Waching daily Dec 27 2017

Get to know me. I want you to know things about me.

Although I come from the deep-deep hood--

That's why I want you to know, it's so funny.

Some of the things like, where I come from,

in the deep-deep hood, in the ghetto,

where a lot of shit don't happen that's positive.

When somebody get a job,

old people sit around and discuss 'em.

"Told you that girl was smart, didn't I?"

(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

"You know she work downtown, don'tcha?"

(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

Don't get an office job!

And wait a minute, black people, lemme tell you something.

Use your fake bitch when you need her,

don't just throw her aside.

Use her when you need her,

but reel her ass in when you're done.

You see, when you go on a job interview,

you need to take the fake bitch with you.

(APPLAUSE)

She'll get you that job, won't she?

She will get you that job, every time!

She'll walk in there all nice. "Hi, hello!" Speak to everybody!

"How you doing? Hello." Yeah.

'Cause she don't know if you the interviewer

or the competition!

She go in there,

and when she get ready to talk about your qualifications,

she pump yo' ass up so well,

you don't know who she talkin' about.

I'm like, "Damn, I can do all of that?"

'Cause she will put that speech pattern down.

That's when it's necessary too. When you go on a job interview,

don't go in there, go, "Yo, what up, ya know?"

Use the fake bitch.

When she come out and give you those-- those qualifications,

you be like, "Damn, that's--" She's like,

"Well, my qualifications, well, um, I program computers.

I know accounting and psychology.

I took a course in business and I can speak a little Japanese."

(SPEAKING JAPANESE)

(AUDIENCE CHEERS)

You got the fuckin' job.

And it's so funny when you know your friend,

when you know that fake bitch that you know,

got that office job, and she get a desk? Oh, Lord.

Don't give a fake bitch a desk.

Because when she come back to the hood and talk to you,

everything refers back to her desk!

I don't give a damn what y'all talking about.

"It's raining, I wish I had an umbrella."

"I had one but I left it in my desk... at work."

"Anybody got change for a five?"

"I had some change but I left it in my desk... at work."

Everything refers back to that damn desk.

And please, don't go that step further,

and give that fake bitch a phone on her desk!

Oh, Lord, her friends don't know who she is

when they call her there, do they?

'Cause she pick the phone up-- She got to

with the fake bitch act.

"Thank you for calling Social Security.

May I help you?"

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

Friend be on the line,

"Uh, can I speak to Tamika, please?"

(APPLAUSE)

"Um, this is Tamika speaking. How may I help you?"

"Uh, this Tamika Johnson?"

(LAUGHTER)

"Yes it is! How may I help you?"

"Tamika with the teeth missing in the front?"

(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

Then you got to break it down. "Bitch, it's me, bitch."

And she be proud.

"Damn girl, you got the job..." (SPEAKING INCOHERENTLY)

She be proud because you can--

And you know where Tamika learned that?

You know where she learned how to talk like that?

It ain't just start.

The fake bitch been around for years.

Because everybody here, when you were little,

you could tell when your mama was--

who she was talking to on the phone.

If it was somebody important and white...

(AUDIENCE CHEERING)

You couldn't see through the phone!

You just heard the fake bitch when she took over, didn't you?

'Cause when her friends called, it's like, "Hello?"

"Oh! Hey, how you doing, girl? I ain't doing nothing."

"Cooking these beans."

"Yeah, I know we had 'em yesterday,

but beans taste better the second day, girl."

(CHEERING)

"Girl, I can hardly hear nothing you said.

These kids with all that damn noise. Yeah--

Yeah, hold on, lemme--

Yo, kids, stop all that damn noise!

People think I ain't taught ya nothing!"

That's how she talks to her friends.

But you let the principal, or the insurance man,

or somebody white collar. "Hello?"

"Oh, hi Mr. Kennedy. How are you?"

(AUDIENCE LAUGHING)

"Gee, haven't received it yet? I mailed it out on Tuesday."

(CHEERING)

"Well, don't you worry, I've got the account number.

I'm gonna track it down--

Can you hold on, Mr. Kennedy? I can barely hear you.

Children! Mommy's on the phone now!"

(APPLAUSE)

For more infomation >> Adele Givens: In the Deep Deep Hood | HBO - Duration: 4:41.

-------------------------------------------

Conor McGregor vs Nate Diaz - 1 (UFC 196 FULL Highlights) - Duration: 3:27.

Notorious conmen

Bijan that's his fucking the biggest star in the world today coming off the patch just finished

The truck

This has the main

event of the evening

We've been over the walls protect yourself at all times

Follow my instructions glutes buff if you wish let's do this not a chance

Nate Diaz

Conor McGregor

Here we dope southpaw against southpaws

Connors movement is so brilliant

There's a nice left hand by Connor

Connor the aggressor here early good head movement by McGregor

And there's another one

Conner's plus two made up

Keep an eye on the cut, I of Diaz

Blood on the right side of the face of Nate Diaz 15 straight wins for Conor McGregor's

In the books

Crowd loving it justify him soap

Route 2

a lot of blood coming out of that right eye good move man by Stockton zones strong jab by Nate

Into McGregor here could he do it trying to get out of it got urgency

What a night ladies and gentlemen night wherein the winner by submission

You just shook up the world how's that feel? I'm not surprised motherfuckers

They're the new king of this motherfucker down is right here

It's a bitter

Bitter pill to swallow, I I took a shot I went went at it. I know there's a lot of people celebrating

For more infomation >> Conor McGregor vs Nate Diaz - 1 (UFC 196 FULL Highlights) - Duration: 3:27.

-------------------------------------------

Christmas card greetings. With the new 2018! - Duration: 1:17.

For more infomation >> Christmas card greetings. With the new 2018! - Duration: 1:17.

-------------------------------------------

Sussie Essman: Such a Small World | HBO - Duration: 3:53.

Every time my father turns his back,

my mother does this to me...

(MOUTHS INAUDIBLY)

(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

My mother-- You know, my mother lives for coincidence.

It's her whole reason for being in this world,

to find small world stories wherever she is, you know.

Like, she was very happy I was coming down here,

because my grandmother used to live here.

She's like, "You're going to Miami Beach?!

Hey, Grandma used to live in Miami Beach.

Oh, my God..."

-(AUDIENCE LAUGHS) -"Oh! Oh, is that a small world!

Oh, is that something!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!"

(SHRIEKS)

(LAUGHTER, APPLAUSE)

She lives for these stories.

You know, I saw her a couple of weeks ago.

She pulls me over. She says to me,

"I have a funny story for you. Wait till you hear.

It's marvelous. You could use this in your act.

That's how good.

(INHALES DEEPLY)

Your father and I...

We're on the cruise...

So...

There's a woman sitting at our table.

Delightful woman.

And I said to her, 'That's a lovely sweater.'

And it was. A lot of detailed work. It was stunning."

-(AUDIENCE LAUGHS) -"Wait, it gets better.

So, she said 'thank you,' I said, 'you welcome.'

She said, 'I got it in a shop in Cedarhurst.'

I said, 'Go on! I have friends there! Oh!'

She said, 'Who?'

I said, 'Well, let me think. There's the Schoenholtzs.

And the Lieberman's daughter. Lovely girl. Never married,

but a very sweet girl, lives in a gorgeous

condominium worth twice as much as what she paid...'

She got in on the bottom line there, and let me tell you,

she got some press." I'm like, "Ma, what's the point of the story already?"

Because once she gets into condo prices,

forget about it.

(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

It turns out... "She's Lester Levine's

mother's cousin! (SHRIEKS) We laughed! Funny! Oh!

Go figure! In the middle of the ocean,

such a small world... oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh..." (SHRIEKS)

(AUDIENCE APPLAUDS)

"Oh! You could use that in your act."

So I used it.

And, um... (SHRIEKS)

They all make that sound, the women in my family.

(SHRIEKS) Like, they're very loud Jewish women,

which is redundant, but, um...

You know what's always so fascinating to me?

When you bring a stranger into the family.

I would bring boyfriends home to meet my family,

and the behavior would completely change.

They'd go from loud, screaming, yelling,

to all of a sudden, they all turn British.

You know? (SHRIEKS)

(BRITISH ACCENT) "Oh! Hello, how are you?"

My last boyfriend I brought home, my mother started

wearing him down.

She started grilling him, you know?

She was, "So. Jay. What do you do for a living?"

He said, "I'm a musician."

"And...?"

-"And I play guitar." -"And...?"

-"And I have a band." -"And...?"

And this went on for, like, 15 minutes,

'till finally I found out he once murdered a man.

-So... -(AUDIENCE LAUGHS)

Maybe it's best that it's over.

For more infomation >> Sussie Essman: Such a Small World | HBO - Duration: 3:53.

-------------------------------------------

CANYON ULTIMATE IN THE SMALLEST RENTAL EVER on recovery day! - #cycling Lanzarote - Duration: 6:40.

but even my slow endurance zone went up my sweet spot intervals

boom 50 what higher than I used to do it so I have to push a lot harder on all

my training rides but all the other rides are still we're starting to feel

pretty easy so it makes sense

good morning guys cycling fanaticsss still on Lanzarote

today is a rest day recovery day it's Wednesday so that's day once it enough

five? five Saturday Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday day five on the island

first day we just chilled I put the bike together we relaxing the Sun a little

bit second day big ride third day was my FTP test yesterday there's not a slow

endurance ride didn't take the camera but today it's a rest day. only one hour of

really really easy but because we are at the coast in a little bit of civil and

industrial part and every big Road is a highway I didn't really want to take the

bike out from the start because it's just not really the roads are not really

good to just go for a nice easy spin so I'm taking the car out for about only

ten minutes and another reason is that everything is uphill from where we live

so if I want to stay my recovery power zone it's pretty much impossible going

up this hill I'm just taking the car up the hill and then I have a little loop

of about one hour I can ride very easy for the rest of the

day we're just going to chill relax we're going to have some just gonna go

so to a little beach enjoy the day and then tomorrow back into training luckily

we've got this big *ss car so my bike fits in easy

biggest rent-a-car on the island I can even think why the hell is he wearing

his helmet in the car safety first mate safety first

more cyclists

blue my bike kind of goes with the blue car how stylish is that

just one our easy recovery zone power should be about 25 kilometers it's

pretty cold Oh chilly should have brought a jacket too late now

check out these different layers pretty cool theother side, pretty big cliffs

descent views here on the island. I was trying to avoid the hill coming from our

apartment up of the island but now I'm riding up hills anyway so nothing is

really really flat it's best to have a big range of gears I'm on a... actually I'm not sure what i'm on

36-52 11-28 so that's a midsize compact it's

alright you can get up most Road but sometimes descending really fast if you

want to keep pedaling just spin out so this is nice long sort of descending

roads with maybe four percent three four percent and if you're doing a power

training you really want to keep pedaling but you go too fast so having

even bigger gear would be better but then you probably have a too big of a

gear for an uphill so it's a choices

after my FTP test of two days ago everything go harder because I added

fifty watts to my FTP me and Jim decided to put my new FTP on 350 it was on

three hundred which is 20 watts downgraded for my under- reading power

meter so that's 50 watt more than what it used to be for last couple weeks so

that's a big big difference tomorrow I'm gonna do some vo2 max

intervals and I'll do some 40- 20s on the high pace and those intervals will

really really feel the difference between this new FTP and the old one but

even my slow enduring zone went up my sweet spot intervals boom 50 watt

higher than I used to do it so I have to push a lot harder although my training

rides but all the other rides are starting to feel pretty easy so it makes

sense today however it doesn't really matter it's just a recovery ride so I'm

taking it really really easy nice and slow heart rate is only 106 average

power 150 so just cruising

absolutely everything is covered in lava everything

25k 58 minutes

battery low..... damn

For more infomation >> CANYON ULTIMATE IN THE SMALLEST RENTAL EVER on recovery day! - #cycling Lanzarote - Duration: 6:40.

-------------------------------------------

تحدي 1 : كليت باطة هريسة 😱😮 شوفو وش صرالي 😞 !!! 😭 - challenges - - Duration: 11:36.

For more infomation >> تحدي 1 : كليت باطة هريسة 😱😮 شوفو وش صرالي 😞 !!! 😭 - challenges - - Duration: 11:36.

-------------------------------------------

Benjamin Fulford December 25th, 2017 Merry Christmas The 13 " - Duration: 5:21.

Benjamin Fulford -- December 25th, 2017 Merry Christmas The 13 �Illuminati� bloodline

families sue for peace

In honor of Ben's wishes to withhold posting the full update here is a portion of his report.

This post will be updated after approximately 3 days since its initial release; usually

on Thursday.

Added links below.

- Justin

Peace on earth and goodwill to all (and not just men, but all life forms) is looking like

a realistic goal for 2018 now that the 13 �Illuminati� * bloodline families, seeing

their ancient rule of planet Earth collapsing, are suing for peace.

Last week a representative of the G7 (Germany, the U.K., the corporate U.S., Japan, Italy,

France, and Canada) met with a representative of the White Dragon Society (WDS) to discuss

peace terms, according to a WDS member who was present at the meeting.

The G7, of course, is the political front for the 13 bloodline families.

There can be no doubt that this meeting was made possible by people inside the military-industrial

complex acting in the spirit of Jesus Christ, and for this we wish them all �a Merry Christmas

and a Happy New Year.�

The bloodline offer to negotiate peace is directly connected to the state of emergency

that was declared last week by USA President Donald Trump.

If you have not seen it yet, please read the historic document in the link below.

�After Hanukkah,Trump declared a state of emergency and signed an executive order on

December 20th freezing the assets of those accused of human rights abuses and corruption,

a catch-all to bankrupt the Bushes, Clintons, Soros, Obama, the Cabal, and the global Jewish

mafia,� was how a Pentagon source summed up the situation.

�The national emergency allows Trump to seize assets and unleash the military to carry

out mass arrests and adjudicate via military tribunals, effectively imposing martial law,�

the source continues.

The Pentagon source also sent a copy of this photograph with the explanation, �Trump

wears purple when unveiling his national security strategy on December 18th in a victory lap

over the Soros/Hillary purple revolution, and drinks water with both hands to simulate

handcuffs.�

Clearly reacting to this situation, the representative of the bloodlines set the meeting for December

23rd, the birthday of the Japanese Emperor, and claimed to be a representative of the

Imperial family as well as the G7.

The representative, who acted as if he was negotiating a surrender, said the bloodlines

want to keep existing nation-states and institutions as they are, but� said they were willing

to cooperate with, and provide funding for, a new international economic future planning

agency.

The WDS negotiator said that existing nation-states and institutions should be allowed to mostly

continue and emphasized that the WDS was interested in creating something new, not destroying

anything old.

Some borders, though, such as the artificial division of the Korean Peninsula, would have

to be changed, both sides agreed.

Both also agreed that the United Nations, as currently structured, is dysfunctional

and in need of drastic reform.

Overall, the two sides were close enough on these points to be able to reach some sort

of eventual agreement.

However, the bloodlines delegate said they wanted to keep control over central banks

and the creation of money, because �if the people had control of monetary policy, nobody

would work.� He added that although there was a Council of 13 in Switzerland that represented

each of the families, many of the heads of these families were, like the Emperor of Japan,

not actually from real family bloodlines.

He said the families existed more as institutions than strict representatives of actual bloodlines.

The WDS representative said they support the idea that money should be earned, but said

people-controlled central banks could print money to pay for such things as education,

the military, public works, healthcare, exploration of the universe, and scientific research.

The WDS negotiator also said the WDS insists on a Jubilee, or one-time cancellation of

all debt, public and private, together with a one-off redistribution of ill-gotten assets.

If those conditions were agreed to, the bloodlines could continue to function in a diminished

role in the corporate part of the economy, the WDS representative said.

For more infomation >> Benjamin Fulford December 25th, 2017 Merry Christmas The 13 " - Duration: 5:21.

-------------------------------------------

¿Cómo Encontrar Silencio en la Ciudad? ¿Por Qué Cuando Indago me Mareo? Satsang con Cesar - Duration: 13:25.

For more infomation >> ¿Cómo Encontrar Silencio en la Ciudad? ¿Por Qué Cuando Indago me Mareo? Satsang con Cesar - Duration: 13:25.

-------------------------------------------

Chroma key and track mattes - After effects tutorial for memers - Duration: 3:34.

Hello and welcome to my below-average

After Effect tutorial m8.

Today we will look at some basics of chroma keying and track mattes which you can use in your super funny meme videos.

Xddd are you ready my dude?

Okay! Let's begin with some chroma key basics first take your green screen video or whatever color it is drag and drop it on this small composition icon.

Now go to the effects panel and type in key light.

Drop the effect on your video.

Click on this little color selector over here and click on the background if your background turned black you did it right. Congrats! 👏

My background turned red because I changed my BG color if you want to do the same... Just right-click on the composition,

composition settings and change the color to whatever you like.

Now take your dank meme and drop it in your main composition.

You did't fam GG well played. Now let's move on to some track mats.

In this tutorial we will use the overwank victory clip the link to the video will be in the description... Alright.

Take your video and drop it on the composition icon.

Duplicate the video in the composition with a simple copy and paste now move your slow mouse to the Trk map thingy.

Select the luma matte, and we are pretty much done here.

Side note if you don't see the TrkMat just click on the toggle down here.

Now add the meme to the main composition.

Right click on the mean transform fit to Comp this will make your meme the same size as your main Comp.

Now add a couple of glow effects to the meme and you're done GG EZ.

Now I'll show you a couple of tricks that will improve your chroma key memes.

Now take a closer look at this meme.

It is very funny, so let's added to our funny meme video just like before make a new comp and duplicate the meme video.

Add keen light to the top layer.

Select the BG color go to the screen matte tab and mess around with a clip black the white thingys.

I usually put black 40 and white 60.

Change the view from final result to screen matte if your video looks like this you did it right XD.

Now change the TrkMat of the bottom video to luma.

Cool go to the effects panel and find the hue effects.

Put it on the 🦆ing bottom layer change the channel control from master to green. Now slightly spread out these things.

reduce the green saturation to -100.

The meme still looks like shit.

But it doesn't have any green colors on it go back to the top layer and reduce the shrink.

Grow and add some softens to the edges.

Very nice return to the main Comp and add your fresh meme to the video.

Congratulations you did it! I hope you learned something from this useless tutorial.

Xddddd I'll give your mum the D. Anyway if you have any questions, or suggestions for more shit videos.

Let me know in the comment section down below.

thx for watching cya nerds.

For more infomation >> Chroma key and track mattes - After effects tutorial for memers - Duration: 3:34.

-------------------------------------------

Eddsworld - The Snogre (Русская Озвучка) - Duration: 3:44.

For more infomation >> Eddsworld - The Snogre (Русская Озвучка) - Duration: 3:44.

-------------------------------------------

Лучшие БЕСПЛАТНЫЕ АНТИВИРУСЫ для Windows! ПОЛНЫЙ И ЧЕСТНЫЙ ОБЗОР! - Duration: 9:15.

For more infomation >> Лучшие БЕСПЛАТНЫЕ АНТИВИРУСЫ для Windows! ПОЛНЫЙ И ЧЕСТНЫЙ ОБЗОР! - Duration: 9:15.

-------------------------------------------

President Trump and First Lady Melania Release Beautiful Christmas - Duration: 1:31.

President Trump and First Lady Melania Release Beautiful Christmas Greetings Video

President Donald Trump and First Lady Melania released a beautiful Christmas greetings video

on Monday that shows the First Couple standing in front of a Christmas tree as they address

the Nation.

The 1:44 video was posted to the @realDonaldTrump Twitter account at 8:36 a.m. EST and has been

viewed about 2 million times seven hours later.The beginning of the video focuses on members

of the Armed Forces and their families and concludes with images of the magnificent White

House Christmas decorations.

The Associated Press posted a copy of the video to YouTube.

See full video.

The video link is in the source article link below in our description

For more infomation >> President Trump and First Lady Melania Release Beautiful Christmas - Duration: 1:31.

-------------------------------------------

Class 12 History Chapter 6 Bhakti Sufi Traditions Important Question Chapter Notes, Important point - Duration: 13:23.

Class 12 History Chapter 6 Bhakti Sufi Traditions Bhakti Movement Sufism Hinduism Vishnu Shiva islam Important Question Chapter Notes, Important point

For more infomation >> Class 12 History Chapter 6 Bhakti Sufi Traditions Important Question Chapter Notes, Important point - Duration: 13:23.

-------------------------------------------

Jace Norman Introduces 'Blurt!' w/ JoJo Siwa & Daniella Perkins | Nick Original Movie - Duration: 1:32.

Jace Norman, take one.

Hey, what's up, guys? It's Jace Norman here

to tell you about my new movie, Blurt.

In my new movie I play a guy who suddenly says everything he thinks,

even embarrassing stuff, like I once ate cat food...

On a dare.

Cut, can we cut?

Hey, I'm Jace Norman and my new movie is coming out soon

and I think my fly's down.

Did I say that out loud? Yeah, can we er...

Jace Norman, here to tell you about my new movie, Blurt,

and I feel like I got something in my teeth.

Did I just say that out loud on... I did?

Don't think about your teeth.

This movie's gonna be awesome and I can't wait for you guys to see it!

I also can't wait to go to the bathroom and pick this wedgie.

I will pay you lots of money to delete this.

Please?

Don't miss Jace Norman.

Every little thing that comes through my mind,

comes out of my mouth.

Victoria's morning breath is even worse than mine.

- Excuse me? - Hmm?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, please don't fart, please don't fart.

Come on, don't fart, don't fart, hold it in, Jeremy.

Wow, even after hours of staring at her picture in the yearbook,

- she still turns my legs into jelly. - What?

No, no, no, oh, this is awful,

no, not you, you're not awful, you're hot!

You're actually way more interesting this way.

In the new Nickelodeon original movie, Blurt.

This movie is gonna be awesome, you guys are gonna love it...

And I just totally let one rip.

I'm sorry, no, we're not putting that in, can we cut that out?

Coming in 2018.

No, we're not putting that in the promo.

- Do we actually see that played back? - No.

Only on Nickelodeon.