- Why does everybody get offended at everything nowadays?
What is up with being offended and being triggered.
I'm like, welcome to the real world,
time to wake up.
People don't always play fair.
You should wanna be offended sometimes,
you should want people to try to offend you
just so you can learn to brush it off
and not be affected by it.
I mean we live in a world now,
like my Twitter, sometime I look at my Twitter feed,
I'm like oh my God,
have we become this soft, that unintentional phrases
that people tweet out or I was just downstairs
and I was posting on my Snapchat,
I got Noeli, she's Mexican
and I said oh man, something smells good
and I went down there, she's cooking in the kitchen,
I said you know Mexicans know how to cook.
She's Mexican, I'm not Mexican,
I know what I posted on my Snapchat.
Somebody's gonna be butt hurt,
oh, why you gotta be racist.
That's not racist, that's a compliment.
And yes Mexicans make good food, get over it.
You know I do a little Brazilian Jujitsu.
I do a little Muy Thai, a little boxing.
You want people to punch you.
You invite them to punch you, that's called sparring,
that's called training.
You gotta do the same mentally and verbally.
Find a friend, be like yo, point out my biggest weakness
and make fun of it.
Because one of two things are gonna happen.
One it will be motivation to fix it.
Let's say you're fat and yes I said it,
I'm not saying fat shaming.
I'm not, because being overweight is not healthy,
ask any doctor in the world.
I'm not talking about being a little chubby,
I got a little chub here.
I'm talking about, when you're, we got 35% of people
in America are obese and we're afraid to say anything
so we actually harm them.
We ain't helping them, no no no.
Ask a medical doctor, you think you know,
all you people triggered by talking about,
in the right way, I'm talking about constructive criticism,
cause when I box, when I do Muy thai,
when I do Jujitsu,
it's constructive.
They're there sparring with you so you get better
so yes, it is true that you could say it in a certain way
about Mexicans or being obese that would be not constructive
but you know what, even that's good training
because some people in the world don't like you.
And the sooner you grow up and learn
that some people aren't gonna like you
and they're just gonna call you out
just to hurt you, just to hurt your feelings,
the tougher you get.
And this world is getting weaker and weaker and weaker
as the tweets go by and the triggered people go by.
I'm going, you know what,
I'mma ask you this question,
it's a dark night, you're in your house,
it's three in the morning, you're alone,
you wake up, you hear a noise.
You hear two people talking, you put your ear to the wall,
you can hear is two burglars, they're in your house.
And they're crazy, you can hear that they sound drunk,
they sound like they're on drugs.
So luckily you got your cellphone by you.
So you put in the numbers of the 911.
You call the police.
Who do you want showing up at your door to save your ass?
You want a little politically correct dainty police officer
or you want somebody with a few scars on their face,
they've dealt with situations like this
where people ain't always nice.
And they come through the door
and they're six foot six 300 pound police officer
and they got weapons and they're ready to kick some ass,
who do you want on your side?
Well it's the same with the world.
We need some people who are sensitive,
we need that in the world, make no mistake.
We need some people who are nice.
But you know what, we need a balance.
It's okay sometime to be politically correct
and this and that and if you say his bathroom, her bathroom,
okay I get it.
People have been made fun of over gender issues,
people that are gay, people that are trans
and I understand that it's gone on for too long.
But I also understand that sometimes,
you're just talking and you're using English language,
an old language and you might accidentally,
because of the society we grow up with the social constructs
that we have, you might slip
and say the old school way of saying it.
And like I said, there's a balance.
It's good that society in a certain way
is becoming aware of these things.
There's some good to that.
Because it's allowing groups that have been made fun off
and disenfranchised to now rise up
and I'm all for that, if you know my stuff,
but I'm also talking about there is a flip side to it.
Which you mark my words, I don't care who you are,
I'm not so white so I've experienced racism.
I didn't grow up around rich people.
When I first started to get business
and being around rich people,
kids who grew up and inherited their money.
They looked down on me, they tried to ostracize me.
My last name's Lopez.
Those people don't like Lopez.
Even like I said, I'm not even that Spanish
in terms of my DNA but some people
well they just hear that word
and Lopez, ah, I don't like that person.
But you know what I learned,
you better rise through it, you better be tough.
Because if all you do is get offended
and all you do is howl and whine,
it don't affect them.
They're already mean people.
You think you affect the mean, scientists have found
that if someone's psychotic,
which is related to having no empathy,
being quote unquote, mean.
They don't respond to negative cues.
They don't, so if you say to them
oh you're being mean to me,
they don't care, they know it,
they're mean people.
So what you have to do is have that thick skin.
You know what calluses form on your feet to do?
Calluses form to protect your feet from rocks,
from thorns, that's why we develop that.
And there's mental calluses that need to form.
And if you're one of those people that's too sensitive
or you're always around people that are too sensitive,
you gotta grow up.
You have to look at the cause, in fact,
one of the books that I like the most
is called the four agreements.
Best selling book.
And one it's four rules for living a better life.
And one of them is, don't take things personally
because 99% of the time they ain't even about you,
even if they're using your name
it's not about you.
Sometimes let's say you go on social media.
You start posting on social media,
you're gonna get someone who negatively comments.
Most of the time it's about them,
they're having a damn bad day,
they're a cynical person, they're Machiavellian,
they're psychotic, why react?
Delete em.
Or just read your negative comments sometimes,
on purpose to toughen up.
Don't do that all the time because the human brain
don't want to always be offended.
But as a process just like boxing,
let somebody punch you in the head
so you learn to put your guard up.
You ever seeing boxers they get hit in the stomach
so their stomach muscles form stronger and stronger
because someday somebody is gonna hit you in the stomach
and it's the same mentally.
We live in a society where we just wanna remove
all obstacles, all hardships, all calluses forming ability,
calluses forming exposure.
Exposure to things that make you tough.
Fuck that.
Look I didn't grow up rich
so I didn't know what the norms was, I never.
But now things are a little bit different.
Around some billionaires, you know.
Every billionaire I met is tough.
I'll tell you one of my favorite stories.
This isn't of a billionaire,
although he's a very wealthy person.
I love basketball, today I was actually celebrity coach,
my team won.
I'm wanna know as a coach so I might retire now
as a 100% undefeated coach.
Yeah there was, let's see who was there.
DaMar DeRozen was there, he wasn't playing,
Meta World Peace was coaching against me from the,
we played in Lakers last year,
Swaggy P was there from the Lakers
now he's up at Golden State.
We had D Storm was there,
Logan, Jake Paul, we had TO,
all these, 20, 30 people on the stadium.
I mean in the high school.
And one of the things that I was thinking about
just my love of basketball was a story
that Shaquil O' Neal told.
Shaquil O' Neal, you know him,
he's one of the biggest basketball players.
He's a big dude.
He played at about seven foot two.
He was about 300 pounds.
Seven foot two, 300.
He had shoes, he wears like 23s or 25s or something,
a big man.
So when he came into the league he was used
to being the biggest person, always his whole life
growing up.
So he goes, one of his first, it was his first he's,
I don't know if it's his first game.
He's playing against a man named Hakeem Allajuan.
Hakeem Allajuan was a legend but he was older
and he was a player that I think was on,
Orlando versus (mumbles).
And Shaq said during the game,
when he usually was trying to intimidate an opponent,
he would throw one of his big elbows,
seven foot two, 300 pound guy, bouw.
And he elbowed Hakeem Allajuan.
And he said usually one elbow and people were intimidated
the whole game.
And he said, Hakeem Olajuwon just ran up beside me
and next time on the court he just said,
hahahaha, good one.
He laughed and you know what, that psyched out Shaq
because oh my god, this dude's so tough,
I throw my worst at him and he's laughing
and that's why I said you gotta train yourself
to laugh at adversity.
We, everybody wants somebody to pat them on the back
when they're crying over adversity
and there's a time for that, make no mistake.
It's like Ecclesiastes says, there is a time for everything,
there is a time, there's a winter, there's a spring,
there's a summer, fall.
There's a time to be nice and there's a time to be mean.
First rule of life, they say that the wisest man
in the world Solomon wrote that.
Proverbs, Ecclesiastes.
He said there is a time to love
and there is a time to kill.
Oh people don't like to hear that in the modern world.
There is a time to kill.
When you're in your house, two people come through,
they're on meth or whatever they're on
and they're gonna kill you or your family,
it's a time to kill.
Some people don't want to hear that.
Their hands up in the sky, oh no no no, just,
what are you gonna do?
Kumbaya?
No there's a time to kill.
But there's also a time to make peace.
And sometimes we go to war too quickly.
We need to live in a world,
that's why I said where that balance is struck.
And the only way you will become balanced
is to do the opposite.
To do the opposite.
So if you're always, somebody that always starts a fight
and always fights back, then you need to learn
how to become a peace maker.
That balances out the brain,
the brain must be balanced, the ying and the yang,
all that, people been saying this for centuries.
But as I've said, if you watch twitter,
it's a world where every single person on there,
not every, but millions are on the other side.
They're not, when life comes at em, throws em an elbow,
they don't have the ability to hahahaha, good one.
Good one big fella.
You gotta have somebody come up to you,
cut you off in traffic, look back at you
and you just go, tahhh, that funny.
This dude, look at this person just got a bad day.
And I'll tell you why you gotta do that.
I'm talking practical tip, the other day,
somebody cut somebody off, it was in the news.
It was a guy and an 18 year old girl cut him off,
they got a little road rage incident.
He got out and shot her in the head,
instantly killed her, her car went into a tree.
Forget what state it was in, she was 18
and she was black and he was white
but they said it wasn't race or you know,
this dude was just nuts.
And so, I don't know the details.
But I'm telling you there's a lot of crazy people out there.
So if that's you in a situation and you don't know
how to deal with the situation,
you don't know how to deal with conflict
because your first motive is just to get offended
and cry or scream at somebody,
there's crazy people with bullets out there.
And I don't care about gun control,
what people say, there's still,
you take away guns, look what happened in London,
you take away guns,
people are gonna be stabbing people with kitchen knives.
You take away kitchen knives people are gonna be running
people over with cars so the moral of the story is
you gotta learn conflict, how to deal with conflict.
And if your only default mode is highly offended,
well sometimes you can get popped in the face
and you're not gonna recover, ever.
So I'm not saying I have the answers of when to do what.
I make a lot of mistakes on this.
But I'm thankful that mentors taught me years ago,
there's a time to be offended
and there's a time to shrug it off.
There's a time to be offended
and there's a time to welcome the offense
because it makes you stronger as a person.
You know Arnold Schwarzenegger,
cool I was over at his house,
hey check out these pictures I got.
I was at his house, he gave me two pictures.
Well there was a little charity auction,
he didn't give em to me.
This one is the famous one but behind there is a picture,
an awesome one, a famous one he had above his bed with him,
it's that famous one of him doing isolation,
curls bicep curls.
But one of the things that I love his story,
when he was growing up, he was always naturally, he said,
stronger in his upper body.
He had a perfect chest, big arms,
seven time Mr. Olympia.
But his legs were his weaker point.
He said most body builders didn't want people,
they were sensitive,
they don't want people to see their weaknesses.
They would cover up their weaknesses.
So like he said, he knew some body builders
if their legs were weak, they would wear long pants.
And if their upper body was good,
they would wear a tank top
so people could see everything good about them
and they cover all the weaknesses
but Arnold said, forget that,
I'mma get tough, I'mma motivate myself
and he would wear shorts,
which showed the whole world
how little his legs were.
And he would wear baggy sweaters
so the world couldn't see his strength.
see he was actually toughening himself up.
He was taking his weakest points
and putting them out there
so that people would make fun of him
and laugh at him and say
this dude ain't a tough body builder,
look at his little pencil leg.
Where is leg, it's leg day, don't skip leg day.
And everything he could defend himself with, he hid.
And you know how he did that, he said,
it gets you out of bed in the morning.
We live in a world, people writing me all the time,
Tai I procrastinate, where do you find the motivation,
sometimes you might find the motivation
in people offending you.
The other day, if you saw my little video on Instagram,
somebody is like Tai
you can only shoot from the top of the key,
you can't shoot from the baseline.
So I just whipped out the camera,
start hitting baseline shots.
And baseline actually is my weakest area
to shoot basketball from.
And so I said, I'mma use this idiot
who tried to offend me but now I'm not offended.
This guy is my fuel.
This dude who meant to do me harm,
for whatever reason, whatever issues he had.
He's actually my salvation.
My salvation to do my bad shot on the baseline.
Do that, tweak your mind.
You're only free when you're the master of your thoughts.
One of the greatest philosophers,
sorry not philosophers,
one of the greatest thinkers and scientists
and psychologist was Sigmund Freud, he's,
Sigmund Freud is one of the founders of modern psychology
over a century ago.
He said that pain, pain, which is what people experience
when they're offended.
Pain is subjective.
Now some pain isn't.
If you drop a, one time I dropped a weight on my toe,
lifting weights, like two or 300 pounds on my foot.
That was real pain.
But some pain, like I said about Arnold Schwarzenegger,
someone making fun of his legs,
he turned it into not pain
because the end result was he had badass,
in fact, he was so self conscious about his legs
and he highlighted into the world,
that he flew to South Africa,
he trained under a man named Reg Park
who showed him how to do Calf Raises correctly,
he wasn't doing them right,
that's why he had little legs.
And he went back after in South Africa,
after he was trained by this mentor.
He had been driven there, motivated to go there
because of people making fun of him
but he had taken it correctly, gotten stronger,
gotten fuel motivated and when he came back, people said,
we don't believe you, we think you had surgery
to get your calves so but he said no,
I just had people talking crap about me
and every time I was in the gym
and I want to give up, I just put another 100 pounds
on the calf raise, donkey calf raises, all this stuff.
And he became a machine, you gotta do the same in your life.
As I was saying going back to obesity,
of people being broke.
If I say broke people say Tai you should not,
but today I posted on Instagram I said,
don't try to fix stupid people.
Number one, you rarely can do it and it takes up
a lot of damn time, just move on to good people
in the world people said Tai
you shouldn't say the word stupid because,
who are you to say.
Oh we all know what's stupid, come on, shut up.
You don't know what a stupid person,
you're telling me, it's all in the eye of the beholder.
No, there's genuine.
And I'm not talking about IQ.
I'm not talking about people develop mentally
who are handicapped.
You think that's what I was talking about.
Don't help handicapped people.
Off course that's not what I'm talking about,
off course you always help the helpless.
That's pure religion right there,
I don't care what religion you are,
help the helpless.
I'm talking about people who are stupid, ignorant.
About people who are offended that I hadn't pick,
they couldn't just get the gist of what I post.
Now more than 90% of the comments were positive
but you always get that 10% and people gotta find a way
to get butt hurt.
And that's the modern politically correct,
it's overly politically correct.
I'm all for a little political correctness
but I'm also for a little bit of not.
You call me, one thing I like about social media,
people are like what have you learned from social media,
well I learned a lot.
Reached over 200 million people.
I've learned a lot about psychology.
I've learned about trends.
I've learned about mass psychology,
how the 25 cognitive biases affect people,
social proof, association bias,
these are more complex concepts I'm not gonna explain
in this video but,
countain fairness, reciprocity bias,
all those things.
But one of the things that I've learned is that,
this kinda sensitivity is feeding on itself
and it's getting worse, not better.
It's feeding on itself, see, a 100 years ago
all the sensitive people were afraid to say something.
They didn't have a forum, they didn't have social media,
they just kept that stuff to themselves.
So in some ways the world's better.
Now if you're an introverted shy person,
you've got a platform to speak out,
you can leave a YouTube comment on Instagram
and your voice can be heard.
And in, like I said it's a balance.
Part of that's great and part of it's not.
Because I'll give you an example.
Some people, a hundred years ago,
they used to stay away from the crowds
and used to be super shy.
Some of them were crazy, that's why they didn't
want to talk to anybody.
And they used to just sit in their basement
and what, I don't know that they did a 100 years ago.
Write pen pal letters.
But now one of those idiots can get on YouTube
and Instagram and spend eight hours just,
and Psychology Today did a fascinating study on this.
What I'm saying is not just my opinion,
it's hard science.
If you Google the psychology of comments, commenters,
you can just Google that phrase.
Psychology Today, one of the biggest publications,
did extensive scientific research on this
and they found yes, it's true.
Most of the people leaving weird comments on Instagram
and YouTube, Facebook and all this
are people who have literally,
classic psychological impairments.
They're psychotic, they're Machiavellian.
It's called the Dark Triad.
There's actually something called the Dark Diad
and there's the, so there's even sadistic things,
like people who like to kill animals.
A hundred years ago they were like torturing animals.
Now they can try to get and torture you.
Go on your Facebook.
So here's what I learned
after reaching a couple 100 million people.
I've watched my stuff, just on Facebook,
not even counting YouTube.
But let's just say a 100, 200 million people.
So I've got now a broad survey
from over 150 countries, it's not just my experience
from LA or 40 year olds or 20 year olds or males or females,
there's a broad audience
and one thing that I've learned
that's very fascinating.
Is that you can toughen up.
Because when I first got on social media it's like,
oh man, there is people and your brain
gravitates toward the negativity,
it's called the negativity bias of the brain.
And so your brain gravitates,
when you get a negative comment on your Facebook,
even if you got 10 nice ones, you get one A Hole,
then you're like, all you can think about all day
is like uhn.
I know one of the most famous people in the world,
I'm not gonna say their name,
an A list celebrity, A plus list celebrity,
that I did an interesting talk with
and they read all their comments
because they're you know.
So even, I don't care if you have five followers
or five million followers,
this affects everybody
and so what happens that I had to learn which is,
I'm very happy it happened is I went through this process
of at first you're like, wow,
'cause we're not used to reaching that many people.
A hundred years ago, you couldn't reach many people.
Maybe you wrote a book or a newspaper,
but it wasn't like now.
Or you see people getting a million social media followers
in a month, right
and also they can reach a million people
and so the world opens up.
So as I did that, I was like, man this is interesting
because I had to go through that process
of hardening up.
Now you call me a name, you're like oh Tai Lopez,
you're buh.
I think it's funny, I read my mean tweets, I laugh.
I actually took my office and had them post
the meanest comments.
Because it's just like boxing, it's just like Jujitsu,
it's just like kickboxing.
You must spar and sparring is the process
of fighting against a person
in a controlled environment.
Now when people leave a negative comment to you,
when people talk crap, when you try to do something,
people are talking crap to you,
it's online, it's a controlled environment,
they can't reach through and punch you in the face.
If it's in person you might have to escape.
If you are ever out somewhere,
some crazy person comes talking crap at your face,
as I told you, someone just got shot in the head
over a road rage incident.
So but I'm talking about a controlled environment
like Jujitsu, Boxing, you're in a ring,
or you're rolling on the mats
with a trainer, with a teacher.
But when it's online, when you get those,
use 'em to toughen up.
And if there's some truth in em,
use them to adjust your life.
So if someone makes fun of you for being too skinny,
for being too fat, for being this,
ask your doctor if they're right.
Don't ask me, I'm not a judge, I'm not a medical doctor,
but your medical doctor will tell you.
Some people are big boned and some people are fat.
Some people are, and if you're super overweight
or super underweight,
it ain't healthy, you die younger.
You get metabolic problems.
Let's not kid ourselves.
Some people got glamp, that's why I said
ask your damn doctor.
Go be like, hey a lot of people are saying this
about my body, I'm too skinny or I'm too fat,
I'm blah blah blah, if the doctor,
you going to the doctor and he checks you out
and he goes, hmmmm, you do need to loose 20 pounds
or you need to gain 20 pounds,
then listen to the damn doctor
and be thankful you got those negative comments
because they pushed you to health.
Or nowadays we live in a world
where you're gonna argue with doctors.
You're gonna argue with medical doctors
'cause that's some, people will do that.
People argue with medical doctors.
No, every shape is beautiful.
Well it is in a kind of way,
but not everyone's healthy.
There's more science on that than anything.
Like I said this all started because I,
Norelli was over there cooking some food.
If someone says Mexicans are good cooks,
why do we have to be triggered?
If you say, well it's because, other races
are good cooks, I mean other ethnicities are good cooks,
other countries.
Well if Mexican's got a better name than some other country
then let that other country use it as motivation
to become even better cooks
so the whole world knows them.
A lot of people like Mexican food.
So if you live in Norway, if you live in Chile,
if you live in Mozambique or if you live in Vietnam
and you're like, well wait a sec,
why is Tai pointing out Mexicans.
Use it as fuel, why not.
And that's kind of a stupid example
but kind of not a stupid example at the same time.
Use it as fuel.
If somebody says, uh, you're broke, you're stupid,
read a book.
When I was young, one of the pivotal moments in my life,
and I've told this story before
but you may or may not have heard it.
I was with some five mentors,
who 20, 30 years older than me,
I never made really much money.
I made 10 or 12 grand in my first business,
these guys were multimillionaires, I was still,
I think actually I was a little older than a teenager.
I was early 20s, these guys were 50s,
some of em 60s, 70s.
There was one guy Doctor Gordon Harzard
who I think was about 80 at the time.
And what happened was, I told him,
I'mma be a business man.
And these five guys, they have been drinking.
It was actually a hunting lodge.
They have been drinking and they looked over
and they said to me,
Tai are you gonna be an entrepreneur,
you're gon' make money.
Do you know anything about money?
I was like, yeah yeah I do.
And they said okay, what's ROI mean?
No IRR they said, IRR.
Which now I know means internal rate of return,
it's a way of calculating how well your investments do.
It's a little different than ROI,
it factors in cash flows and other things.
So I was like, I don't know.
And I'll never forget, these five guys that I looked up to,
sit there laughed at me and said,
you probably ain't gonna ever be anything Tai.
And man I'm not a dude that cries very much
but that was one of the time when I felt like crying,
but I didn't.
And you know what I said to myself,
I said if these guys, smart guys, who know about business
have that opinion of me, they're probably right.
I'm gonna change my life
so no one can ever say that about me.
I began to study finance,
I went on, I worked at GE Capital.
I started self study because formal education
will make you a living but self education
make you a fortune.
Formal education will make you a living
but self education could make you a fortune.
I said I wanna make a fortune, not just a living.
And so, I said I'mm become a certified financial planner.
I went on, I got certified for that.
That was a phase in my life.
I no longer do financial planning.
I did it for about five years of my life.
I'm no longer a certified financial planner
because I'm not in that industry anymore.
But I did it just so I could do it.
So that in my mind I could say if anybody ever says to me,
you're an idiot you don't know about business,
I'll be like, oh yeah, let's talk.
And now, I sit down with billionaires.
I sit down with some of the top business people in the world
and I never once had them say
you're an idiot about business.
Now they might know more than me
and I don't know everything.
But nobody thinks I don't know about business.
Nobody.
Because I vowed to myself instead of getting to weak willed
and too triggered and too offended I said,
these guys were right.
Yeah I'm offended
but I'mma use it to build a mental calyce.
To strengthen myself and get stronger.
I said you know what, nobody will ever say that again.
So you know what, one of the most in shape people
I known in the world,
I used to have a bouncer
I used to own night clubs in North Carolina,
there was a bouncer named Franko,
one of the strongest humans I've ever met
and I'm talking this dude bench five, six hundred pounds.
He was two, I don't know, 260.
And he could do 20 or 30 pull ups.
You rarely see a guy that strong.
And Franko always ate perfectly.
Like, I own a nightclub.
I run a nightclub business
so we used to operate multiple clubs.
I would cut a deal, they own the club
and I'll operate em,
and that was cool 'cause I didn't have much cash
so I didn't have to buy a building.
I let them do it and I just basically cut a,
we did what was called a joint venture
where we split the money.
And so there was a place called Wedroom
in Riley North Carolina.
I'm not sure if it's still there,
I sold that business about seven years ago.
And Franko, we were there, Wedroom had amazing food
but it wasn't always the healthiest,
it was like Spanish Topas
and Franko, this big strong guy,
he always was more disciplined than anyone I knew,
more disciplined than me.
He wouldn't eat carbs late at night,
he would eat only, lean cuts and all this meat
and he would avoid processed anything
and I said to him Franko,
I said I gotta talk to you one night.
You're the most discipline person I've ever met.
He was probably 35 or something.
How long have you been disciplined?
He said well, for a long time.
I said how did you get so disciplined, most people
can't control what they eat.
He said, when I was young, I was fat.
And people made fun of me and they bullied me.
And I said to myself never again will somebody bully me
for my weight, so I lost that weight
and every time I wanna eat crappy food,
I think back and I conjure up the emotions.
See, humans aren't always logical we're emotional.
You're not motivated, you procrastinate too much,
I can tell you why,
you do not have enough emotional force
that you can bring to the table,
like my friend Franko.
And Franko said, the pain of not eating some junky food
in the moment, of having some self control,
that little bit of pain,
is not worse than the pain of people calling me fat
and bullying me.
So I have motivated myself
and I said, damn you did it right.
You did it right my friend, that's all I can say.
When someone says to you, you're broke.
Well ask yourself, are you?
If the answer is yes, go and start fixing it,
as best you can.
It will take some time, they'll still bully you,
but you know what, toughen up a little bit,
welcome to planet earth.
This is the world where 30 million people,
in India, 30 million kids are starving to death.
So I always find that people are offended,
they're only offended by things that affect them,
they don't really give a shit that much,
they're just like ah ah ah,
Twitter feed people trying to protect their little me.
And now, if you wanna be offended go be offended
at major injustice in the world.
Major injustice is what I feel like
we should be offended about.
Not whether we accidentally say Mexicans are good cooks.
Who cares?
If I put a list of the 500 biggest problems
facing planet earth, it ain't even in the 500 list.
It's not even 499.
We got erosion, we got asteroid hitting our planet,
we got global holocaust and starvation,
we got global warming or global cooling,
whatever you believe.
We got mass riots, we got wars,
there's only been like 30 years without a war
in the last 500 years.
We got issues with fuel in terms of energy
and depleting the energy,
we got issues with carbon, we got issues,
we got issues, we got issues with North Korea
and crazy dictators.
I ain't got time to go through and just make sure
nothing else offends me.
Why don't I spend my time on the big stuff.
That's what I always want to ask the people
who are too politically correct.
Why is this a big deal to you?
Why?
Africa right now, there is some lion
pouncing on some weak wildabeast,
are you offended by that?
No because some of it is the way of the world.
One of my favorite authors
and one of the wisest smartest people of all time
or our time for sure,
is a man named Will Durant,
he won a Pulitzer Prize,
he was a professor and he wrote a series of books called
The Story of Civilization, one of the greatest.
If I could own one set of books on a desert island,
it would be the Story of Civilization,
it's about 800 to 1200 pages, I forget,
I've read it multiple times since I was a teenager.
I was lucky enough somebody gave me an old copy of it,
I couldn't afford it.
It was like 500 and somebody gave me an old dusty copy.
I've read it over and it said one of the things.
He talks about the lessons of history
and he said, the second lesson of history
is that life is competition,
life is a struggle, not everything survives.
Some species will go extinct.
Are we mad that there's still not every dinosaur?
No, possibly the dinosaurs went extinct
because an asteroid hit.
Are we offended at asteroids now?
No cause it's the way of the world
because some problems are not preventable.
Some problems, you just gotta roll with the punches.
Somebody in your family or close to you
will probably get a disease in your lifetime
and if you're, what are you offended
at the microbe that caused it?
Are you offended at the virus?
No don't be offended.
You can use that fuel to come up with a cure.
Come up with a damn cure then.
Use it, devote your life to science and medicine then.
Devote it.
Use all that pain that you're offended
that you lost somebody close to you that you loved
or that you see millions of people dying of cancer,
you say, one day I will solve this problem,
that's the world I wanna live in.
See people who harness the power,
harness what offends weak willed people,
and turns it into game changers, life changers,
society changers,
epic people that will remembered throughout history.
See most people aren't going to be remembered
throughout history.
And part of it is because most people are too weak willed.
So next time you feel like pulling out
that big emotionally sensitive thing say,
is it time to balance out with a little toughness?
When you have a little kid,
when you have a mother and father
and you have two parents, whatever it is
and now I'm aware it's not always a mother and father.
I'm sure someone's offended about that.
But you know what I'm saying.
I'm talking like, do I say fireman, firewoman,
postman, postwoman, like if I accidentally said postman
or fireman, I know that women
can be just as good at this stuff too.
I'm just accidentally saying it.
So excuse me, I'm not perfect.
If you're so perfect with your language,
let me dissect your conversation
because I bet you I'll find shit
that you do wrong too.
Most people get offended by grammar.
Well let me tell you something about grammar,
why grammar in someways is important
and someways is a crock of shit.
Yeah I said it.
Because there's something called semantics.
There's something called semiotics.
Semiotics means the study of symbolism.
It's the same that people get offended when you swear.
Well look, swearing is not real.
As I told you about Freud he said pain,
a lot of pain is subjective, that we inflict upon ourselves.
If you go to China and start swearing at people in English,
they don't know what you're talking about
so you ain't hurting their feelings
but it's the same words so how come
when someone says it to us in English we get offended.
It's only because we understand it
and we attribute symbolism,
we attribute meaning to the symbol.
What happens if you just stop doing that.
Expand the mind, be powerful.
Now if this sounds a little crazy to you.
Well I am a little crazy
but I always remember what Albert Einstein said,
the thing about crazy people,
the thing about, how does it go?
The thing about some people is they sound crazy.
No how does this go.
Hmmm, I haven't even (mumbles) video, Wild Thoughts.
The thing about.
Oh yeah here we go off course.
The thing about smart people is they sound crazy
to stupid people.
So sometimes, for example I've learned
to toughen up my brain,
sometimes people go oh Tai, you've got crazy thoughts,
nobody's thinking like that.
I said yeah.
Sometimes they're right, sometimes I'm an idiot
but sometimes I'm ahead of the curve.
Sometimes I just say to myself well Tai, never forget,
the thing about smart people is sometimes they sound crazy
to stupid people.
Think about Galileo Galilee,
think about Martin Luther King Junior.
All these people who changed the world.
You wanna change the world,
sometimes people wanna call you crazy
'cause you're ahead of the curve.
So get used to it.
You know what happens to most revolutionaries,
go through history.
They get assassinated, almost all of em.
Now hopefully that never happens to you or I,
but it could.
Because when you stand for something,
people don't always like it.
Martin Luther King Junior was like eh,
black people should be able to drink at the same fountains
as everybody else.
Some people thought he was stupid saying that
but no, he was just smarter ahead of the curve.
And they were the stupid people,
he sounded crazy 'cause they were stupid.
He was ahead of the curve
and unfortunately he was assassinated,
JFK was assassinated.
Mahatma Gandhi was assassinated,
Jesus Christ was assassinated.
You go on through.
Indira Gandhi was assassinated.
A lot of people get assassinated, it's a crazy world.
It's a crazy world so,
while you got breath, while you got time,
use every force that comes at you for good or bad
to your advantage.
It's one of the reasons I like Jujitsu.
I do Brazilian Jujitsu under Machotos
and I've done some with the Gracies too
but the reason I do it,
is because it's called.
The word Jujitsu basically translates to the gentle art.
Someone comes at you with tremendous force,
you learn to use their force against them.
You see arm bars, you see things like this.
This is where someone swings at you,
they're exposing their arm.
They're sitting, if they're on top of you
and they're trying to punch you,
they reach too far and you use that power
that they have against them.
You put em on triangle choke,
you put em in a arm bar,
put em belly down arm bar,
right on top of you trying to hurt you.
And the reason you must do that is because
you can't always fight force with force
in the sense that some people are stronger than you.
It's the same what I was trying to say, emotionally.
If you try to eliminate all emotional criticism,
some people, it's too much, it's too strong of a voice
throughout your life, throughout your life,
hopefully you lived a hundred years old,
there's gonna be every year of your life,
people coming at you emotionally, verbally,
in a negative way.
Not constructive criticism
and so, you're gonna have to learn,
you can't just say, never happen to me,
and that's what I feel like Twitter people
and people getting offended are trying to do.
They're trying to go no negativity,
nothing bad in the world.
Well, that's not gonna happen anytime soon,
not in our lifetime, not in our lifetime,
no one's gonna fix the crazy gene
in our lifetime.
So what you learn to do is mental Jujitsu.
Like Brazilian Jujitsu but for the mind.
You take it and you harness it
and the stories I've told you about,
my own story and people saying
I would never know how to make money,
Franko, about people saying he's overweight
and using that to harness to be in the best shape
for decades of his life
or Arnold Schwarzenegger, using that, people actually
exposing his weakest legs so that people
would come at him and motivate him,
that's mental Jujitsu.
That's the real martial,
that's like Bruce Lee said.
He said you gotta be like water, water conforms to the cup.
If it's a big cup, it gets big,
if it's small, it gets small,
that's like Jujitsu, you conform.
When people attack you, you don't resist and say,
no one can ever attack me, I make a rule,
no one can ever, no road rage ever, no one.
My boss could never be an A hole,
no one could ever make fun of my body.
You could be doing, you can't do it,
that's not conforming.
You roll with it.
Someone makes fun of your body,
you use it to wake up and go, okay,
we're gonna do a little better.
You don't have to go frantic,
you don't have to listen to every negative queue.
I'm just recording this to talk about the opposite.
We live in a world,
we already know about political correctness.
I'm trying to give a little bit
of the other side of the story.
One of my favorite proverbs is that every person's
side of the story sounds good till you hear the other one.
See there's a lot of good going on in the world,
like I said of activism and people standing up
for disenfranchised groups whether they be gay
or whether they be black or Mexican or whatever,
there's a lot of good to that.
Off course there is.
But you also must look at the other side,
which is we're not gonna instantly stop it
so you gotta know how to deal with it
as it comes through daily in your life,
you gotta know how to deal with it.
Or what else are you gonna wait until the world
is fully reformed?
People have been trying to do,
there's been reformers throughout history
and it's still not done,
when do you think it will be done.
It's just a new thing they try to reform,
it never gets fixed.
There's always another idiot born.
Yeah I said it.
Someone's oh, Tai, what's an idiot,
don't we all know what,
if you don't know what an idiot then it's you.
One of my mentor used to say Tai
if you are sitting in a room playing poker
and after 30 minutes you don't know
who the sucker in the room is, guess who it is, it's you.
So when you're playing poker, keep your head up,
pay attention because people
are trying to make a move on you
because they want to take your money
and that's the name of the game called poker.
That's the competition in poker.
And you're not gonna ever fully take that away.
DNA in humans, the competitive urge,
ain't going away anytime soon.
And you don't want it to completely go away.
If you got rid of all competition
where would ambition go?
Competition and ambition are two wedded concepts
psychologically.
We'd have no sports.
You'd have, when you eliminate ambition,
you know ambitious people invent things.
They write books, they become architects,
they cure diseases.
Now they also do some messed up stuff,
they also start wars.
But I'm saying, you get one with the other
so you can't completely eliminate it,
or else you eliminate the human species
and you eliminate our psychology
and it's not gonna happen.
It will not happen.
DNA changes are tremendously slow.
Unless you put bionic and artificial brains into it
which may happen, sooner than we think
if you believe in the point of singularity but,
there are gonna be humans,
as long as we don't blow ourself up the planet
or destroy ourself or do something
or get hit by an asteroid,
have to go with Elon Musk up to Mars,
but even there we're just gonna bring the human gene
right up there anyway so, be tough, mentally.
Practice mental Jujitsu.
Next time somebody offends you or you want to be offended,
harness it.
Because at the end of the day,
those people whether you fight back,
they ain't listening.
So use it for something for yourself.
That's mental Jujitsu, okay.
Goodnight everybody.
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