whoo I love Thailand oh what a what are the other flags she says? oh oh she spent
time in madagascar one or two times oh god oh hello out there in the Internet
well it's me it's you homie it's your boy professor gonad got a little couple
of things I want to talk to you today about. As you might know I'm I'm a single
and a buddy a friend of mine told me to get on these apps and try to find
a little bit of pussy for myself so I've been on there been checking it out
checking out the totty so like most guys on there you're probably the
same sometimes when you get a bit of a bonk on you might get on your phone and
start arbitrarily swiping on girls that you wouldn't mind trying to
get a bit of a nut going on with
but in doing this, there's something else that is also very much unavoidable when
browsing these tinder etc apps if you're a guy I'm here to help you highlight
what you should be avoiding because if you're basic as fuck as well you still
probably don't even know what to look for for the girls if you stop doing
these things you might actually find a guy who will take you fucking seriously
number one thing to stop doing saying that you're looking for just guy friends
if you're looking for friends why are you browsing the woman looking for men
category the problem with these girls is they like to live in a reality outside
of the actual reality they live in the reality where it's okay to cuck your
boyfriend while you go out looking for a boyfriend upgrade. The truth is when a
normal everyday guy sees a profile like this he's gonna do two things
hey he's gonna swipe yes and B think you're easy as shit because your
boyfriend is obviously not fuckin you properly and therefore you are dying to
get a jolly good rogering as soon as possible and this situation is bloody
perfect that's right you can bang the girl into your headboard as much as you
want and then escape at any moment because she has a boyfriend and it's not
really your fault oh god I felt kind of bad doing that
let's not do it again because you've got a boyfriend maybe should sort that out
the perfect bloody escape! Number two: girls who base their entire existence on
the fact that their parents fucked each other one time and she was born!They say
things like I'm mixed-race. Im half Japanese half Hungarian half English half
Canadian half American Indian my breasts are actually real and they
are actually this big don't ask again. My hair color is totally real I've never had
my hair I never will know my eyes are not blue they're actually a shade of
blue green emerald River Loch Ness monster fucking nobody cares. You do
realize that all of these things all of them all of these attributes were given
to you by your parents they are not skillsets you should not be putting
these in your fucking curriculum vitae and some of these girls even have the
fucking nerve to top off their profile with, "By the way! no ONS!", which to you
laymen's out there, means no one-night stands. So just hold on a fucking second
you've managed to only outline the things that are physically positive
about you yet you don't want anybody to look you as a sex object again any
respectable guy isn't gonna take you seriously and it's probably only gonna
go for the one-night stand anyway and that brings me to point number three
what is the fucking - putting no hookups or no ons in your
profile anyway like you somehow have any fucking control over that situation
whatsoever you do know how online dating works don't - people chatter online then
they meet then they talk and they maybe have a little bit of a good time a
little bit of a wild little bit of a jokey jokey and then the man might
decide at some point during that interaction that he might want to
fornicate with her and then the girl might say hey I want to fornicate with
the guy as well and when they're gonna go and fornicate it's not like the guy
stands back and says by the way this is only gonna be a one-night stand just
letting you know in case you don't want to go ahead with the packet he's not
going to gladly say that is it he's gonna say whatever the hell he wants
he's gonna say whatever he wants to get that fucking nap going he's gonna say
sure this was bloody brilliant I'd love to see you again over a nice cup of
coffee or something make me some crumpets and then when you fornicate
he's gonna bust a load all over your belly and then he's gonna decide when he
wants to see you again or not and he's gonna base it all on how your
personality was how good you have as a whole joy in the meeting including how
good the sex actually was now I fail to see during all of this that you can
control anything that is going on inside his brain regarding whether he is gonna
call you again or whether what happened was in fact a one-night stand or not but
really it's 2017 who fucking cares have a bit of dick enjoy it have a cigarette
afterwards maybe a cup of tea maybe cuddle up watch a movie if you don't see
me yet who gives it's white anyway he's probably a bit of a cunt number four now
this happens more on Facebook and Instagram and it doesn't online dating
apps but it's still fucking annoying as shit and it's girls who have to maintain
this aura of constantly being available even when they're in a relationship with
somebody and it's just so that every time they post a fucking selfie they get
their two hundred white knights running along and saying oh you're so fucking
hot you say beautiful oh god oh god
their relationship status is usually hidden because they're actually cowards
all of their pictures on their profile showed no signs of them being in a
relationship whatsoever that would look something like this this is me having
dinner sure there's a bunch of plates and you can see someone's hand there but
I definitely was eating a loner took this bigger bar behind yourself or this
is me and you're up standing by a beautiful statue who took the picture
well obviously I put my camera on a five timer chop stood in the air and it
turned around and took the picture of me flawlessly I'm definitely not here
fucking some Italian dude that I met on tinder bi my boyfriend's back or this is
me in a club all this don't burn you and I have our ice Oh would you look at that
very convenient Liam coincidentally buy every bag that my sugar daddy just
bought for me is positioned right next to the doorbell in yarn oh I'm such a
baller even though I work at Starbucks Monday to Friday and you can barely pay
my fucking rent but in the club I'm a princess go down to the dick shop buy a
jumbo pack of about 1,200 dicks and suck on all of them number five girls who
simply don't know how to fucking read or have the attention span of a fucking
modern internet user typical conversations you have with these girls
might go something like this hello hi how's it going great how about
you oh good just chillin cool so have you
been using this long huh have you been using this long using what long using
the fucking app long you fucking Muppet goddamn trick it number six girls who
are fucking edge lords and by that I mean girls who are generally dressed in
black and most of their pictures are one of the shitty deep English quote at OHS
they might also have in their profile somewhere that they work hard play hard
work hard play hard to you really let me guess that means you go to some
shitty club three or four times a week you get a bit sloshed on a couple of
rotgut vodka redbulls that you didn't pay for take a couple of selfies with
your friend on snapchat also titled work hard play hard all of your extra edgy
work hard play harder number seven girls who write shit like I'm a foodie and I
love traveling what's that you like to put sustenance in your body in order for
you to sustain life well you know fucking say what else is that you like
going to other countries and experiencing unique and fascinating
cultures rather than sitting at a cubicle at work Jesus Christ your next
level but at least you smart enough to find
the fucking emoji button because you've put the emoji flag on every single
country you've ever been to why I don't know nobody knows even more people don't
care because let's face it as I've said everybody's just trying to get a bloody
not going and nobody cares where your fucking bin Straley ah Oh Australia Oh
Italy oh bloody Italy hmm where else has she been Oh Kenya Oh
Oh Kenya Oh Thailand oh I love Thailand Oh what did the other flag say Oh
oh she's been to Madagascar what are two types oh well I guess duh
though they have it the seven top fucking things they're annoying as shit
Oh baby I won't title it that I'm not really sure I'm gonna title it because I
feel the blood rushing to my head and I feel like I might very very soon pass
out from being overly triggered at my own rent I'm sure there are a lot more
things that haven't touched on that you probably know about so please share in
the comments because I really want to read them all so if you like this video
please don't hesitate to hit the subscribe button because I'll definitely
be back with more shit I hope you light a fire with your tinder very soon this
is Professor Guignard signing off it's been wonderful see you next time peace
bimbo bimbo where you gonna go we opened opened Oh whatcha gonna do we open the
bamboo does your mommy know that you're going down the road to see
your little girlie you
For more infomation >> Lets Play - TES V: Skyrim | [#004] | Der Fund der Goldenen Klaue ! | Deutsch [HD] Grogon - Duration: 23:00. 
For more infomation >> NGƯỢC CHIỀU NƯỚC MẮT TẬP 8 - Duration: 1:25. 
For more infomation >> Итальянский набор петель для резинки 2х2 - Duration: 14:58. 
For more infomation >> Pence Walks Out of a Football Game, BlackBerry Motion - Monologue - Duration: 3:30. 
For more infomation >> ВОЙНА С HYPE CAMP ЗАКРОЕМ ШОУ / ЛИЗЗКА СОБОЛЕВ, а ещё ЯН-ГО, МАРЬЯНА-РО КОМКОВ это блоггеры, ок да? - Duration: 8:48. 
For more infomation >> Senator Cory Booker Is Very Concerned About Trump - Duration: 5:30. 
For more infomation >> Senator Cory Booker Wants to Close Gun Sale Loopholes - Duration: 2:50. 
For more infomation >> 5 faits INCROYABLES sur les continents! - Duration: 2:09. 
For more infomation >> НОВЫЕ КРУТЫЕ ИГРЫ НА ANDROID И iOS [Сентябрь 2017] - Duration: 10:56. 
For more infomation >> Салат из фасоли БЫСТРО ВКУСНО И НЕДОРОГО!/Вкусные рецепты простых салатов/Salad - Duration: 2:25. 
Không có nhận xét nào:
Đăng nhận xét