Nicole: Something that all girls can agree on is the first few texts a guy sends her will
make or break her decision about whether she wants to see him again. So guys, this
is really important! You have to make these count. You can't just go
BS'ing your way through this text thing and expect to get a good response.
So I'm gonna show you a few examples of big texting fails to help you so you
don't make the same mistakes. Hi it's Nicole with The Attractive Man team, and
in today's video, I'm gonna reveal to you how a girl actually wants you to text
her and ask her out after you've gotten her number. I'm gonna cover the do's and
don'ts of those first few texts you send a girl, so you can make sure you don't
send her running away and can get a date fast. To do this, I'm going to show you
some text that I've received in real life, and break them down for you based
on the good and the bad. And then at our end of this video, I'm gonna tell you the
number one way to ensure that you get the date that you want, so make sure you
stick around for that. Okay, so the first types of texts you're
gonna want to avoid are the drunken late night text. Or the meaningless text. Now
these can be one in the same sometimes, or they can be separate. But the example
I'm going to show you is a guy who managed to combine them both. I'll let
you read that real quick. So you'll know the timestamp of this, it was 4:00
in the morning that I received the letter M and an emoji. What does this
mean?! I have no idea. This was a waste of my
time, and it woke me up. So this was not endearing, and needless to say I did not
text him back. You're gonna want to avoid drunk text, beginning of a texting
conversation with a girl because it's gonna make you seem like you don't have
self-control. And like, you may be a little immature. And also, a meaningless
text is going to be a waste of your time and hers. If you're trying to gain her
attention, and you send her something that she doesn't understand, or means
absolutely nothing to her, she's gonna move on. Just avoid these. There's no
reason for them. Alright, so the second type of text you're going to want to avoid is
the kind that's gonna get you screenshotted, and destroyed in a group
text with her friends. This can include anything from really bad grammar and
spelling, to excessive emoji or meme usage. Unless you're 12 that's not okay.
It can also include inappropriate text, or unsolicited pictures. I should hope that
you know you shouldn't send those things, but I still have to say it just to make
sure. If your first text to a girl includes a bunch of spelling mistakes, or
a bunch of emojis, it doesn't matter if you've just told her she's the most
beautiful human you've ever seen in your life.
She's probably gonna think you're an idiot. That might be harsh, but it's true.
There's just no reason for it. And if you're sending an inappropriate message,
even if you spend a lot of time with this girl it's just gonna kind of give
the wrong vibe. You may come across as creepy... You just want to avoid this.
There's no reason for it. So I'm actually gonna show you an example of that- Mesage: "If you
ever are bored and want to send some pics I'm your guy though winky face haha"
Nicole: A little background on this is that I met this guy the night before and we had
a great time together. We kind of flirted, we spent like five hours together,
actually. It was a good encounter. And the next day he asked if I could hang out,
and I couldn't. So that was his response. To just asked for pictures. I had a good
time with him prior to this, but that really gave me a creepy vibe. It wasn't
cool. I just met him yesterday. I don't know why he expected that this was okay,
you just want to avoid messages like this. It's not a good idea.
Following this text, which I will not include for the internet because I think
there's a lot of rules against that, but he sent just a picture of his naked
torso. And while it was a decent torso, I was completely turned off at this point.
It's just not okay, I didn't ask for that. Just avoid these kinds of texts
at all costs. Okay, so the third and final texting don't I'm going to share with
you is actually one of the biggest and most common mistakes that guys make
while texting. It's the non-committal text. If you want to see the biggest
collective eye roll from a group of girls,
ask them how they feel about the "We should hang out sometime!" text. This
basically translates to, "I'm gonna make as little effort as possible to ever see
you again!" and isn't going to lead to a date unless
the girl is desperate, in which case, hey you might get lucky, and good luck. Really,
guys sometimes seem to have this idea in their head that if they set a date and
time, then its suddenly something serious. But no girl thinks this way. They're just
gonna be thankful that you actually could make a decision. Because a lot of
guys can't seem to for some, whatever reason. I don't know why. Let's face it,
there is always the chance that a girl just gave you her number to be nice. This
happens from time to time, there's reasons why, I'm not sure. But if you are
straightforward with your intentions - I'm going to see this girl again -
you're gonna weed out these wishy-washy people who are probably just gonna flake
on you anyway. And that way, you are not wasting your own time, and you're not
wasting theirs. By the way, if you haven't yet, go ahead and click that subscribe
button down below. We have new videos every week. So go ahead and click that
Bell icon as well, so you'll be notified of when those are released. Anyway, let's
move on to the types of texts you should send a girl to make you stand out. These
are really gonna help set you apart from anyone else she may be talking to, and
help you get a date. Now the first kind of text you should definitely, always
include in those first few texting exchanges, is a unique compliment. Now
don't get me wrong, girls love compliments. You can tell her
she's pretty, you can tell her she's nice, you can say any great thing. But a lot of
times they can come off as a little cookie cutter... Like something you could
say to anybody. So if you can put in a unique compliment that really lets her
know that you paid attention to her, this is going to make you stand so high above
anyone else she's talking to. This can be anything.
I mean think about if you had a conversation before you got her number,
or something about her appearance. Just something very specific to that girl,
it's really going to be so endearing. I'm gonna show you a kind of funny example
of that really quickly I'll let you read that - Message: "It was great meeting you
yesterday. By the way you have the cutest sneeze" Nicole: so to explain this text, I met
this guy and we were having kind of a quick conversation, maybe 5 or 10 minutes.
It was going pretty well and then I got the worst allergy attack. I'm telling you
I probably sneezed 20 times in 30 seconds. It was really embarrassing and I
thought for sure I blew it. I mean I could not stop, like, we had to end the
conversation because I was just like a red-eyed, puffy, just the whole thing. It
was awful! So when I got this text from him the
next day, I was so relieved and it was so sweet that he kind of let me know that
he didn't care, that I looked like a crazy person, because no one is cute when
they sneeze. Unless you were a baby panda. I mean come on, seriously
it just wasn't cute, but this was really endearing. If you can pull something like
that from a conversation, or anything about this girl, she's gonna know that
you paid attention to something other than her boobs during the conversation,
and it's really gonna get you a long way. Okay, so the next thing that you should
do in every text or conversation is something I wish I could tell every
single guy. You have to make actual plans to see the girl. Make actual plans for a
date. Or if you happen to leave your balls at home that day, and you can't
call it a date, you still have to make plans. Let me show you a quick example of
a guy who did a really good job just sending up a casual date with me.
Message: "Drinks tomorrow night or early evening Friday. Let's say at Valentino's?" Nicole: So this
was great. Meeting for drinks - very straightforward
he gave me a couple of date options, so I can fit into my schedule, he even picked
a place that was close to where I lived on my side of town so it showed me that
he was listening to our conversation. Girls just want a guy who
confident and sure of himself and able to make decisions. If you can set a day
in time to meet her, you're already gonna be 10 steps above half the guy she
probably talks to on Tinder, or Bumble, or whatever the youths use these days, I
don't know. But seriously, just make plans with the girl. It's not that hard. It's
really gonna set you apart. And if you make the plans, this really opens it up
so that you are comfortable with the situation, you can pick a place that you
like, that you have been to before. So you're not completely thrown out of your
element, and you can really be your best self when you're on this date. Alright,
so I've covered a few of things that you can do to really make yourself stand out.
But now I'm gonna share with you the number one way to make sure you can get
a date. You're really gonna stand out with this. I showed you a couple of
examples of guys who seemingly did everything right, with texting, good
compliments, setting up dates, things like that. But they actually lost out to the
one guy... The one, one.... Who had the balls to actually call me. Yes, that's right. He
picked up his phone and used it as it was intended, and called me. This was so
shocking to me, I almost dropped my phone. I'm not even kidding you, this is so rare
that this happens, which is why it was this a surprise. Now, this conversation was
not long. It was actually quick and straight to the point. He just said, "Hey
it was really great to meet you this week, I would like to take you out this
week. Are you free?" and of course I said yes. We set a time, that's not important.
All of that. But this really displayed a level of confidence and courage that no
guy I had talked to ever did. This was really impressive to me, and it's kind of
nerve-wracking to be called, honestly. It really puts you on the spot, you have to
be quick with your thoughts and feelings, and ideas, and all this. It really is
nerve-wracking. But even if you hate talking on the phone, or she hates
talking on the phone, this is going to really make you stand out. It's gonna
seem like you have your shit together even if you don't. It's okay if she
doesn't answer. She may not... Maybe she's busy, it doesn't mean she's not
interested and it's totally fine to leave a text afterwards and just tell
her, "Hey, I was giving you a call to see if you wanted to hang out this week, or
see if I could take you out this week, or any number of things to kind of get that
flirting going. But calling a girl is absolutely the number one way that's
going to make you stand out above anyone else she may talk to. Getting a girl's
number it's just the first step, so I really hope you follow these tips and
tricks, and use them and go get yourself an awesome date. And if you want to know
how to talk to a girl once you're actually on the date, we have created a
free Conversation Cheat Sheet that you can download, where we cover everything
you need to know and exactly what you need to say to keep a conversation going
and spark a really good connection. We have everything from conversation
starters, to techniques to make sure you never run out of things to say, to fun
games you can play to create a flirty vibe and more. Make sure you click the
link at the right side of the page, so you can download it. You'll want to keep
that handy. Oh, and if you're not subscribed already, go ahead and click
that subscribe button. And thanks for watching. Bye!
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