What did you get out of this session?
I don't know. The fact that you was
a black dude, that kind of comforted me.
You know what I'm saying? If it was a white dude,
I would've been up here looking at you like --
And like I said, "I'm not racist or nothing like that."
But it's just -- I -- Yeah.
It just put me in the mode. I'm keeping it real.
I'm just keeping it real. Please do.
I feel like you can understand, you know?
Yes.
Shit, this whole shit was racial.
♪♪
My name is Dr. Siri Sat Nam Singh,
and I'm a licensed therapist.
This week, I'm sitting with a young African-American rapper
who is accused of a crime he did not commit.
This experience was so traumatic,
he's considering stepping out of the limelight.
This is Freddie Gibbs.
♪ I first taste cocaine in 10th grade ♪
♪ Homie at the table chopping Rick James ♪
♪ Sent the package off from Texas, it's been 60 ♪
♪ The animalistic instincts that we was born with ♪
♪ Felt so pimpish when Alexys put me in they foreign whip ♪
♪ Black as hell but rap got me thinking I needed more ♪
Woman: Musician Freddie Gibbs appeared in an Austrian court
this morning on charges of sexual abuse
following a performance at a nightclub.
Gibbs, whose real name is Fredrick Tipton,
denies those accusations.
An associate of Gibbs, believed to be his bodyguard,
is also accused of sexual offenses
that relate to two young women
who followed the rapper's party
back to their hotel room following the concert.
♪♪
So, I know you have just recently been through
a very...trying time.
Correct. And you want to heal from that.
And so, we're going to create a safe space here
for you to really let it go
and for me to take it very gracefully
and carefully and to reframe it.
Turn it into something where you can digest
what happened to you.
I mean, it's all -- I trust you.
We got the same haircut, so --
All right.
[ Both laugh ]
We got the same barber, so I'm all right with you.
Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay.
Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good. Good.
So, what did happen?
I haven't really spoken about this and stuff yet.
So, I was accused -- falsely accused
of sexual assault on two women.
In 2015, I did a show in Vienna, Austria.
Some females had accompanied some of my associates,
you know, back to hotel and whatnot.
You know, what type of encounter --
sexual encounter or whatever it was,
I didn't know the details of it
because I wasn't in the room where anything took place.
I do a show in Paris, and then the day after,
I go to my hotel room and people just popped out of nowhere.
Like, it was a janitor, the bellboy,
the guy on the corner in plain clothes.
Everybody just turned around and, like, turned into police.
[ Chuckles ] And the girl had changed her story and said
that "I had a dream that Freddie Gibbs raped me, too."
And they said, "You're facing 10 years."
I said, "10 years? Are you serious?"
They said, "Yeah, you're facing 10 years, man.
But here's the deal, though.
There's something that they could work out for you.
You can admit to the crime, and we give you three years."
And I was like, "Nah, I'm not lying.
I'm not saying nothing but the truth."
So, basically, I got indicted off of some dream.
Their dream, but your nightmare.
Correct. Total nightmare.
And they wrecked my name.
They put a blackout on my name for something
that I would never be involved with.
I got a daughter, a sister, a mother, you know?
I would never impose my will on a female.
Is it still there?
Yeah, I would say so because, you know...
[ Speaking foreign language ]
...every night, you know, my face is on the news
in a white country for raping two white women,
a black man from America.
That stain on my name, you know?
It's traumatizing.
Paint the picture of what happened
when you were incarcerated there.
In what country was it?
First, in France and then Austria.
You know, the language barrier alone was frightening, you know?
I didn't know what this person in my cell was saying.
I don't know what this guard is saying.
I don't know what y'all think about me.
I would get teased by the guards.
They would come by my cell at 3:00 in the morning,
flash the light, and tell me to rap.
You know what I mean?
They had the camera phones out and shit like that.
What are some of the other things?
That's a lot right there, but some of those other details
that I'm sure you want to repress and forget,
probably very unsettling.
They placed me in a cellblock with people with swastikas.
You know what I mean? I don't need to be eating,
bathing amongst this motherfucker.
You know what I'm saying?
I don't deserve that. You know what I mean?
You know, I work hard enough in life to get away from that.
I'm having these ancestral memories sitting over here.
You know what just came up in my head?
What's that?
A free slave, a free man who was captured.
That's how I felt. I felt like I was in captivity.
This is very uncomfortable stuff,
especially in America
and even just sitting here with you.
But I've seen the two principles
that operate in race relations.
Unspoken.
Black men are not to have sex with a white woman.
Right.
And we're not to kill white people.
They can kill us and not go to jail.
They can take us out of our house and lynch us.
Those issues are there. Definitely.
I think that I was definitely on trial for having sex
with a white girl. Yes, you were.
And then when it was found to be scientifically
that I didn't have sex with her,
they were like, "Okay, you can go," you know?
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
I had science on my side.
That's the only reason I stayed there.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
You know what really comes up in my mind?
"To Kill a Mockingbird," where a black man
is accused of raping a Caucasian woman
and his arm was completely numb.
Couldn't have done it.
And it's so appropriate, you know?
A mockingbird is really a songster.
This symbol, this movie, this has gone before you. Oh, yeah.
So, what are you doing with this anger?
Oh, man.
I mean, a lot of this made me angry at the world.
It made me angry at Europeans in general,
for a minute, angry at my friends,
my job, myself.
You know?
I'm still not sure if I want to even do this anymore.
I don't even think I've been, like, in the booth
since I've been back, you know?
I feel like, um...
[ Sighs ] I've been put --
If doing this can put me in this position...
Mm-hmm.
...I'm not sure if I want to do it any more.
Everybody around me was a drug dealer of some magnitude.
You start to feel, at a certain point,
like people could just be like,
I hate to say it, but deadweight.
♪♪
♪♪
You know, this mental, unresolved energy
can result in the loss of your great talent,
not going back out there.
You're already talking that way.
Regular activities don't motivate you and excite you.
Not like they used to. Okay. All right.
Not like the things that I used to do, you know?
The going out and all the, you know, the --
You obviously have some extroverted energy
to be a performer. Right.
It's gone underground.
You're not being who you are.
This is male depression.
♪♪
Is fear taking over?
Just being, man, I don't know,
just being away from home and being away from my daughter.
I thought that I wasn't going to see my daughter
till maybe she was a teenager, all behind this.
It's just feeling like everything that I worked for
was being taken away from me
right at the height of my career.
I just came off one of the, you know, best tours
I did in my career.
So, I was on a real fast trajectory,
and this situation
took a lot out of me mentally, you know?
That's why I asked you what are you going to do
with this anger, this shame?
Are you just going to carry it?
Well, you do it.
It's releasing the anxiety,
tension, stress around it.
The more you talk about it,
the more it's going to lose power over you.
I think that if I could just, you know, fade to black,
I could be fine with that. I would. If you could do what?
If I could fade to black, I could be fine with that.
You know what I'm saying? Then just chill
and take care of my child.
I've seen what shame can do --
I mean, you know, what?
This situation has just made me, like, when I say,
like, "I'm going to fade to black,"
I mean, like, I just don't want --
It made me not like -- It made me socially awkward.
I don't want to be around people.
I don't trust nobody.
See, all of this is repercussions
of you don't know what to do with this anger,
this shame, this fear, this disappointment.
You've got a lot of feelings there
that are just weighing very heavily on you.
Yeah. Yeah, definitely.
You don't know who to associate with.
You're withdrawing.
This is depression.
Definitely.
Where am I? What do I present now?
Who am I now? Because you are a changed man.
Right. You have been in the fire.
I think what saves us, also, in life, is I always say,
"I've got three eyes." [ Chuckles ]
The intuition is all we have as animals. Right.
I hear those people around you again.
They're coming back, you know?
Everybody around me was a drug dealer
of some magnitude, at some level,
whether it be high or small, high or low, so...
You know, You start to feel, at a certain point,
like people could just be like,
you know, I hate to say it, but deadweight.
And, you know, they hustling in a direction
that I can't go in no more, you know?
So, I'm just hearing that you're now
getting rid of this recent group that you were in.
You say a lot of them were fakes, phonies, and frauds.
Correct.
This whole experience showed me
a lot about a lot of different people.
Yeah!
It showed me who was really in my corner.
When it was said and done, and I beat the case,
I saw who was trying to get attention
from me getting out. You know what I mean?
That's why I kind of refrained from all that social media
and things of that nature.
I had people FaceTiming me and screenshotting it
just so they could, like, post it on Instagram, you know?
Shit like that. You know what I mean?
It's like a lot of shit is just invasions of,
you know, the privacy of myself and my family.
I got a good woman at home and all of that. Okay.
You know, the mother of my child, she's great.
You know what I mean? Throughout the whole situation,
she was damn-near part of my legal team.
My mom, she flew over there when I was there.
Her and Erica, they came over there,
and my mom let me know there was, like --
She said, you know, "It's just a minor setback
for a major comeback."
♪♪
Anger is the fire element of an aerating system --
Fire, air, earth, water, and heat.
The fire is divine.
Anger is divine if you use it correctly.
Martin Luther King was a very angry man.
He goes down in history as a peaceful man,
but he elevated the country.
Am I making any sense to you?
Definitely.
It is not revenge and coming from negativity.
It's to elevate them. Right.
Otherwise, this will continue.
So, you're saying I need to use this experience to --
as a platform to be the voice for...?
Well, I mean, you're sitting here,
and you're feeling bad about yourself. Mm.
And I'm just seeing what this is doing to you.
And is this something that you want to carry?
I don't know. I don't know how to not be.
I mean, I could, you know --
I can't say I don't know how to not be angry at somebody,
but I don't know that --
That concept I'm giving you?
I can forgive, but I can't forget.
Well, that's what I'm saying.
I think I just want to reflect that part of you has died,
your trust, even your hope,
your career, your vision to your career.
Part of you has died.
I just want to sort of acknowledge that,
in addition to the fact,
just say it's necessary that you grieve.
It's a statement that we grieve,
so we dare to love once again.
It's hard for you to love, right now, yourself.
Yeah, if you don't grieve and really process this,
it may be hard for you to love again.
I love my daughter. Okay.
I love her mother. Okay.
So, that's a good thing. Okay.
They keep me going.
What about the love of yourself?
I think that my self-esteem
or my love for myself is always there.
I think that I'm just waiting on the right moment
to really unleash it again, you know?
I think that, right now, I'm just collecting my thoughts
and...refinding myself, so to speak.
So, this is adding more light
to your investigation of self?
And you're getting ready to be 35, right?
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
There's a -- You're entering a life-cycle change.
That's what it is, you think?
That's one component of it. Okay.
Every 18 years, your whole life is going to change.
So, 7, 11 and 18.
These are cycle changes.
Every 7 years, your consciousness changes.
That's 35.
You're going through a conscious change, you know --
different friends, this could have impacted
your relationship with women,
your relationship with your career.
You're going through a whole conscious change.
It's like, "Wow."
Every 11 years, your intelligence changes.
So, that's 33.
And every 18 years, your whole life changes.
That's when marriages break up,
and people do change careers.
People move from one city to the next.
It's a who-- What you did the last 18
is not going to work the next 18.
So, you're in the midst of this whole [whooshing]
Am I making any sense to you?
Definitely. I definitely do feel that
there's about to be some type of,
I don't know, spike.
It's something for you to...process...
process about you.
What's best for you?
You're brewing.
Dropping the dope in the water. Yeah.
Waiting to bubble it up. All right.
[ Squeaks ]
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, okay. [ Chuckles ]
♪♪
♪♪
I want to read some of your lyrics to you,
and you just tell me what they do to you now.
All right. Okay.
"So, lock me up forever, but this shit is everlasting.
I done been to jail and did my best not to repeat that.
I live on borrowed time.
My expiration date, I passed it."
Where is God in all of this?
How do you relate to the divine when you do?
God brought me out of that.
God brought me out of the whole situation, period.
Yes. Yes. Is it a kind of practice you do to deepen that?
Since you said God got you out of this.
Yeah, definitely Islam.
Islam. Definitely.
Okay. Definitely.
If you had to deepen into that,
what would you do every day as your practice
or every other day?
Oh, definitely daily prayer, you know?
Daily prayer. You know, just keeping a good
personal relationship with God.
I have a sense that, from your perspective, God is good.
Correct. Yeah.
With this whole thing, it's definitely made me step back
and examine myself, you know, from a spiritual standpoint.
I keep a copy of "Message to the Blackman"
by Honorable Elijah Muhammad.
I keep that in the car. [ Chuckles ] Okay. Okay.
So, you know, I'm just feeding my brain
and feeding my soul right now.
I think it definitely needed to be nurtured.
You know what I mean?
And I'm going to be bigger and better
when I decide to regurgitate that information
to the world. I'd like to give a word
to what I'm hearing at where you are right now
in this stage. I think you're incubating.
You're taking in things, and you're getting ready.
You don't know what this new birth is going to be.
You're brewing.
Dropping the dope in the water. Yeah.
I'm going to pick it up and just waiting to bubble it up.
All right. [ Squeaks ]
Yeah. Yeah. [ Chuckles ]
[ Laughs ] Well, you know, that's your experience,
and we're going to make you live with that, okay?
'Cause you did do that, huh?
Yeah, man. Mm-hmm.
So, where to now?
Hmm. You know, man.
My daughter's about to be 2, man.
Life for me is all about her.
Whatever I got to do to keep life comfortable for her,
I'm going to do it.
Even if that means I have to get back to rapping,
I'm going to do that. [ Chuckles ]
Oh, wow.
Can we say that was some progress?
[ Laughs ]
I mean, for you to say, "I may rap again,"
after what you've brought here
says to me that you released a lot of material
which was holding you back from your talent,
your skill. Right.
That which brought you a comfort zone. Definitely.
That which brought you a public,
which brought you endorsements.
Not that you have to do that any more,
but, yet, to hear you say that
in just this session was, like, major.
Definitely. Definitely. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
So, I have this little practice
of where it's like a little treat.
These are angel cards and --
That's what those are called? Huh?
Angel cards? Angel cards.
Okay. And let's see what they say.
What are they going to tell you?
What is this, a coochie coupon?
No, it's going to have a word on it.
[ Laughs ] I'm just playing.
It's going to have a word on it.
A word on it, okay. I'll check it out.
Okay. Okay, what does it say?
"Communication."
Oh, wow. Yeah.
So, communication -- That's what you did today,
and you haven't communicated to anybody,
from what you've shared, on any level.
So, I think the unknown, the spirits, were talking to you
that maybe your rap is communication.
Yeah.
Communication to those you decide to have around you.
They're very important.
You've got to find your team
so that the man that you are
can be supported and elevated and esteemed,
and you keep on rising... Correct.
...and own your power and sit in it.
It was my absolute pleasure
to be able to hold this space for you today.
Likewise, sir. I appreciate it.
We were heart-to-heart. Right. Well, you said it.
The only thing we missing was a blunt.
We could've passed that motherfucker back and forth.
[ Laughs ] You're trying to get my licensed.
[ Both laugh ]
♪♪
Thank you. Okay.
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