to use so in the end why not just use
both.
Right then, as always thank you so very much for watching everyone!
Subscribe if you like my videos, leave a like if you enjoyed this one aaand until next time
guys...see ya!
Let's start it of right with a steamy romance novel: Got Milk?
"So there I was, surrounded by at least a hundred murlocs!" the heavily-mustached man
proclaimed, gesturing in a wide arc.
The tawny tauren gasped in amazement.
"What ever did you do?"
Her voice had a brawny, muscular tone to it.
"The only thing I could do, my lovely."
Marcus patted the sword resting on his thigh.
"I brought them to justice!"
"Oh!
With just a dagger?
You are so brave!"
Tanda cautiously reached for the blade, but pulled her hand away at the last second.
Marcus bristled.
"What?
This is a two-handed sword, enchanted to the hilt.
Perhaps not as big as you've seen, but I know a few tricks to really make it sing."
Tanda smiled demurely, fluttering her enormous eyelashes.
She picked up a piece of cheese and held it close to Marcus's lips.
"Try this, it's homemade."
The handsome paladin stammered, "N-no.
I'm, um, lactose intolerant."
Tanda placed the cheese back in the bowl.
"Oh, are you sure?
Does that mean you can't tolerate me?"
The buxxom tauren stepped forward, pressing herself against Marcus.
The substantial height difference placed his face squarely in her chest.
Unable to see, he flailed in protest, finally finding purchase on her firm backside -- his
muffled apologetic sounds only made her giggle and squeeze him more tightly.
Just as his other hand found her tail, the light dimmed as an imposing figure moved into
the doorway.
"What the..."
Tanda exclaimed, "Bax, no!"
Marcus pulled his head away and gasped for air, looking at the angry tauren with wide
eyes.
"It's not what it looks like!"
Bax charged, ramming into Marcus while uttering his challenge, "You mess with the bull, you
get the horns!"
Marcus reeled and caught himself, digging his heel into the dirt.
Seizing a horn in each hand, he held the tauren's head down, fighting against his tremendous
strength.
Bax forced his head up, grunting and spitting in anger, only to have it repeatedly pushed
down.
They locked eyes for a moment, and with a final heave of explosive force, Bax wrenched
himself free.
The powerful tauren swung his arms out wide, as if to crush Marcus in a mighty hug.
"Blades of Light!" proclaimed the paladin.
A huge, pulsing sword thrust up from the ground between the two combatants, tearing through
armor and clothing, searing the thick chest hair of Marcus and cutting a fine line into
the tauren's muscular chest.
Before they could move again, Tanda raised her hooved leg into the air and brought it
down with warlike force.
The man and bull wobbled, clearly stunned.
"Stop it, both of you!"
Marcus regained his composure and looked at Tanda, and then to Bax.
Fur was ruffled and the bare parts of their leathery skin glistened with sweat.
As they all stared one another down, the ridiculously good-looking Marcus spoke.
"Well, since we're mostly undressed already..."
<The story goes on, but your good taste prevents you from reading it.>
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