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I couldn't even face him.
I canceled the meeting and came back
All because of that bloody witch!
Papaji, I only scored 13 out of 25!
I know Papaji, I know!
Sorry, sorry, sorry!
I don't care!
Why are you being paid 1.5 lakhs?
You are my best teacher
Prove it!
I'll show you what I mean, bitch!
Stop it Kattya!
Here they start again!
Now, cool down hot heads!
What is wrong with you, Kaajal!
This is a mad house!
Oh!
Yes!
Come on Keshav, pay up 24 dollars!
Make it 20!
No!
At least bring it down to 21 dollars!
No. Not a penny less not a penny more, darling!
Let's settle it at 22 dollars
Oh, lord. Stop the bargaining Keshav!
- Here you go. - Thank you.
Why did you interrupt Kunal?
She was about to take the deal!
Oh, I just remembered,
Kunal listen..
No, no, no. I won't sell Mayfair Gardens to you!
Yaar, please sell it!
I'll pay 50 dollars more than the original price!
No,no,no!
100 dollars!
No!
Please yaar!
No dude! Come on lets continue the game.
Keshav, I just remembered about your weekly exams.
How much did you score?
Don't ask, man!
13 out of 25!
(laughing)
First Sinha sir gave me an earful
and then I was bombarded with all the family calls!
I see, you must have given many repeat performances of
(mimicking) Sorry Papaji! Sorry Tauji! Sorry Chachcaji! Correct?
(laughing)
1..2..3…4
(clears throat)
See, this is the punishment you get for mocking me!
You landed on my property!
Now hand out the rent.
(mocking) Oh no, this rent is just too high!
Its.. 2 dollars!
Here, keep the change!
It's embarrassing to even call this rent!
Tell me Keshav, why do you always buy this property?
It's such a bad investment!
Well, I feel bad that
nobody buys this property and its left abandonment.
So I buy it.
This property reminds him of his own story!
(laughter)
Leave my story, tell me about yourself!
What did your boss lady say?
Did your (students) score or not?
Yaar!
They did but only 93!
93 marks!
And yet she threatens to fire me!
Of course!
(Imitating) Because in mathematics only 100 marks are acceptable!
Kattyayani, what about you?
Did you treat the entire college
for being casted as 'Mrignaini'?
Hey, our party is also due, right!
No,
Party is not due.
Why?
Because I didn't get the part. Janvi got the role.
But only because she's dating the director!
This is completely unfair.
Forget about it,
tell me did you get that extension of yours?
No, thanks to Hansika – the bitch!
But now what will happen to your essay?
Aren't you researching about some 'Kantasions' ?
(laughter)
It's the Kardashians! Keeping Up with Kardashians.
They are one of the richest reality television families
in the world.
Their family net worth is almost
300 million dollars!
300 !
Million !!
Dollars !!!
How much would this be in rupees ?
More than 1700 crores!
Holy shit! I didn't know that they were filthy rich!
I know! And what do they do? Nothing at all!
They just live their lives and record it!
Isn't it a reality show like BIGG BOSS?
Oh no, no. In BIGG BOSS they have challenges,
they live in an isolated house (etc.)
In their (Kardashians) case,
they have invited the cameras into their own house
to record their day today life.
Its completely ridiculous!
But who would like to watch this?
What's so interesting about them?
Drama, drama and drama!
Their (outrageous) weddings, (scandalous) break-ups
and their insane fights!
Our kind of fights?
Oye, you still have some of it on your face!
Where? Where is it?
(Laughing)
You know what?
If we record this crazy kitchen fight we just had
and upload it on the internet,
people will gladly watch it!
Because people want drama and chemistry!
That makes anything famous!
What are you talking about?
I am serious!
If people had watched our kitchen fight,
we would have been famous in a jiffy!
By the way Kunal, you have to clean that up!
Why me? First you threw flour at me!
then water and on top of it you hit me!
I am not cleaning up!
(laughing) Fine leave it!
Okay tell me, hypothetically if we upload this
what should it be titled?
Its should be titlted
MACHCHI v/s BHAKTI (fish v/s devotion)
(laughing)
Fighting the food storm?
Arre, not the kitchen fight.
What should be (hypothetical) title of a show
based on our lives?
Whatever you title it, it must be Desi!
How about 'The Desi Kardashians'?
No, not the Kardashians out .Just 'K'.
The Desi Ks
Sounds better
Classier!
Oh, my class lady!
If you are finished chatting,
shall we clean up the kitchen?
I'm not cleaning anything!
(Yawning)
I have to go & sleep. Need to leave early in the morning!
Hey Kaajal! Its your fault as well!
- Good night, guys. I am turning in for the night! - Kaajal, you cheat! Wait a sec!
(laughter)
Alright then,
I'll take your leave as well.
(Suchita) Mittal will kill me if I am late again tomorrow!
Good night.
The Desi Ks, huh?
Who all wants tea?
They all are lazy heads, no one gets up in the morning!
Newspaper?
And its today's newspaper!
But who got it inside?
I'm the one to get it everyday!
Bag?
Oh lord!
What the hell is all this?
(gets up)
Hi ! (screams)
(yawning)
(screams)
Stop!
Stop right there!
Tell me honestly, who the hell are you?
Otherwise I'll spray this deodorant in your eyes!
It hurts like hell, trust me!
Ma'am, please just listen!
Stay there, otherwise I'll call the cops!
(singing) Morning!
So you guys have already met?
That's good, now I won't have to break the ice!
Oh, by the way,
I've brought the breakfast! Let's eat it here itself.
Kattya ,
(whispering) you know this guy?
Of course!
Manav is a friend of mine!
Hey, where's Rajat?
He has taken Kunal's shot and left for class.
He'll be back by 11am
Kattyayani,
why was your friend,
at this time, in this state
in my bathroom?
Arre, you need cameramen for the show, don't we?
So I just called these guys!
What are friends for anyways?
Which show?
Which cameraman?
Arre, our show!
Our reality show!
You are so forgetful, Kaajal!
But don't worry, I've planned out everything!
Keshav!
Kunal!
Please come upstairs!
Coming!
Kattya, we need to talk! Please come inside.
Arre, what is this?
Just come inside.
This girl will drive me crazy!
She's mad! She's completely mad!
This is too much!
Why are you guys so furious?
Don't you know! You have created such a big mess!
How can you make all these arrangement
without consulting us first?
And why have you brought these cameramen?
Arre , how can we record a show …
… (mocking) without the cameramen?
Which show?
When did we decide that we'll create a reality show?
Just last night we had decided…
Oh god Kattya! We were just joking!
It wasn't serious
But why? It's such a great idea!
It's a ridiculous idea!
You want that we should copy those Kardashians,
record our daily lives and create a (reality) show out of it?
Have you lost it?
Do you know anything about their lives?
Oh ho, we won't be living like them!
We'll be different!
Different?
How so?
(clears throat)
Hear me out, I've done a complete research on them!
How did these Kardashians become famous?
They simply started recording their lives
and release them for the world to see.
Their fights, relationships, controversies, scandals,
everything was before the public eye!
But in the beginning, they were just a normal family
A little entertaining, a little dramatic
but still a simple 'normal' family!
So?
So we are just the same!
But.. but we have better content!
And didn't you yourself admitted Kaajal
that if we post our 'fights' on social media,
then we'll be famous in a jiffy?
Yeah, I did! But still..
Then just image, what if we become famous as well?
What if people start liking our show as well?
Image we'll have fans, fan clubs!
Our name is on everyone's lips!
What if we become...
actual Celebrities!?
We become the talk of the town!
We get followed by the media!
People go crazy for our autographs and photographs
OH MY GOD!
Correct!
No bro, no.
Press, media, fans can just go to hell!
And if I am busy (shooting), when will I study?
And what if Papa-ji gets to know about the show?
Just imagine -
Once your family sees your
diligence and hard work on the 'show' itself,
how much they are going to respect you!
They'll be able to witness
your hard work with their own eyes.
Right Kunal?
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
Not just for your parents but for
all engineers out there, you'll be a big 'Prerna' !
How Prerna?
Abe,
inspirational bro, you'll be inspirational!
Just image!
Your friends, seniors, teachers,
everyone would be talking about you!
You'll become popular in your college!
Keshav Kumar – The Star!
Me ? A star?
Oh, really?
How will you become a star?
You guys know nothing!
You need a lot of investment and an entire crew
in order to create a show!
I'm not a part of this!
Kaajal , just hear me out..
Kaajal...!
we aren't producing a tv show!
It's the age of social media guys!
That's why we'll launch our show for the web!
And Kattya's friends will be our crew!
And we'll manage the remaing expenses among ourselves!
Guys, I'm ok with all this,
but you don't understand my point!
Letting people into our daily lives is very dangerous!
It can have really bad consequences!
Kaajal, you worry too much. Nothing will happen.
Those Kardashians are (also) so happy and famous!
Just because they are famous,
doesn't mean they are happy!
Guys, their lives are filled with too many problems!
Too much of competition, jealousies, betrayals, fights...
they are not happy!
Kaajal, you are over thinking this!
We are continuously fighting any which ways!
Nothing will happen, yaar!
Keshav, you do not understand my point!
What about our personal space?
What if something goes wrong?
I mean what if by mistake…
Oh- ho, calm down Kaajal, calm down!
Let's do one thing. Let's take this as an experiment.
Lets record and upload just one episode.
If there are any issues in it, even a tiny mistake,
then we'll delete it then and there!
Simple!
But…
And if you ever get uncomfortable,
then we'll shoo away the cameramen, right?
Sure, promise.
Let's try it once. It'll be fun!
Alright then!
if you guys are insisting this much,
then lets shoot one episode!
Yes!!
- But only one episode Kattya, just one! - Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Arg..Kattya! I can't breathe!
But what will be the name of the show?
Oh ( clears throat)
Well guys..
I've already decided the name of the show!
What is it?
Aah..
Stop building the suspense and just tell us!
Come on Kattya, please tell us.
Hint!
'K'
Have you named the show, 'K' ?
Macchi v/s Bhakti is definitely better than this!
Hmm. The 'K' stands for
The Desi K's !
– Correct?
Exactly!
Kattya!
Kunal
Keshav
Kaajal
The Desi Ks!
Good Morning, Kunal (sing-song)
Go-od Morning, Kaajal (sing-song)
(together) Good Morning Keshav!
Good Morning!
So, whats the plan for today?
All heading out for work?
Yes, work!
Alots of work!
I do a lot of work!
Because I am a RESEARCHER!
Yes and I am a teacher.
Teaching is the most noble profession in the world!
Yes, and I am a...
(whispering) Engineer!
Dammit, that's enough!
I can't do all this!
I am not doing this show!
Cut!
Keshav, whats your problem?
Can't you memorize a short script?
What were you stammering like this?
Engineer! You are an engineer!
How can you even forget this?
But Kattya, you are forgetting that I am not an actor!
I don't know any of this!
Obviously! That's visible!
And why are you taunting me?
Had you been a good actor,
you would have scored the role of 'Mirgnaini'!
Ah! You dog!
Argh!
(fighting)
Oh lord, what the hell are you guys doing?
Keshav, why couldn't you say such a small dialogue?
It's so simple!
Oh really! Then why did you forget your lines?
What? When did I forget my lines?
Yeah, yeah! She's right! Kunal
you too messed up a lot.
Your next line was 'education is vital for everybody'
This much change is acceptable.
The gist should remain the same.
At least I didn't fumble on my lines like Keshav!
Bro, I fumbled only because Kaajal distracted me!
Me!?
Yes you!
You must have looked at the camera at least 15 times!
Excuse me!
You were already (over) conscious.
I didn't do anything!
Actually Kaajal, his point is right.
Just don't look at the camera.
It has to be natural!
Then lets be (completely) natural!
Why are we even using scripts?
Oh no bro! I need the scripts! I have to learn the lines!
Its such a small line. You'll say it anyways!
It'll try.. to not to looking into the camera!
It'll try.. to not to looking into the camera! Yaar, where did the script go?
Come on, lets try it once again!
Kunal!
Where the hell did the script go?
Lets take it again from Kunal's second line!
Which line?
Keshav, come here!
Keshav, stop being so scared!
Invoke that actor within you, Keshav!
And remember -
Keshav Kumar – The Star!
Okay!
Action!
Good morning Kunal
Good morning, Kaajal
Good morning Keshav
Good morning!
So guys, whats the plan for today?
Work..
I have a lot of work .. to do ..
because I am a researcher!
And I am a teacher.
Teaching is the most noble prof…
vitality in everybody!
Yes, yes.
Yes, I am a Star!
I mean Keshav!
I am a Keshav!
Argh!
Have you gone mad?
You are 'a Keshav'?
Which line is that?
You are an idiot!
Kattya, I'd already told you
that I won't be able to do all this.
You forced me,
that's the only reason why I am doing this!
Oh really, and what you, who was just pleading
'Please Kaajal. Its will fun!'
You could have at least learnt your lines.
Kaajal, you better not complaint!
You were continuously looking into the camera!
I really tried this time.
Just check , it would have been less this time. I am sure!
Not at all! You were still staring into the camera!
And Kunal was still messing up his lines.
You guys will drive me crazy!
What's your problem?
You said it was okay to change the lines.
So I changed them!
And Kattya its easy for you to complaint
since you were not in front of the camera.
Huh!
Listen, my entry was planned alright!
But first you guys need to fix these lines!
Wait a sec, this camera is off right?
Nothing is getting recorded right?
Yeah, yeah. Please continue.
I've switched it off for a long time!
Leave him and concentrate on yourself!
Its idiotic that you haven't learnt the lines!
You can't deliver a single line!
But Kattya!
(fighting noise)
You know what!
I've had it!
I am not doing this!
I'm going to my room!
Arre, where are you going Kaajal!
I am not interested in working you guys!
Kunal, don't leave!
And I am also leaving.
I don't want to be a part of this stupid show!
Al right then!
Do as you like!
This is not my headache!
Don't shoot!
I couldn't even eat my sandwich, huh!
Thank god, I kept on recording.
This show will be a hit!
I've to pee! I've to pee! I've .. Hi!
That Hansika is such a number!
Sorry, sorry, lets try again!
You dumbos
I've heard that you guys are shooting here!
Cut!
What if it doesn't work out?
What if something goes wrong?
He had promised me that everything will be perfect!
You should have checked it once!
Was this your fabulous idea?
This is the whole bloody internet!
Is this the end of The Desi Ks?
Yes!
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