Evsei: Get ready to feel proud of me! I downloaded the most useful app in the world.
Check it out. Hello everyone! This is Heads and Tails Reloaded and we landed in Guangzhou!
[Chinese translation]
Nastya: Okay. I did not understand anything, but it sounds amusing.
I am sure that app will help you get through the weekend with $100.
You will stick it in people's faces and ask where the free meals and cheap rooms are.
Evsei: This marvelous coin will decide that. Heads!
Nastya: Tails.
Evsei: Nihau Guangzhou!
Nastya: How happy are you to get $100? Not so much right?
Evsei: Should I do my dance?
Nastya: Not while I am around please. In case he does decide to dance,
remove your children away from the screen. This is not a sight for the weak-hearted.
Believe me! Now, if you'll excuse me.
Evsei: I hope this thing knows how to beg for spare change.
Can you spare some change?
I am helpless.
This city is all over you even if you have never heard of Guangzhou.
You dress in Guangzhou and use Guangzhou's gadgets and furniture without even knowing it.
This weekend we will reload the world's counterfeit goods capital.
The last time we were in Guangzhou, we realized that a tourist from abroad has a major problem –
no one here speaks a word of English. Cabbies don't.
Neither does hotel personnel.
Regina: One person. I need bed. You have room?
Evsei: Not even personnel at the airport. Do you know how to get to the city? The cheapest way?
Without money. Good thing that I downloaded this translator app on my smartphone.
You say a phrase in your native language… What is the cheapest way to get to the city?
…And it translates it to local and vice versa. Isn't that cool?
That was Chinese. What is the cheapest way to get to the city?
Not even a translator can help. I have little money, but I need to get to the city.
App: Next year I will take you to your end.
Evsei: Let us try it the other way around.
App: I am your first.
I am your first. I do not object. It is going nowhere. That was not optimistic.
A young Chinese girl finally understood what I needed after I struggled
to get any kind of help for good 30 minutes. Is there a subway here?
Girl: Yes. Yes.
Evsei: Okay. Tada!
I finally got the gold card which means that I am about to get an awesome ride! That is a Range Rover!
I have never had a Range Rover in the history of Reloaded!
What is that? This is some Land Wind! Behold Land Wind – a Chinese knockoff of Range Rover Evoque.
You might think that this is a real thing if you squint very hard –
the body silhouette, headlights, flatbed look the same. Yet Land Wind costs three times cheaper.
The makers of Range Rover have tried suing multiple times for plagiarism, but to no avail.
Well, shall we try riding in it? I hope it does not smell like cheap plastic.
Yep. It does.
Land Wind is the Abibas in the world of autos. A car aficionado would tell you
that this car does not have a four-wheel-drive like the original. It has 163 horsepowers instead of 240.
The interior is cheap leatherette instead of calf leather.
I am just a girl, so I like this large white car.
Not bad. Not bad.
You have to cross an entire airport in order to get on the subway.
The terminals remind me of futuristic space movie decorations.
Very awesome and space-age! This has to be the coolest airport that I've ever seen.
There are no token sellers in Guangzhou subway. Everything is automated.
The most advanced Chinese use the special app. They scan a QR-code with their phone,
apply it to a tourniquet and the money automatically transfers from their account.
It is a bit harder for a tourist to do. Oh! English! Third branch. Destination – Tiyu Xilu.
The price of a fare depends on the distance. The price to Tiyu Xilu is seven yuan. That is a bit over a dollar.
Here is the coveted token! Shall we?
Where is the slot? I want to drop my token!
Am I supposed to just touch it? Wow!
Seriously?
Everything in Guangzhou subway is thought-out to the smallest detail. I will not get lost here.
Even floors feature direction arrows. A cop monitors the security from the top of a stepladder.
There is no way you can fall under the train because it arrives inside of a glass tunnel.
Its doors and the doors of the train open simultaneously. They will not steal your wallet in Guangzhou subway
because there are security cameras everywhere. Do not film me Olezha. The police are already filming me.
Five million people ride Guangzhou subway every day. Therefore, everything is tuned up so it can work
without missing a beat. Should even a smallest delay occur,
it will result in the traffic collapse of the entire city with 15 million people! My station is coming up.
What? Where do I go?
You have to save your token until the end of the ride. In order to get out you have to drop it inside this slot.
I came to an unknown Guangzhou and this place is on par with N.Y.C.
I have never been to New York; I just always wanted to say that.
Buildings that scrape the sky and screens the size of a five-story building! All that is missing are the flying cars!
I do not remember seeing skyscrapers as tall as these are. I am in utter shock. I think they are poking the sky!
Ping! Ping! I mean they are really tall! Can somebody explain to me what is the reason for that?
Unbelievable and also a bit scary. Who is paying for all of this?
Where did Chinese get the money for all of this luxury?
I will give you an answer for the Chinese – the trade provides Guangzhou with its riches.
There is no oil, natural gas or gold to be found, but they produce kilotons of mass consumption goods here.
Abibas, Gussi and Fuis Vuitton. I bet you never thought that every time you buy a knockoff,
you add a new brick to another Guangzhou skyscraper.
Guangzhou attracts tourists because of the cheap stuff. Will it be possible to purchase cheap smartphones,
tablets and other modern-day amusements?
They do not sell knockoffs at cheap markets in Guangzhou.
Entire mall complexes are filled with labyrinths of isles.
This is heaven ya'all!
Holy Mother! This is like an Eldorado for a freeloader. They sell thousands upon thousands of
every kind of fakes.
You can find the latest smartphones here. This is original?
Vendor: Yes. Original.
Evsei: They sell some of the goods before their official release date.
An original iPhone costs around $1,000 while they are pushing them for $200.
I have not seen so many Vertu phones in their official store. These cost $500
instead of $20K that you would pay for the original.
Ultra new gaming consoles. Nintendo Switch? Oh, really? How much it costs?
Vendor: 1,980.
Evsei: 1,980. That is $300! About 1.5 times cheaper than what they charge back home.
You should not get too excited though. A Chinese knockoff is a Chinese knockoff even in China.
This fake iPhone has a 2-megapixel camera. Vertu has crystals instead of real ice.
Cameras are prone to a matrix problem. A pirate console will surely lag often,
but many are willing to take shortcuts to stay on top of the trends.
Phones, tablets and laptops that are really cheap! I do not even know what the half of those devices was!
What is that? I have no clue at all.
Lenses for smartphones. Anything that can be plugged via USB cable –
electronic clocks, lights for a perfect selfie, 360-degree lights, DJ setups, floating globes that spin in the air,
fans with clocks, air humidifiers, interactive tables and the best seller! This is not an ordinary microphone!
It has a built-in karaoke with a speaker! What? You do not have to plug it to anything! Charge it and sing!
It has a remix button! Awesome!
Massage? Ten bucks for a massage pillow. I cannot say it feels comfortable.
A massage slipper for different body parts. This one is for the heart, shoulders, ears, eyes, neck,
anus, appendix and genitals.
The flying minion amazed me the most.
This is super cool. I found a drone with built-in infrared sensor for 50 yuan. That is not easy to do. That's yours.
The law prohibits counterfeit production of the global brands.
What is supposed to happen now? There are underground showrooms though.
They do not sell Gussi or Dulci Gabbana. They sell fakes of the highest quality.
Our celebrities even started a trend – shopping for fakes in Guangzhou.
What do you expect? You are supposed to dress according to your status, but the wallets are not endless.
Fake clothing is so yesteryear. Chinese have learned how to create fake furniture.
My shopping guide will provide the assistance. He is fluent in Chinese
and can help me to get the goods delivered. Am I right?
Sergei: Of course. You will never hear a word "No"!
Nastya: Anastasia.
Sergei: Sergei, nice to meet you.
Nastya: Nice to meet you. Shall we thrust ourselves inside this furniture adventure?
Sergei: Anything for you.
Nastya: Let us roll!
Sergei charges 10% from the amount that you spend. Who buys this furniture?
Sergei: People who would like to save money. If a celebrity has the guests over,
they would not tell that the Italian furniture is in fact from China.
Nastya: How much cheaper are the fakes?
Sergei: Ten times cheaper.
Nastya: How can you tell which furniture is original?
Sergei: It is very difficult because the workers are the same. The machinery and materials are the same.
It is very hard to tell visually. The chandelier just hangs there. No way could you tell.
You could probably tell by the leather on the couches, but it is super hard.
Nastya: Tens of thousands of dollars' worth of magic happens here.
Let us take a regular sofa produced at a Chinese factory and make it into a designer couch by Versace!
Well mates, they have it all in here – Fendi, Bentley, Versace. The originals cost lots and lots of money!
We are talking millions! These on the other hand cost only around a few dozen thousand.
If I did not know that chair was Chinese I would totally believe that it was the original.
Versace! Versace! This one is mighty.
I do not want to know the price of the original.
Each piece of furniture, pillow and stool looks like a work of art. Expensive art at that.
Now for our main feature – the golden toilet. I have heard that people get these,
but I have never seen one with my own eyes. It really is made of gold too. This is not the paint.
This is 24-karat gold. My question is – how much of a golden person do you have to be
to purchase a golden toilet and sit on it with golden intentions? A throne of all thrones.
In case you are thinking about purchasing this model, they cost $84,000.
Let me remind you of a fact that I am a girl, I know my Cartier! These are any girl's most coveted jewelry pieces!
They cost a ton of money! I know how astounding those rings and bracelets look! Gentlemen and ladies!
A Cartier sofa?
Say what?
Queen Anastasia had found her throne at last! I can afford this couch with my gold card,
but traveling to the next city with it on an airplane could be a little problematic.
I will take the chair instead.
As the old Chinese proverb goes – you can eat anything that flies or swims besides the moon and its reflection.
You can find everything that swims at Hai Bao Market.
The fish market usually offers cheap and interesting food. Guangzhou is just a collection of sea vermin.
Anything you can get out of the sea – sea stems, gigantic Rosenberg shrimp,
mantis cancer and even contraband crabs from Kamchatka.
What is that?
Vendor: This is really good.
Evsei: Yuck! Is it dead? Do you have to kill it? No. No. No! Dude I will only buy it if it is dead.
Holy shit! That thing is alive! This creature looks like a trunk of a baby elephant. This is Geoduck.
Mollusca that can live deep in the sand for up to 140 years! Geoduck is a favorite Chinese delicacy.
They believe that it gives "man powers". Therefore, it is not cheap – $43. No. Take it. Too much.
I wanna try something special, but I have really low money. What is that? How much it costs?
Can you say that?
"Let us go have dinner"? What does he mean? I do not have much money.
'Free'? What do you mean?
This guy wants to treat me to dinner if I eat it with him. I hope he is not implying anything.
These folks realized that they cannot make money off me and went to eat dinner.
I do not know if they were serious when they invited me to come along.
They sat me at the traditional spinning table, poured some tea, gave me salad with lotus' root,
shrimp and sea stalk satay. Chinese came up with a spinning table
so you would not have to ask anyone to pass the food. The moment of truth – Su Mei fish.
We know it as Napoleon or Humphead wrasse. It is a very large and bright coral reef fish,
but that is not why Chinese like it. They admire it for the very tasty meat. One kilogram of it totals in $200!
It is hard to believe that they asked me out to a dinner where the main dish costs 1,000 yuan.
Chinese use the entire fish. They used the fins to make the soup. It tastes like boiled calamari with spices.
Second dish – steamed Su Mei with sweet and sour sauce. The fillet is here! It is also boiled.
I thought they would be frying the fish.
I did not understand the meaning of "melts in your mouth" before today, because it is like sugar.
Only salty. It is very soft indeed and dissolves in your mouth in the matter of seconds.
There are plenty of expensive hotels in Guangzhou, but only this one has an Extreme Wow Suite!
I cannot wait to see what that looks like. I hope that you are also anxious.
W Hotels is a luxury hotel chain owned by Marriott. It is generally marketed towards
a younger age group and boasts a modern stylish interior design.
Sorry.
That is impressive! I'll be damned! It is huge! The suite is very confusing.
It feels as if you are inside of art piece at an exhibition. Unbelievable!
Holy mackerel!
Is that
also
my suite?
It is if it opens.
Really? Oops. Sorry.
I think I rented an entire floor. Why not make a huge room just for the sake of having these two stones?
Oh well. Let them be. Why not?
Good evening. Glad to see you as well.
For one guest? I honestly feel out of my element here. It so gigantic and I am so tiny…
Honestly, it feels uncomfortable.
I think I finally found a cozy spot in this huge suite.
Evsei: Let me tell you why looking for a cheap hostel in Guangzhou is the most common touristy mistake.
Here is why. Hello.
Receptionist: Hello. Are you here for the spa?
Evsei: Yes. What are the conditions?
Receptionist: You can spend 24 hours in our spa for $38 per person.
The fare covers different lounge rooms as well as dinner and breakfast.
Evsei: Can I sleep here?
Receptionist: Oh yeah.
Evsei: Like really sleep?
Receptionist: Yes.
Evsei: Sounds perfect to me!
Spas are very popular in Guangzhou. They look like true palaces here!
Gigantic shiny hall with a white grand piano in the middle. Leather sofas with plush velvet pillows.
Staircases with gilded banisters. All of this luxury for me – a guy with a hundred bucks.
For the next 24 hours I will have access to the gym,
Turkish hammam,
bathhouse on firewood
and baths with different temperatures.
Too hot!
I am sincerely sorry about showing my butt a lot lately. It was not my initiative. They made me do it.
You can play videogames while sitting in a velvet chair, play pool
and challenge a Chinese person to a game of ping-pong.
I do not know about you Nastya, but I think I have just been crowned!
I could eat noodles or rice in Guangzhou, but when I found out that they have a snake restaurant here,
I could not stay away. The duty of a host obliges me to try it. Food in China is more than just food.
It is a true attraction for those who like exotic thrills.
Their menu is alive. This is how it looks like. The restaurant entrance is a crawling, hissing, scaly hell.
I feel kinda bad, but I am choosing the meatiest, priciest and fattest one. I think it will be a cobra.
I want to apologize to everyone who is sensitive about these things,
because I remember when Ptushkin ate a crocodile and octopus. We are in the country
where this is considered normal. We simply have to try it. Really.
Not everyone would be able to watch what happens next. They select a snake for you,
throw it in the bag and weight it in front of everyone.
It only takes a second to decapitate the snake with scissors.
They then drain the blood into a glass with water and rice vodka.
I saw it. Then they cook the snake. They cut it open from neck to tail and remove the entrails and skin.
Then they chop it into pieces and fry it.
You might think that Chinese are cruel, but they simply believe in eastern medicine.
To them every snake is like a pharmacy. Snakeskin mends the eyesight. Heart improves the immune system.
Blood is good for potency.
It looks like fried fish and smells great. The fried snake is the least of my problems.
I am disturbed by that snake's blood.
Well. A toast to youth!
How should I put this? This is not a tomato juice. What does blood taste like?
You might have tasted your own blood when you cut the finger. It tastes salty. It is also really thick.
The consistency reminds me of tomato juice.
Time to taste the meat.
Surprising. It tastes just like chicken. When you fry it especially. Tastes like chicken wings.
It would be a perfect snack to have with a beer. In case you're not that into blood vodka.
After they ate and bathed Chinese go to sleep right here.
Dear sophisticated viewers of Heads and Tails, it is hard to surprise you with a Chinese tea ceremony.
Besides, Zhanna already told you all about it detail.
Zhanna: The objective of the tea ceremony is putting a person in a state of light trance.
Feels like some sort of meditation.
What if you combined a tea ceremony with martial arts? Wanna know what would happen? Follow me!
There was tea in there.
This is not just a pretty dance with a kettle. This art was born in Sichuan province many centuries ago.
These eighteen moves combine dancing with kung-fu. Once upon a time, there lived an Emperor.
He also drank tea of course, but you could not approach him.
Hence, they were pouring his tea from a respectable distance using these kettles.
Nowadays this looks like a show. The times are different, but it still looks spectacular! Wouldn't you agree?
Great job! Right on the mark. Right inside the cup.
The flow is pouring out! Unique. The long nozzle allows the tea to cool off and become rich with flavor.
You can drink it right away without fearing of burning yourself.
Can I give it a try?
Have a good teatime.
When Chinese do not have something, they begin to produce copies.
There is no sea in Guangzhou so they made a counterfeit one – a beach in Liwan Lake Park.
Hello guys. I need a pair of swimming trunks.
How much?
0.5? It cannot cost 0.5.
She must mean 50 yuan. Glasses?
Sorry, but 90 yuan is too much for me. These are just generic Chinese shorts. It says "sports".
It is not even a fake Adidas.
Speak English?
I get it. Deluxe quality.
Okay, I will give you fifty for everything. These gals gave me a discount and offered me a deal on pool tickets.
These tickets cost 40 yuan at the entrance. Here it says 25 yuan, but she is selling it to me for 30.
That is 10 yuan cheaper. Why not save a dollar? They purchased a bunch of tickets at a discounted
wholesale price and began selling them at a markup.
Is it good? All right.
Nothing goes there?
Thank you.
Behold the Chinese version of the Maldives!
Golden sand, azure water and sunbeds
According to statistics, only 2% of Chinese know how to swim. That is why their pools are so shallow.
The deepest point is one meter low so that no one drowns. Great news for a person who cannot swim.
I am ashamed to admit that I cannot swim.
Look! What is that? He is swimming! A Chinese person who can swim!
That is like seeing a Superman!
I have to introduce myself to him and his mates.
Evsei.
Will you teach me how to swim?
Boy: It is easy. Look, you move your feet like this.
Boy: He is doing it wrong. You need to move your arms differently.
Let's go. I'll show you. Hold on to this and swim like a frog.
Honestly, that is not how our frogs swim.
Let us go over what we learned. Put your hands together, control breathing and kick like a frog.
Evsei: Did you see that? I was swimming! Two meters! Without any support from the rubber ring or that dude!
I think I learned how to swim ya'all!
You cannot leave Guangzhou without seeing a Chinese wonder – Chimelong Paradise!
An enormous amusement park that also features a zoo and a circus! What are we waiting for?
Let us burst on the scene with all of our might! Let me change my shoes first.
There! Much better!
We are in the Screaming Zone!
F**k. F**k!
Going with my head upside down did not feel good at all.
That was quick, but so mega awesome! I wish I could go again guys!
Safari Park is the second area. Animals do not live in cages in Chimelong Paradise.
They reside in their natural habitat. You can look at them while riding a miniature train. Charge!
This safari is pretty neat, because you ride on a cute train through the pretty park.
The animals and birds are very close. There are rhinos, packs of elephants and herds of giraffes.
Then I began to get worried. Not for myself. For the children of course.
Open cars ride right next to real killers – wolves,
lions
and tigers!
The animals are nice and there are many of them, but we are going so fast that
I can barely focus my attention on anything. Very frantic pace. Moreover, this speaker is too loud.
They installed a cable car system for those who did not see the animals aboard the fast-moving train.
I prefer this format, because you are in the car by yourself, the air is fresh and
I will see absolutely everything. You can see panda's house from here.
Wildebeests discuss the latest Heads and Tails episode with zebras.
A much better view of the elephants from here! That is what I am talking about!
After you have seen enough, you can head to the feeding area and feed the fish. They use pacifiers to feed them!
Just like infants! Come to Auntie Nastya my scaly fellas! Come to Anastasia Vyacheslavovna! Quickly!
It is dinnertime! Drop your toys and coloring books. Time for dinner!
Vasya you will eat first because you are the most responsible. I said Vasya gets to eat first!
I feel like a fish kindergarten teacher! No pushing! We have enough for everyone!
People who are bored with feeding fish head towards the rhinos
and crocodiles. Here kitty.
Can I get my rope back? He is gonna drag me right in!
A first trip to China is unimaginable without a visit to a traditional massage parlor.
If you do not go to an expensive spa, but come to a local joint like this one
you can afford it even on my tight budget. Hello. Nice to meet you.
Masseuse: Welcome!
Evsei: So, you make massage?
Masseuse: Okay. Yeah! Massage! With fire!
Evsei: Fire?
Masseuse: Fire.
Evsei: I think he meant to say that they will light me on fire!
Chinese have been using fire as medicine for thousands of years. With it they heal osteochondrosis,
rheumatism and headaches. It burns the fat and even cleans your aura.
A pillow with a hole.
Masseuse begins to rub your body very thoroughly. Sensitive! Hot! A couple of my ribs might be cracked.
Oh yeah. Keep hitting me on the head just like that. Fifty shades of grey is kids' stuff.
This would be heaven for a masochist.
Then they cover you with a towel. I am beginning to worry. What is going on there guys?
Can someone tell me what is happening? They soak the towel with a special elixir that contains alcohol,
peppermint, chamomile and St. John's-wort.
Masseuse: When you feel hot, show the hand.
Evsei: Show the hand? Then they flambéed you like a chicken.
It started! Holy smokes! It takes ten seconds for your body to warm up before the towel catches fire.
Holy shit! It is scorching!
Masseuse: Okay. Finished.
Evsei: Finish.
Masseuse: How do you feel?
Evsei: Boom.
Last but not the least, the cherry on top – the circus!
Awesome!
The stuff they pull off is incredible!
Chimelong is not a classic Chinese circus. This is the circus we all remember from our Soviet childhood.
Chinese circus does not usually feature clowns. This one does! Chinese circus does not usually feature animals.
Here they have a bear riding on a motorcycle! Chinese do use the safety ropes. These artists do.
Perhaps it is for the better. There are barely any Chinese working here. Mostly artists from the former U.S.S.R.
Their show looks fantastic and intriguing. I think I am falling in love with this performance.
To find a bottle in Guangzhou take a stroll along Xingu Road. Turn right after the first billboard
towards Nail Art of Homemade Town building. Our bottle is hiding near a gas pipe under the building.
Best of luck!
Guangzhou seems like a city full of Robin Hoods that take from the rich and give, well, sell to the poor.
You can blame Chinese for the fakes all you want,
but those are the very reason why even a bum can live like a king for a weekend.
Nastya: This is incredible ya'all! Here I am, sitting on my own throne in the middle of Guangzhou
like a real Empress! Yet for some reason I am waiting for another host.
Evsei: I am here! This thing is sweet!
Nastya: Howdy! Get off! Stand there. This is a throne!
Stop embarrassing me! Get on one knee! I am the Empress. Hello! Here is the best part – I drank blood.
Evsei: What a shocker! You drink blood from the entire filming crew on the daily basis.
Nastya: Which is true! Although, this time I did drink the real snake blood.
Evsei: $100 will get you through in Guangzhou just fine if you are smart. I got a massage. I lived in a five-star hotel.
I basically chilled like a king.
Nastya: We will see you in the next city friends. Bye-bye.
Evsei: Bye-bye.
Nastya: Where are you off to? Who do you think is gonna carry the throne? Let me give you a hand.
There. You can carry it now.
Evsei: Of course, I can. I am still young.
Nastya: What did you just say? Be careful with it! You're gonna rip the cloth!
He said he's young! I will kick your ass! You better run! Run! Who are you calling old? You pest!
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