Please do not attempt to perform any of these stunts
or activities in this show.
They are super dangerous. Crazy, wild dangerous.
The stunts seen are either performed by professionals
or under the supervision of professionals.
Serious professionals.
This show also contains bad language.
♪♪
Wow, there she is. Holy Jesus.
Man: This is insane. Insane.
All right, watch out, son! Got it!
Holy shit!
Oh, my God!
Thing is unreal.
Like, what is that? You don't grind down that.
Fuck, yeah!
[ Speaks indistinctly ]
Aah!!
[ Whistle blows ]
♪ Raw oysters, Texas Pete ♪
♪ Sea urchin on the reef ♪
Welcome to King of the fucking Road.
Aah!!
Fucking battle. It's a fucking war.
Three teams of top skaters battling it out
to accomplish amazing stunts and challenges.
Now I know what it feels like to be married.
This year, we have Creature...
Riddled with excitement.
...enjoi...
I don't know.
...and Deathwish! Fire it up, boys.
They go from city to city...
Where are we going?
You ever gonna tell us where you're taking us?
...for 13 days, documenting every crazy trick...
Man: Oh! ...and bone-crushing slam.
♪ Fresh Lactaid from my teeth ♪
♪ And surely it's right and meat and cheap ♪
I'm so sorry to my girlfriend's parents.
God, this is fuck.
[ Laughter ]
Man: Got shot in the nuts!
♪ Sea urchin ocean's skeet to you ♪
♪ Oh, baby! ♪
[ Whistling ]
Yes! Holy shit! That was insane.
We love you!
[ European accent ] Look at me! I'm right here!
Roy: When the dust settles,
the team who's done the gnarliest stunts
is gonna be crowned...
King of the fucking Road!
[ All cheering ]
I love it.
♪♪
Man: Fuck yeah.
"King of the Road," season two. We're back.
Roy: Yeah!
Fuck, Jake!
We're gonna do the big meet-up at Alamosa Skate Park
and get all the teams together for some special challenges,
give them the book, and get this thing started.
You got Jake Phelps and Andy Roy.
Those guys are gonna help host.
Rev, rev, rev!
It's fun having them for these challenges
because it makes it also a challenge for me
to even run the goddamn thing.
This is skateboarding 101. This is what it is.
All the rest of it, suck my motherfucking dick.
SMD, right, Andy?
That's right. Always.
Well, I can dig.
You got any weed?
If it all falls apart, we'll just kind of fake it
like that's what we meant to do.
We got this, Jake! We got this!
I got that. Yeah.
For this season, we're starting fresh
with three brand-new teams.
♪♪
Aaaaah!!
Aah!!
Deathwish skateboards,
they're the team known for the hard partying,
"most drunk, most stoned, jumping off shit" team.
However, in the last few years,
some of their greatest perpetrators of intoxication
have totally gone sober.
So much coffee.
I'm about to fucking flip out, man! Fuck!
When you think of Deathwish,
you definitely think of Mike "Lizard King" Plumb.
For Satan right here.
Beagle: He's totally hijinks,
so he'll do anything crazy or obscene.
So, we got that covered by the King.
Burnett: Just a nonstop ball of energy.
King: When it first started, it was pretty wild.
It's, like, me, Ellington, Greco, Antwuan Dixon.
Whoo!
Trips were fucking so chaotic and wild
and, like, dude, they were --
sometimes it was almost life threatening.
I don't drink anymore, I don't party.
It's a fucking beautiful change.
How you guys doing? Glad you're here, man.
Yeah, fuck. I'm hyped, man.
♪ Congratulations, honey ♪
As far as our team goes, nowadays,
we have a fucking heavy-hitting posse, dude.
I hope we win.
It's gonna be fucking crazy.
We just got Jake Hayes on the team.
He's kind of a powerhouse.
♪ If you found somebody ♪
I don't know how he does it, but he can just levitate.
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
Hayes: Like to see what the book's got to offer.
Let's fucking do this shit. Let's go.
Next up, from Chicago, we got Neen Williams.
Neen's known for having the best heel flip in the game.
♪ As glad as I can be ♪
He's on a total program of fitness
and positive living.
Instead of always chasing the party,
you know, I just make my own party now.
[ Laughs ]
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
Oh, that's right. Fucking hey.
No fucking mercy. Hell, yeah.
This is your -- It's a war. Remember that.
♪♪
Burnett: We got Jon Dickson, the quiet attacker.
He's, like, the big dude that has the best style.
You just see it when he's skating.
He just looks angry, and it's awesome.
He's just about to break down
any wall you see in front of him.
Last but not least, Jamie Foy.
'Sup?
King: The biggest handrail on the planet
is like a little flat bar to him, and he's fat.
He's fucking epic, dude.
Nobody's ever seen a skater built like this on a handrail.
This guy looks like he should be playing college football.
People tell me, like, they're stoked that I'm, like,
a wider-set skater that doesn't match the body type.
Like, you can just do whatever.
If you want to do it, you can do it.
♪♪
He just goes extra fast 'cause he's got all that weight.
He is gonna give those guys an advantage for sure.
♪♪
Creature is here. Yeah!
Creature Skateboards is a legacy brand
that's been around for a long time.
You guys sleep in the graveyard last night?
And with David Gravette on the team,
I know that they're gonna be really going for it this time.
[ Scream! ]
David Gravette, they call him the baby lamb.
If there's big stairs or big rails,
David Gravette's gonna be the one to do it.
He's an emotional skater.
That might be one of my biggest fears leading in,
is trying not to act like a complete maniac.
'Cause it's definitely in my M.O.
when I'm in the middle of trying a trick
to have a four-hour complete meltdown.
Fuck this! Aah!!
There's no fucking reason!
David Gravette's been on "King of the Road" twice.
Funny story -- he's the only guy to ever get the dreaded
"King of the Road" face tattoo.
As far as "King of the Road,"
you couldn't get more passionate,
and he's gonna be going for it
more than anybody else on this team probably.
♪♪
Hitz: We got Willis Kimbel.
That's an intimidator, for sure.
Willis is gonna handle all the transition stuff for us.
Burnett: Willis is kind of a renaissance man.
He does a little bit of everything,
and I think he's gonna be kind of a team leader
with these guys.
That brings us to Sean Conover, Thin Lips.
They call him Thin Lips 'cause he doesn't have any lips.
Thin Lips, Burn Victim, Gary Busey Jr.
Quale: He's, like, such a talented, amazing skater.
As this thing goes along, his skating will speak
for the exact reasons that he's here with us, you know?
Next up on Creature, we got Kevin Backle.
Kevin Baekkel.
Backle? Baekkel.
The Norwegian Hammer. [ Chuckles ]
What's your name? Kevin.
Kevin, where you from? Norway.
We're gonna nuke that place next. Pbht!
♪♪
Kevin Baekkel -- possible secret weapon this year.
Kid's a beast.
I'm the first one from Norway ever to do "King of the Road."
Be sick to go home and go back to all my friends and stuff.
Fuck, yeah!
[ All speaking indistinctly ]
The muscle! The muscle!
Burnett: Then we have Chris Russell.
They call him the Muscle.
19 years old, crazy-eyed transition animal.
He's got no girlfriend. He's on the road.
Think he's gonna be living it up.
♪♪
I'm really nervous, guys. I'm not gonna lie.
Just be yourself, Ben.
And last, we've got the fun-loving boys of enjoi.
These guys were about having fun,
bright colors, the cartoon panda.
It's a kinder, gentler, sweeter side of skateboarding.
Roy: You guys ready for this?
You guys better trip it up, man! This is a war!
This isn't, like, hugs and fucking kisses.
This is the battleground right fucking here.
Muscle it up, right? All right.
Yeah.
Burnett: Louie Barletta,
he's the Dick Clark of skateboarding,
the terminal teenager.
Nobody knows how old he is.
No, dude, I wish I was, like, 37 again.
I've been with enjoi since the beginning, I guess,
so I guess that makes me the old, crusty dude.
I don't know. [ Laughs ]
Burnett: Enjoi started as a team of best friends,
and in the last few years,
some of those key people have faded away from the company,
and Louie, who was always just a pro skater,
has become the man in charge.
There's a lot of weight on his shoulders with this thing.
He's got a lot of new team riders this year.
This is gonna be kind of a test of their new lineup.
I think we're, like, the oddballs here, you know?
Like, everybody else is so gnarly, and I don't --
I don't feel like we're gnarly.
I was trying to get the dudes gnarlier.
I was like, "No more light beer.
We're gonna drink, like, Jack Daniels, all right?
We got to be gnarly." [ Laughs ]
♪♪
Next up on enjoi, we have Ben Raemers.
He's the likely lad from England.
He can skate a little bit of everything.
Definitely good on transition.
Raemers: I don't even know what's going on, to be honest.
I'm just kind of clueless about everything that's going on,
so I'm just gonna kind of see what happens.
Burnett: Ben Raemers has a certain naivety about him.
He's often shocked by some of the things
he encounters in America.
You stop at a supermarket,
and you might lose fucking two hours 'cause Ben's like,
"Mate, I didn't realize peanut butter's from peanuts!"
Yes, Ben. You're spreading peanuts on your bread.
"This is amazing!" Like, he just invented it.
Burnett: Next up on the team is Zack Wallin.
He's a beast, man. Just full blue-collar.
He skates at like 100 miles per hour.
He ollies the fastest
and furthest out of anyone I've ever seen.
He's a beast.
Whoo!
New on the team, Jackson Pilz -- "Jacko."
He's basically the best skater in Australia right now,
but most people haven't even heard of him.
Wallin: I came to America like three weeks ago
for "King of the Road," so it's just been a big buildup
of pretty much every emotion so far.
Just nervous, excited, scared.
Burnett: If anybody is gonna turn the enjoi team
into a serious force,
it's gonna be Jackson 'cause he's so good.
Are you a rider, too?
Yeah.
Better start stretching, yoga,
whatever the fuck you can do, buddy.
Get out there. You got the shirt on.
Enjoy your day.
Burnett: Last but not least on enjoi is Enzo Cautela,
their secret weapon.
♪♪
That was fucking insane! Yo, Enzo!
Burnett: Enzo is 19, originally from Las Vegas.
I guess being the only flow rider
does put a little bit of pressure on you to,
like, kind of outdo yourself a little bit.
Burnett: We found out about him at Thrasher
because at our big Bust or Bail Triple Set contest,
he showed up, he kind of looked like the Unabomber.
He had big prescription sunglasses on,
and we were like, "Who is this guy?"
Next thing you know, he does a hard flip down the triple set.
Cautela: I think it's sick how, like,
Axel went amp for Toy Machine after "King of the Road."
Man: Like to welcome this guy to Toy Machine.
That's, like, definitely
something I'm shooting for, so...
Are you in there? Yeah.
You gonna make this? Hell, yeah.
You better fucking make it. It's "King of the Road."
This is where you get the chance. You know what?
You might be pro, blood.
Hell, yeah. Stick it.
You got to give it all you got.
Roy: Next on "King of the Road."
♪♪
Oh! Fuck me, dude!
Whoever built this ramp is fired.
♪♪
You hit it.
Phelps: All right, we need the teams all set up on the stairs.
Everybody, welcome to Thrasher Magazine's
King of the fucking Road.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Fucking war!
This is the ultimate cross-country road trip.
We got three teams here.
The Creature team.
Spooky!
Over here, Deathwish.
Ooh!
And over here, my favorites, the enjoi team.
Anyway, one of you gets to win.
And when you win, you get 50 grand,
you get the trophy,
and you get the most prestigious real estate
in all of skateboard media,
the fucking cover of Thrasher Magazine.
[ Cheers and applause ] Fuck, yes!
Andy, take it away.
All right, you guys ready to do a fucking challenge?
So, I want you guys to get the fuck up and follow me,
and let's go check this shit out.
This is amazing. So good.
All right, you guys. Slingshot challenge!
I'm gonna need one dude from each fucking team.
The longest ollier you got.
Then you got two guys that are muscle
that are gonna slingshot the motherfucker
without pushing as far as you can.
100 points right here, you guys.
We're starting at 12 feet!
Come on, let's get this shit!
Aaaah!!
Fucking get it!
Fly, Baekkel, fly!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Get it, Zack!
Boom! There we go. There we go.
That's a make. That's a make. That's a make.
♪♪
We never bare any.
You need focus, homey. You need to focus up.
Fly, Kevin, fly!
[ Cheers and applause ]
We got to fucking bring the game, right?
20 fucking feet! 20 fucking feet!
What you got?
Andy, lie down in the middle.
Come on, Jake.
Come on!
[ Cheers and applause ]
All: Ohh!
The wheel went through the fucking thing.
Look right there.
Fucking shit.
[ Laughter ]
Hey, we're gonna switch it
so you guys don't have to fuck the wall.
You're gonna chuck it if you hit the hole.
Might as well fucking land it.
Leave it, right? Leave it. Leave it.
-I'd leave it. -Yeah, leave it.
No touchy. No touchy.
Give our guy one solid shot, dude.
There's a hole! Watch out!
Where?
The hole's just on the left.
This one's for Valhalla.
Valhalla. Valhalla.
All right, here we go. Let's do this, ready?
Oh! Fuck me, dude!
Fuck!
Goddamn it.
Dude. Leave it. Are you good?
Was that your hand or your head?
Holy shit.
I did not think that was gonna happen.
That was ruthless. Sorry, buddy.
Roy: That's a fucking winner right there.
♪♪
The sound his body made when he hit the ground,
I was like, "Oh, my God."
[ Thumps ] Oh!
Hitz: Whoo, that was a meat bag,
carcass toss, and fucking extra curricular.
Yeah, you guys, would've been hospital time for me, for sure.
Yeah, fucking that was it, though.
I fucking landed it.
Oh!
Phelps: All right, we're gonna give 50 points each.
Three-way tie. You guys -- All you --
You guys all muscled up.
You guys all fucking put the hammer down.
Gravette: That is horse shit. Our guy should've won.
He's all right? Hell, yeah.
He's okay? He's a skateboarder.
Hell, yeah, he is. Champion.
-Champion. -Wow.
Dude, I knew that was gonna happen, too.
As soon as I saw that hole.
All right, everybody, we're going over to the bowl. All right!
Ladies and gents, the bowl.
♪♪
We hired the professional ramp builder,
and he built it out of particle board.
For our last challenge here today,
this is probably our most ambitious to date.
We're gonna have a relay race.
We got four stations throughout the park.
The first one, the bank to wall.
One guy from your team
needs to get a frontside grind on that thing.
You will high five your next guy,
who has to do station two, the double set kick flip.
When that's done, you'll meet me over
by the three at the U-pipe.
Then you tag your final, fourth, last guy,
which is we're just gonna get it out of the way now.
You got to drink your own pee.
[ All cheer ]
Son of a bitch.
I'll just piss right in my own mouth. Fuck it.
I'm not gonna be able to pee
if Andy Roy's trying to look at my dick, either.
You guys ever drink your pee before?
Of course, right? Normal. How about you girls?
You ever drink your own pee?
Tasty.
You guys are the pee pee drinkers?
Yeah. Real strong yellow is gonna come out of me right now.
All right, everybody!
We got guys for station one.
Willis, the big Liz, and Louie for enjoi.
And then I assume the pee drinkers
are on the other side.
All right.
On your mark, get set, go!
♪♪
Phelps: Hey, you guys better rev this shit up.
Burnett: Get it! Get it!
Yeah!
We're good!
[ All speaking indistinctly ]
Enzo! Here's the kick flip.
Roy: Fucking get it!
Oh!
Burnett: We're good! Creature's good!
Let's see it.
[ All shouting ]
Jacko!
Oh, he's good! He's good!
Yeah!
I got one more. Conover bailed at first try.
Yeah!
I mean, I don't need to piss.
Enjoi was so far ahead.
They were like, I don't know, a minute ahead,
and then Benny boy got stage fright.
Raemers: I can't pee!
Man: Go! Go! Get it, Foy!
Yeah! You're good! You're good!
Whoo! To tail! To tail!
Yeah!
Go, go, go, go, go!
Occupied! Occupied!
Man: Fuck!
I don't even know if I can go piss.
Fuck!
Burnett: Luckily I was there, because our pee judge, Andy Roy,
got so excited, that he was around the back
trying to pee in a bottle himself.
Andy! Andy! Andy!
You didn't see him. Did he drink it?
Drink it! Chug it!
Hey. Hayes did it first.
I'm so sorry to my girlfriend's parents.
[ Retching ]
Dude, I'm still pissing. [ Laughs ]
Damn. Quickest piss in the west.
Hey, Raemers, you need help?!
Raemers: Got it.
Hey, I'll help you!
That's good. Chug that motherfucker.
Drink it. Hurry, drink it!
Look this way! That way! Drink it!
Down the hatch! Ahh! There you go.
There you go.
Ugh!
Oh, my God. Fuck.
Sorry, boys, I fucking couldn't pee.
I can only drink a little bit of pee.
Gravette: I don't know if anyone noticed
how fucking yellow that shit was.
[ Slo-mo ] Drink it! Drink it!
Roy: Next on "King of the Road"...
Time to unleash the fucking bible. Fuck.
And the fucking book.
Oh, my God.
Fuck you, Burnett.
Jesus.
♪♪
All right, you guys, everybody want to get in close?
I'm gonna get the team managers up here, please.
We're gonna hand out the books.
This is their companion for "King of the Road."
They're filled with challenges, and they go from city to city
trying to earn points by accomplishing these tricks.
At the end, the team with the most points
is crowned King of the Road.
Craig: It's just a wild time.
It's fucking all the craziness
wrapped up into one thing stuck in a van for two weeks.
Time to unleash the fucking bible. Fuck.
Yes.
The fucking book.
Barletta: Let's see. What do we got?
[ Laughter ]
360 flip wearing women's high heels
at least three inches.
Oh, no. Frontside grind
while riding your board on top of another.
Oh, my God!
Barletta: Get Lil' Wayne, Tyler the Creator,
or Danzig in your van.
Man: Holy shit. Jesus.
Fuck you, Burnett.
Nice.
Dude, wear a pair of dolphin shorts three days.
No other leg coverings may be worn.
Who wants to knock it out right now?
What is this, the Lucas -- the Lucas boy challenge, dude?
You got to wear the fucking chubbies for three days.
Lucas Puig, he's a French champion.
He came out with a video part this year
wearing shorts shorter
than we had seen since the dolphin short
heydays of the 1970s.
Like, "ball popping out the side" shorts.
Here we go. We're making a fashion statement here.
It's just my new style, basically.
They're backwards.
Does it even fucking matter, dude?
These things are ridiculous.
Hey, it's a good thing I have some nice calves, all right?
That's all that matters.
So, what's up with these?
Do I got to shower in them, too, or...
You got to jack off in them.
[ Laughter ]
Let's start fucking doing some of this shit.
Okay. Let's go.
Perform a trick on oververt.
Right here? Should we just start right now?
Yeah. Might as well.
Let's do it. Grab your boards, dudes.
Let's do this. Yeah.
So, finished the initial challenges,
and we're at the same park.
There's an oververt here.
We can get some flat ground done,
so just gonna try to bang it out,
not waste any time.
It's good, dude. Everyone's fucking pumped
other than Ben...'cause he had to drink his own piss.
♪♪
Yeah. We got it.
Rolling handstand.
First points in the book right here.
Ho-Ho plant! Yeah, Louie! Check!
I'm not a very competitive dude, but James is very competitive,
so I'm, like, telling James, like,
sometimes just step in and just be like,
"Hey, dudes, we got to do this,"
'cause I'm gonna be so lax about everything.
I've been on "King of the Road" one time before.
2007 with the Blind team.
And we won, which was awesome.
Raemers: James Craig, who's team managing the trip,
he is like a humongous legend.
He's like, "You got it."
That's like, "James Craig just said I got it.
Oh, my God. I've got to try and do it now."
Craig: Hey, 50 points is perform a trick on oververt.
Man: Here we go! Here we go! Here we go!
Check!
Jackson dolphin flip. Look at that. Boom!
[ Cheers and applause ]
Yeah, baby!
Pressure flip to late shove-it.
[ Cheers and applause ] First try!
First try!
-Yes! -Wow!
Holy shit!
Yes!
Yeah, right in front of the bosses, huh? Craig: Yep.
We just want to show them we're serious about it.
We're not all fun and games here.
♪♪
Is there anything about tits?
No. Do we have to make a sign for tits?
Show your tits? I got tits.
Thorpe: We're in Albuquerque, and we just got the book.
It's pretty gnarly.
Jake, are you quitting those shoes?
Yeah, definitely. Got to do it for the team.
I was gonna [bleep] standing like this.
-What the fuck? -Like, "Ahh."
That's gnarly.
'Cause I can aim it like that.
Yeah, true. Goddamn, you're gonna aim that shit.
One of the challenges is to stand in a tree
and take a shit on an old pair of shoes.
Oh, yeah. So fucking gnarly.
It's good, huh? All right, let's get it.
Let's fucking get it while we can. Okay.
Beagle: Not only do I film, but I'm kind of a counselor.
When these people are gonna have a meltdown and lose it,
I try to bring them back to their Zen,
be like, "Dude, it's okay.
Take a deep breath.
You can do this."
They are fucking troupers, dude.
All: Oh!
Jesus Christ!
Beagle: Yes! He did it! He fucking did it!
-Yes! -Oh! -Dude.
[ Laughter ]
So horrible.
Yeah, Doug.
Both: Boo, boo, boo!
Yeah. Yeah!
You're dropping bombs, Lizard.
Roy: Next on "King of the Road"...
I'm sending them their first city challenges.
Aah! Fuck! Fuck!
Fuck!
First city challenge is tight, dude.
♪♪
-Yes. -Whoo!
Backside kickflip in with a bonus kickflip out.
Gravette.
Yeah!
♪ Waking up from a dream where I die ♪
♪ When I finally found ♪
♪ Somewhere to sleep for the night ♪
That was fucking it. 20 points?
20 points for that? That's fucking stingy, dude.
♪ No blade of grass is ever someone's ♪
Oh! I could've fucked really bad.
That book is pretty goddamn sadistic, Burnett.
A lot of people just don't even want to do this,
'cause it's sheer brutality on the road.
♪ Scannin' the streets in the night ♪
Man: Fuck, yeah!
Russell: Looks like I took a shit in my pants, dude.
I don't know, I think we're, like,
we're running probably, like, what 600?
-We're running around a G. -Or a G.
Probably around a G, then.
If he doesn't fucking rail that shit off the cliff.
Are you dead-ass serious?
This is, like, actual circus tricks about to go down.
That was a scary one.
[ Cheers and applause ]
♪ Empty sky all in my head ♪
Boo, boo, boo!
Yeah, Jake!
♪ Sleep for a week, hoping I ♪
♪ Find my own life ♪
Burnett: There's this photo when I was a kid,
and it was Mark Gonzales doing an air over the hip
at Helbow, spike shot it,
and he's holding the board not with his hand,
but with a mannequin hand,
and it's just always stayed with me,
and through the power of mail order,
I found a place that sells mannequin hands,
and I'm delivering the challenge onto the team.
Yeah, Jamie!
Aah! Taah, taah!
Hey, you guys ready? We got our first challenge.
The city challenges are worth the most points,
and that's what kind of runs the show
as far as the dudes moving around.
Got our city challenges for Albuquerque.
Two skaters perform simultaneous tricks
over the hips at the ditch. 100 points.
Team with the best tricks wins an extra 50 points.
Let's fucking hit it. It's about 20 minutes out.
Everybody get in. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go.
♪♪
Burnett: Albuquerque is known for their ditches,
but you got to be super careful.
If you see any water, you got to stay away,
'cause they can be super dangerous.
King: This place is epic.
It's just a land of ditches and rough, gnarly stuff.
You all right? Yeah, you?
Yeah.
Aah! Fuck! Fuck!
Fuck!
The foot landed sideways on the top.
That was so sick.
First city challenge is tight, dude.
[ All cheer ]
Yeah, boys.
Yes, boys.
Burnett: "King of the Road's" a competition,
but it's still skateboarding,
so it's more about what you can do
as a team versus who's better than who.
At the same time, it can get weird.
Man: Let's go. Fuck these dudes.
Wallin: They sabotaged the spot.
Deathwish filled it with dirt,
so we got to do a little labor work.
Whoo! You got it, brother.
Man: Here it is.
Ah!
Ohh!
[ All cheer ]
Yes! Challenge completed.
Yes! Throw it up, throw it up, throw it up.
Should we fill it back up with dirt?
No. Come on, man.
Crew is killing it already.
-Keeping it going. -Yep. Keep the hype alive.
Look at this guy. He's about to skate right now.
Oh! You fuck!
Dude, this is gonna be such a miracle
for us both to land this.
[ All cheering ]
Fuck, yeah, guys.
That was insane.
Roy: Next on "King of the Road"...
Let me see it again.
-It's a baby bird. -Bird seed.
Quick, someone give me some piss to drink.
♪♪
Lu! There's Daniel.
Daniel Lutheran. There he is.
Burnett: Today, Deathwish gets to meet up
with Albuquerque's favorite son, Daniel Lutheran,
who you'll remember from last year's
"King of the Road" on Toy Machine.
Lutheran: I love these guys.
The Deathwish crew always hooked me up.
I've traveled with them quite a bit,
and me and Jon live right by each other,
so we've always been hanging.
Should be nice. Should be a nice,
family moment here in Albuquerque.
[ All cheer ]
Man: Bang, bang.
♪ You think you've heard it all before ♪
♪ Well, here's once more ♪
Cheers.
Oh, my God!
That was gross!
[ Laughs ]
Doing good so far, first day.
Doing pretty good.
[ All cheering ]
Wow!
Barletta: Oh, shit.
Oh, fuck, that is their van, isn't it?
Yeah. Who's is it?
Deathwish. Is it?
King: Hey, there are other teams here.
Oh, no, we got enjoi here.
Don't tell them we got any tricks either, dude.
I like the other teams.
I mean, I'm, like, a fan of all skating.
You guys want to tag me in on this one.
But, like, if it comes down to it, I'll fucking...
[ Laughs ]
♪♪
Man: Oh, that's it!
Wow! You're good.
[ All cheering ]
Oh, my God! Yes!
Oh!
Whoa! Yeah!
All you have to do is do it on flat ground.
Enzo ollied up onto something and then primo'd.
Makings of a true pro.
Enzo's the only dude who hasn't really toured with everybody.
He's been on enjoi flow for a few years.
This is kind of his shot.
Like I said, everybody else is so tight on the team.
He's kind of the outcast,
and it's like this is the trip to the tournament.
Like, does he fit in with everybody?
How does his personality mesh with the team?
-That was amazing. -Enzo!
Burnett: The piggyback board challenge.
I don't know if this is possible.
It's just some dumb shit I made up.
Man: Jesus Christ.
And that photo, that's fake. I Photoshopped that.
Right here, brother!
Ooh.
Barletta: Holy smokes.
Be careful. Be gentle.
[ All cheering ]
[ All cheering ]
Jackson just rifling off the fucking ledge tricks.
Barletta: Three of them, dude.
Yeah, baby!
Boom, boom, boom. You did it!
Yes, dude! Fucking "A."
You're just scaring those dudes now.
Jackson, dude, you were fucking ripping.
We've gotten a pretty decent amount of challenge.
I mean, we're sitting on a few hundred points in a day,
so doing good. Good pace.
♪♪
Man #1: No way.
Man #2: What are you doing?
Doing a pack of gum and a pack of peanuts at the same time.
It's that sweet and savory, dude.
Oh, my God.
Should we just do a transfer and count that as grossest eat?
Do it!
All: Yeah!
That's the grossest thing, dude!
You're a fucking genius.
Let me see it again.
Do it. Just do it.
[ Laughter ]
It's a baby bird.
[ Laughter ]
All in. Scarf it down.
-Get it! -Take it down.
[ All speaking indistinctly ]
Oh, my God, dude!
Get it in. Yes.
Quick, someone get me some piss to drink.
[ Laughter ]
Roy: Next on "King of the Road"...
You're gonna eat it with the shell?
-You have to. -You have to.
That's disgusting.
[ Laughter ]
♪♪
Sharon: Oh, my goodness.
Oh. [ Laughter ]
-All right, all right. -Yeah.
Welcome. This is my parents' house --
Greatest place on Earth.
This is where the magic happens.
King: Daniel Lutheran's family is the ultimate skateboard host
when you're here in Albuquerque.
You can do anything you want here.
I call it the no judgment zone.
We have a very outside-the-box family.
They're the family you wish you had.
All right, everyone get over here.
I want to see everyone's canines.
Let me see. Lizard's got a little canine going.
It's hard being a lizard.
His mom's, like, so cool. His dad's the shit.
They're the nicest, happiest family you'll ever meet.
The Deathwish guys who've actually stayed there
before are gonna return the favor
and throw a barbecue for the Lutheran family
and spend the night.
We figured you guys like steak.
Oh, yeah. We like steak, too.
Neen, the chef, he killed it.
He just makes the most elaborate meals.
It's amazing.
So, we got the potatoes in the oven,
then we'll throw on the steaks.
Got some crab legs right here Jonny boy just prepared.
When we have about 20 minutes left,
I'll start doing the batches of asparagus.
And yeah, we all did it.
It's gonna be good.
Man: Go shotgun it.
King: You're drinking pee one minute,
and you're having a barbecue with Dan Lu's mom the next.
You're gonna eat it with the shell?
-You have to. -You have to. That's the challenge.
[ Laughter ]
[ Whistles ]
-Yeah, Neen! -That's disgusting.
♪♪
Back to the park where it all started.
Looking for some more points.
Gonna knock some more shit off that fucking book.
-All right. -I got a pedicure on first try.
Here we go.
-Yes! -Holy shit, man.
-Holy cow. -One shot!
That's that and a Wiffle ball bat.
Yeah, muscle.
-Right here. -You got this shit, Enzo.
Man: Ooh. You okay?
Oh! Dude, it's so close.
Just one of those ones
where you got to put your foot on, too.
I know. I know.
[ All cheering ]
Yes! Yep.
Congrats.
Fuck yeah. Thanks, dawg.
I think he just ended us on a big spin
front board shove it out, which was 50 points,
so we ended on a banger today.
I don't know. I kind of had just a bland or slam mentality.
Like, I'm just gonna commit, and if it works out,
it works out, you know?
[ All cheering ] Damn.
Man: Coach him through it, D.L.
Lutheran: Coach him?
I mean, we all have different pain.
You got to channel your inner pain.
That's honestly what I did.
Burnett: Last year, Dan Lu made a pretty big impression
on a lot of people when he was able to tap into his inner pain
and really weep openly in the van.
I told you. I got headphones,
I got Guns N' Roses "November Rain,"
and I channeled that shit.
Hey, everybody, think about your shortcomings.
Here we are.
I think I'm about to have a tear.
Have one.
Man: Wait, you got one. Can you see it?
[ Laughter ]
-Yeah, Jake. -Yes.
-What were you thinking about? -Just my chair.
Oh, God. [ Laughter ]
I'm bummed to not be going
with these guys on the whole thing.
This little taste of it, I'm like, "Oh!" Feels good.
Lutheran: Feed the Beagle.
-That is one -- -Oh!
Advice -- Just keep going. Truck along.
You'll think you're getting
close to something, but you're not.
The book is long, and good luck.
Try to stay sane.
That's all I got.
It don't get much better than this right here.
[ Chuckles ]
On the next "King of the Road"...
Burnett: They thought they got off easy last night,
but today is where they pay the fiddler.
This isn't even safe.
Fuck!
No, it's not.
All: Ohhh!
Love you, Dan Lu, but this is crazy.
Today we have Breaking Rad.
Fuck! Sorry.
Over it, man.
Check!
-Fuck! -Sorry, man.
-I'm trying. -Dude, don't say sorry, man.
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