GIVE ME DAT GUCCI PURSE YO
AHH! YOURE NOT MY REAL DAD AND YOU NEVER WILL BE
DUN WORRY
MY GIRLFRIENDS HERE!!
oh shit crickets
HERE YOU FUCKING GO THIS IS EMBARASSING
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so hello I haven't filmed a video for YouTube for
I don't know at least three years so if I seem like I'm really awkward or feel
like a bit of a dick it's probably because I do so so now I'm going to film
a video on how I do my everyday makeup firstly I don't wash my face but you
probably should you also should probably tone your face and moisturise but if you've
got children you probably don't have time for that so the most my skin usually gets a
quick wipe over with a baby wipe and that's if it's lucky so the first thing I
actually normally do is take my foundation which just happens to be a
really expensive one I think I paid about 30 pounds for and it's not that
great it's NARS all day luminous weightless foundation it's actually not
that bad it matches my face which is pretty rare when it comes to foundation
my skin is basically...I look like a corpse most days
colour wise its great everything else is a bit shit to be honest I find that when it's on my face it goes
really cakey and like you I feel like it slides off my face I'm trying to use up
and because I can't be bothered to go into boots or debenhams or wherever to
buy another foundation and spend about half an hour trying to find one that
matches my face to get it home time and it doesn't match my face I'm just using
this so what I do I just squirt a bit on the back of my hand use normally about
two pumps and then it's too much and then I feel bad for wasting it but if I
put too much on it's like cake city on my face. I use this brush to buff it into
my face this is the expert face brush by Real Techniques pretty good I've had it
about five years now it's something like that and I rarely ever wash it and it's
still great so top marks there
once it's set I take this really knackered old concealer which is
probably about 5 years old as well and needs chucking out umm it's the
collection 2000 lasting perfection something or other all the letters have
worn off but it's from boots and it's about four pounds and it's the best
concealer that I've ever actually tried although I'm not sure that it really
cuts it these days because there's not really a concealer that can cover up
seven years lack of sleep but yeah I take this and shove it on everything
that the foundation doesn't cover which is everything basically once I've
applied it on my face I then take this beauty blender which isn't an actual
Beauty Blender it's a cheap ripoff version of a Beauty Blender but anyway I
take this and I then pat the concealer into my skin
once i've blended the concealer into my face I then go for contouring and I'm not a
hundred percent sure how the hell you contour still I've watched various
tutorials and I just don't get it to be honest
right to contour I use this knackered old thing which is hoola by benefit it's
broken because Lily likes to take it out of my makeup bag and then throw it
on the bathroom floor and stamp on it...this is why I can't have nice things
to contour I do actually use a contouring brush by Real Techniques but I seem......
Bloody car... right to contour I do actually use a contouring brush normally but for some
reason I've misplaced it...so I'm going to use the same brush I used for my
foundation which is the expert face brush and just hope for the best
now I know you're supposed to contour your nose somehow and I have no idea how to really do it so I
just kind of wing it and hope that it doesn't make me look like a nob
I think I'm doing that wrong I just don't seem to be able to grasp how you contour
it's different for every face shape you have and I don't even know what face shape I
have so someone please explain it to me
I kind of get how you do the highlight but with the contouring *weird exasperated noises*
*clicking like a weirdo to make syncing the audio easier* Hope you're proud Ben.
once I've done the dark stuff...I'm out of my depth here...I take this
highlighter which is really technic it cost about two pounds off eBay. I'm not really
sure whether I should be highlighting my face because I generally look like I'm
half dead most days but what you gunna do. For that I again use a specific brush but I can't
find it which is basically my life so I'm going to use this brush which is
actually blush brush
it's slimy Lily likes to take all of my makeup things out of my makeup bag
I don't think I really want to know why it's slimy to be honest
this highlight is okay. It's really hard I feel like I have to like ram my brush in there to actually
get the product onto it but it's like 2 pounds so I can't really complain
*whispers* I don't know what I'm talking about
I feel like I'm squinting through this entire video but I have lights everywhere and
it's so bright and I'm light sensitive anyway so I know probably end up with a really
bad headache after doing this video when I used to do videos I used to use
natural light and the colour was just horrible and Ben is a media filming
whatever guy so he gets really annoyed with me when I don't do things properly
so I'm doing it properly this time but it's blinding me and my eyes are killing
I don't actually have anything specifically for eyebrows anymore
because I seem to have misplaced that...you can see a recurring pattern here
I used this eye shadow palette by Urban Decay it's the first Naked palette and I've had it for years and
it's looking a bit worse for wear to be honest but I use the colour buck which
doesn't really match my eyebrows but I can just about get away with it and when I've got
two seconds in the morning then .... I take this angled brush from Real
Techniques all of my brushes are from real technique yes do you have some
random brands but I just really like these
I always hate doing my eyebrows, when I was eight I fell downstairs I hit my head on a
vacuum cleaner and have a scar right through that eyebrow and it never grows right
they always look really odd
once i've filled in my eyebrows I take this
brush by Real Techniques I can't read what it is...I'ts always awful when you go to
read something you can't read it and you feel so old
okay right is the accent brush don't actually know what it's for
I guess it's for accents... are my eyebrows accents?...Who knows
I've just got concealer all in my fucking hair ...okay I take this brush and I just go around
the bottom...I find if you haven't had your eyebrows done you can kind of hide
certain amount of regrowth with concealer so as a bonus
sorry if I'm annoying everyone from spinning on this chair but I can't not spin on
a chair that spins, who can not spin on a chair that spins...my camera decided to mess
around so I just had to get Ben to re focus everything and now I've forgotten
where the hell I got up to and shut up! now I remember why I stopped filming
YouTube videos just so annoying everything around you you have to make
it quiet and cars drive past and it's just ...
everywhere now all over my camera and my Mac oh well let's just carry on
I just got concealer in my brow now fuck my life I'm not going to be able to call
this a tutorial am i it's going to be watch Georgina fuck up doing her makeup I
don't even have the excuse of children Lily's asleep and Eloise is out there
with Ben so I just suck stuff ... When I've done all of that rubbish I get this which I
can't read the colour on the back because it's so old and dirty but I
would imagine it's the lighter colour it's by Mac, I use this brush which
is actually a lie I normally use whatever brush I managed to grab off one
of my children normally Lily and run to the bathroom to try and do my makeup on
my own which is never so that's a lie as well but today I'm going to be using
this brush which is the powder brush again by real techniques... and I've just got powder everywhere
and I take it and just shove it on my face really
and hope for the best
actually tip when I'm doing my powder I do try and get as much
powder as I can on my eyelashes because I find that when I put mascara on it holds better my
eyelashes are really long and straight and annoying probably the worst eyelashes
possibly have to try and put mascara on but if I put powder on them they tend to
not look so shit so quickly so once I've done that I curl my eyelashes with this which
is by Shu Uemera I don't know if I'm saying that wrong
I'm probably saying wrong but I got this years and years ago and I've never
changed that little thing and so it probably needs changing
I've also cleaned it about once because I'm rubbish the trees with it first one I've
ever tried normally whenever I have eyelash curlers they break within
seconds but this is lasted a good four or five years so it's not broken yet so
it's got to be good to hasn't it... I literally can't find anything to this
video I had everything all set out and I took a photo for it and now I can't find anything
the mascara I'm using at the moment it's this one it's by Chanel I spent about 30
pounds on it... be quiet!...it's by Chanel makes me sound posh
*whispers* I'm not posh
it cost me about 30 pounds about four years ago really I probably should have
chucked out by now because it's looking a bit grubby and half dried out I actually find
mascara works a lot better when it's half dried out I don't know why is that just me
probably just me
I just fucking stabbed myself in the eye with my mascara wand
one why is this going to shit I try to make a tutorial video and end up fucking absolutely everything up
okay last but not least is this which is again a really old lip
balm I should probably chuck some of this out but just the thought of going
into a shop and trying to find new make up is just urgh anyway this is by Barry M and
it's nothing special really I mean it kind of puts a bit of a color on your
lips kind of like a light pink colour it smells amazing that's the reason I use
it because it smells bloody amazing and I love it but yeah any lip balm will do really
why am i dropping everything!? I think I think I've
remembered everything I probably haven't because I forget my kids names most days
but from my face it looks about how it normally does when I put make up on
umm I do sometimes put eyeliner on but I am so crap at applying liquid liner iI used to be really good at it
in college I used to put on glitter eye liner and like really bloody vibrant colours
andI looked a right prat and looking back at photos I was just like oh my god what the fuck
was I thinking I tend to avoid that because otherwise I'm there
for about half an hour just fucking it up more and more and then I eventually have to take
it all off and then I mess all the rest of my make up up, sorry this wasn't more of a
tutorial that was actually what I set out to do but I ended up fucking it up
which is kind of an accurate depiction of my life in general so I don't know
like hope someone likes it... no wait every makeup tutorial has to have the
awkward posing at the end of it, okay, brace yourselves
okay that's enough anyway I hope you liked my video...eh...I can't think of an
outro so...
Why is it so fucking complicated?!
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