Doesn't your father say anything about this?
I think he'd oppose this.
He has given up.
My older brother rebels against her the most.
He fought with her every day because of this
and ended up moving out 2 years ago.
Why did he move out?
- She threw his things away, too? / - Yes.
Let's meet him. He's next to your mom, right?
Nice to meet you.
Hello.
Did you really move out because of this issue
like your sister said?
No way.
I couldn't stand her throwing my things away.
So I moved out 2 years ago by getting
a part-time job and didn't get any help from them.
Didn't your mother oppose when you moved out?
I think she would've tried to stop you.
She didn't try to stop me at all.
She said "Move out. Do as you wish."
"That's what I want, too."
Maybe she said that because she was angry
that you didn't do as she wished.
Maybe that's part of it.
But she didn't call me for 4 months afterward.
I'm sure she was upset and worried.
So what happened in the end?
I got angry, too
so I decided not to call her either.
But in the end, I gave her a call
and said, "How could you not call me once?"
When was that?
A little more than 4 months after I moved out.
You're quite stubborn, too.
What did she say?
"No news is good news. Why bother calling?"
- She was quite irresponsible. / - I'm amazed.
Didn't you worry about your son?
Why live together when we can't get along?
He's an adult now.
A monk should leave if he doesn't like the temple.
So you don't care if your daughter moves out, too?
It's the same for her, too.
She's a grown-up so she can move out if she wants.
(Oh, my...)
You came out here because of the sunglasses.
What made your brother move out?
Why did you move out?
I grew up finding secondhand clothes
from the neighborhood clothing bins.
- Around the apartment. / - Because of his mom.
Your closet was a clothing bin.
(A funny but sad reality)
Did you ever find any clothes worth wearing?
Oh, these are nice.
I did find some clothes that looked fairly nice.
What did your mother throw away?
One time I bought a pair of jeans for $200
to wear them on my date with my girlfriend.
She threw them away?
I found out right before I was about to leave.
You should've run over to the clothing bin.
It was already empty.
Of course, someone took them already.
Because they're new.
People would love new clothes in a clothing bin.
I'm sure some people in that apartment complex
already wait for his mother to come out.
- Yes! There she is! / - I'm sure there are.
What else did she throw away?
When I was in the army, my girlfriend made
a photo album of us and sent it to me.
Oh my god!
She even wrote a letter.
I looked at them and sent them home.
My mom threw them away saying they're messy.
I couldn't tell my girlfriend what happened.
I heard that your mom even threw food away?
I like to take hangover drinks after I drink.
But they're never in the refrigerator.
Why would you throw food away?
The hangover drinks would have been new.
Does she drink them?
We sometimes order chicken and have leftovers.
It's gone the next day.
She often throws food away.
On my birthdays, I get cakes from friends.
Several cakes.
I once got 3 cakes and kept them in the fridge.
Mom threw them away for taking up space.
She's strange.
We have 3 refrigerators at home,
but all of them are empty.
You should throw the refrigerators away.
I hate it when my refrigerators are messy.
So when I open the refrigerator,
I like to see it empty.
What? You're supposed to fill it up.
Cakes block the view of the empty fridge.
Throw the refrigerators away then.
I guess she does like things clean.
What do you think?
I think mom is obsessive.
She turns the whole place upside down every day.
Every day?
Can you give us some examples?
Like cleaning behind the sofa?
She does that, too.
She likes to move the furniture around.
- She does? / - Often?
She does it until she's satisfied.
I had to move the furniture.
I would move the furniture around one week.
Then she says "I think it's better this way."
So I move them back.
Then she changes her mind again the next week.
So I just keep moving them around.
You did that every week?
Your place is like a moving center.
I did it because of the dust behind the furniture.
While I was at it, I wanted to rearrange them.
You can pull it out, clean
and then push it back in.
He's the one doing all the work anyway.
- Oh, my. / - You're lucky to have a son.
But he has moved out now.
Who does the work now?
I haven't been able to do it since then.
You don't ask your husband to do it?
He's too busy with work.
It's inconvenient that your son has moved out.
Can't you compromise and live together?
I thought about it,
but I don't want to change my lifestyle.
Don't you think you're a bit too selfish?
Yes. I admit that I'm selfish.
She always says this.
Everybody is selfish. I always come first.
She always says that.
Everybody is selfish. I always come first.
What if your daughter is selfish? Is that okay?
No, that's wrong.
What?
It's okay for you to be selfish but not her?
Why?
I know it's a contradiction,
but life is all about contradictions.
What are you talking about?
This is what I think.
She knows that she's selfish and
she has tried to change that personality,
but she can't.
She can't blame herself for it
so she's living the way she is now.
But she doesn't want that for her daughter.
I can tell that she knows it's wrong.
Is Shin Dongyeop right?
It's partially right.
But I don't want to change who I am.
When I first heard the story,
I thought she was being too harsh,
but now I think she's cool.
You're cool.
This is my territory.
If you don't like what I do, leave. That's it.
She's the boss.
What else does she do?
My mom likes accessories.
My boyfriend and I have matching rings.
She...
(Did that)
(end up being thrown away?)
She wears the ring herself.
(What is this?)
She's not cool. She's not cool at all.
She's totally cool. (I take it back!)
I have a ring
and it really looks good with hers.
So I wear her ring.
If you don't change now,
you won't be able to change forever.
My mom and I are going through the same thing.
She's over 70 years old and she won't change.
It always hurts me and causes us to argue.
I can't get closer to my mom.
I understand what you mean.
Tell me. I've been through the same thing.
You can tell me everything.
The reason I moved out is not just
because of her throwing my things away.
She's always right.
You can't talk to her.
She never listens to what I have to say.
I work at construction sites.
It would be nice for her to encourage me
by telling me to be careful or be safe.
She never does.
She says "What's so hard about your job?"
She doesn't like what you do.
She says "Let's see how well you do in life."
She hurt your ego.
Mom makes Donghwa and me
send her $1,000 each per month.
- For living expenses? / - Yes.
She said she would save the money for us.
I don't send her any money now.
But I did give it to her for about a year.
I don't know where all that money went.
I'm sure she didn't throw that away.
I've never seen a penny of it.
How much did you save up for your son?
I save $500 per month for each of them.
What do you do with the rest?
The rest is for me to spend.
Also, my daughter bought me a used car.
So I'm paying the monthly installments.
Ever since I was young,
I promised her that I would one day buy her a car.
One day, she told me that her car is too old
so I bought her a used car on an installment plan.
You're such a nice daughter.
You told her that you would one day buy her a car
and she told you to keep your word?
Yes.
How old were you then?
She always told me what kind of car she wanted.
- Your mom? / - Yes.
She's incredibly bossy.
- She's starting to look cool to me, too. / - Yes.
How much do you earn a month?
About $1,700 on average.
You give your mom $1,000 per month?
She takes more than half.
I trust that she's saving the money up for me.
We must talk about this here.
Your son said he's not paying you anymore.
You said you're saving $500 a month for him.
He's not paying me so I stopped, too.
Then what about the money you saved up until now?
I got it back.
You should return it to your son.
No, it's a payment for raising him.
If your son continued to give you money,
were you going to give it back in the future?
Sure. But since he stopped, I won't.
You heard you won't get that money back.
How do you feel?
I'm very much shocked.
I knew the money would be somewhere.
It's a payment for raising him. It's mine.
Donghwa continues to give me money,
so I'll give it back when she gets married.
So you're angry that your son stopped paying.
How dare you disobey me! That's what this is.
Sure.
Because of your tone, you seem a bit cold-hearted.
But I'd like to know how you really feel inside.
You may speak this way,
but you love your son and daughter, right?
Sure.
But you know that it is hard for young people
to earn $1,700, $2,000 a month these days, right?
Sure, I know.
What's mine is mine and what's hers is also mine.
Would you be happy if you're alone?
Without your son, daughter and husband?
No, I wouldn't be.
- You need your family then? / - Sure.
Then you should be nice to them.
I need them so I can be the boss.
Then what will you do if they leave you?
I think she's joking to be funny.
I think she got the wrong concept here.
That's not what her face says.
You don't truly feel that way, do you?
You're just pretending, right?
I'm not pretending.
It's true that I'm selfish.
I am a bit cold.
Your daughter is your precious treasure, right?
So why do you treat your treasure that way?
She's more important than your car, right?
She's the one who bought you that car.
I guess you're right.
If your daughter and son are obedient,
do you think that they love you?
I guess so.
But they might not really feel that way.
Don't you feel anything while discussing this?
Are you still adamant about keeping your ways?
I do think that I should change a little,
but it's not easy to change one's habit.
Everybody we meet in life is selfish.
But when we go home,
mom isn't selfish.
We can open up to mom and are glad that mom can
take care of things that I forgot to do.
But for her, she goes home and sees a selfish mom.
She has spent her whole day meeting selfish people
and she sees her selfish mom at home.
Then she can't help but lose her way.
There isn't a place for her where she can be
encouraged and feel love and hope.
You're not throwing away their things.
It's not just that.
You're ripping their hearts out at the same time.
Imagine that one day she gets fed up
and decides not to obey you.
Many years later, you will be old
and won't have the ability to earn money.
What if she decides not to help you out then?
That would be too tough.
What would you like to ask your mom?
Please don't throw away my things.
Please try to understand me.
I know you are dying to throw out
my stuffed animals and the letters from
my boyfriend who's in the army. Please don't.
At least wait until they break up.
Let's try to decide if this is a concern or not.
Why is it a concern?
This is just wrong.
Who else pressed the button?
Oh! I'm not supposed to press it yet?
I thought I was supposed to do it now.
I understand how you feel.
It's so frustrating that they can't talk to her.
I've seen many cases like this around me.
They miss their mothers, but
they get more upset after seeing their moms.
I hope it doesn't happen to you.
If you try hard, you can turn things around.
It's important to compromise with each other.
You're family.
I hope this program has helped you to change.
Press the button if you think this is a concern.
(What does the audience think?)
(Post any concerns you or anyone else may have)
(Log onto the TVUT application!)
Stop.
Would you like to say something to your children?
Thank you for growing up to be a good girl
even though I'm so selfish and eccentric.
I will do my best to discuss it with you
before throwing your things out.
Please say a word to your son.
The son that moved out.
I love you, son.
He smiled.
He smiled big.
Wait.
How old are you?
I'm 25 years old.
How do you feel about this big surprise?
I've never felt this way in my whole life.
Please say a word to your mother, too.
She even kissed you.
Look into her eyes.
- Look at her. / - Tell her your wish.
(He gets the courage and looks at her!)
(But it's too awkward...)
I don't express my feelings much either.
- You both need to try. / - Go ahead.
Mom.
(He courageously looks at her again!)
Mom, since you said you'll express your love more
from now on, I will try to do so, too.
You know that I love you, right?
Wire that money to my account later.
Please show us how many votes they got.
I wonder how many votes they got.
(It ends with 5)
(How many votes did they get?)
(They got 155 votes)
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