we are living with a lot of picked up concepts ideas that we inherit even from
people that love us and that we love who have not found the truth what is this
truth that we are talking about is it some sacred cluster of concepts what is
truth is it something you can read on a piece of paper or a holy book
what is truth everybody say I'm searching for the
truth if you find it in what form will it be for you if you are searching for
your glasses when you find him you can say aha here they are you can show if
you're searching for your children aha there you are you can come you can
find them if you are searching for a certain philosophy you can look and haha
this is the one I'm searching for if you're searching for the truth how will
you find it does it have a shape or a size or color is it religious is it
transparent
is it belief
is it different from you well to really know especially last point is it
different from you you'll have to know who you are yeah you cannot find the
truth until you find you you cannot find the truth while you yourself are a lie
does it make a little sense hmm yeah but to even have a sense that
presently our self conception is a lie that is already a kind of wisdom I know
that but I feel somehow trapped in that lie like a large part of what I live yes
there is something in you that cannot be trapped has never been trapped it cannot
even be free because these are merely concepts to it it is so pure but freedom
is a good word for now you say I feel so trapped because you have to rely on the
senses and the mind to evaluate your your situation you have to rely on how
you feel and how you think on your moods to have an assessment of how you feel
but the truth is nothing to do with how you feel because in the realm of
feelings feelings constantly change one moment you are feeling absolutely
beautiful and there are a few moments you're
feeling a bit annoyed or irritable about something next you're feeling so
wonderfully alive not a minute you're stiff board who can control you cannot
control anything you cannot control one man his wife it was his wife's birthday
and he said darling you've been with me so long and today for your birthday I
promise you I will not snore tonight is it can he keep this promise hmm with all
the best of intention I love you so much tonight I will not snore
well it means tonight I will not sleep basically
you don't have that control we like to feel we have this type of control yes I
will do this I promise I will love you forever and ever I promise I will never
hurt you I promise I'll never have to say sorry to you tall things to say and
we love saying things like that we love it there darling I'll never never we
love it but to carry it out you cannot feelings come feelings go if the feeling
come you cannot tell it when to go you cannot make an appointment with feelings
and say okay you stick around for three days you can leave on Wednesday you have
no control so suppose the truth was a feeling it would come you feel wonderful
thank you and then what happened that is also going and they said oh yes you know
the truth visited me yesterday but it took off after 10 minutes I mean the
what to say about it the truth cannot be a feeling then what can it be then
because we love feelings we love them they feel more intimate than thoughts so
I feel so good I feel it deep inside my soul these are feelings as any feeling
ever come and not go everything that come though okay
so it cannot be a measure of truth
belief you believe something I believe in this I believe in this mmm but things
will challenge your belief and what you'll do is fight you will send people
away don't come I don't want to speak to you because you challenge my belief
belief has to be converted into experience and every experience has a
beginning and an end there is something in which experience is itself
experienced
and you know what you're there you're there to watch the lies and the truth
the comings and goings of everything maybe you don't want to be maybe
something's I see I don't want to be so much there that I am unaffected I want
to be affected you see there's a feeling inside no I want life I want to be
passionate about life I don't want to simply be aware I want to be passionate
I want to participate you see why because we love experiencing every part
of experiencing the bitter and sweet the ups and downs we love the appointments
and the disappointments we love the smooth and we love the rough
it love no success and the failures huh love always it addiction is it love or
is it addiction to the experience I think we are dicted actually feels like
addiction it's a bit of both not everybody suffers from this some
people say I am tired of experiencing have you ever met anyone who say I'm
tired of experiencing maybe maybe one of you were tired of experiencing or just
maybe tired at the moment
because that can be part of it too lie right now enough but only right now
so something is in this and we are meant to experience the senses are there to
experience mind is there in order to be experiencing and all of this I find no
fault in it by itself we find fault in it because we have a lower concept of
who we are we have limited our identity to merely body-mind functioning and the
body-mind functioning is not consistent it says one thing one moment and felt
the contrary thing the next moment it cannot it what it is itself your
identity is relative yet it wants to behave as though it is absolute
something that's not possible so the personality personal identity
cannot be your ultimate truth it is always fluctuating unsteady by nature
inconsistent so as long as it persists that we identify ourselves personally to
that extent we will feel the waves the rock-and-roll of life and we may think
wow I love it I love it but even that is really not true we are addicted to it we
love and hate it it's part of it but what it is is that we are attached
to experiencing we love it
you
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