*Aucune intention de violer des droits d'auteur. Cette vidéo est destinée à l'amusement et aux défis intellectuels*
*Tous les liens pour la musique et les vidéos sont dans la barre de description ci-dessous*
*Aussi, Mouki n'y peut rien si son rire est énervant. Apprenez à composer avec.*
Hello everyone! Chandāga here!
And welcome to Chai with Chandāga
Mouki: Welcome to this 5th episode of Chai With Chandāga
Étoile: Today, we concocted for you 10 Bollywood movie theories
Contrary to Disney movie theories swarming the Internet, there are few Bollywood movie theories
"Does Aladdin counts?"
In general, if you're watching carefully Bollywood movies, you can hardly make up theories
Why?!?
Whyyy?!?
Étoile: So, we racked our brains and we found 10 interesting Bollywood movie theories
Here we go!
Number 10
[Devdas (2002) trailer]
In Devdas (DEVDAS REFERENCE), Kalibabu took revenge on Parvati because she pushed his advances
Kalibabu (Milind Gunaji) is Bhuban Chaudhry and Parvati's (Aishwarya Rai) stepson.
As everyone knows, Kalibabu is a randy man who's attracted to the courtesan Chandramukhi
(Madhuri Dixit)
Let's take a bet.
If he doesn't come before this candle burns out, you'll wear these ghungroos and dance for me
I accept.
*pervert smile*
And he's jealous of Devdas (Shahrukh Khan)
Because Chandramukhi isn't in love with him, but with Devdas.
"I'm dying of love for you"
Even if you gave love a bad name
But he also showed a little fondness for Parvati
who then repeled him.
During their first meeting, you might have noticed that Kalibabu touched her feet as a sign of respect
However, we can see he caressed it
He then says it was a pleasure to touch her feet, and she answers, while pulling his hear...
That it was a pleasure to punish him.
Kalibabu swears he'll remember this offence
And Parvati reminds him of their family ties (And so, he took revenge)
Since she pushed back a man, Parvati's character is pretty forward thinking...
But a relationship between a stepmother and a stepson shouldn't be romantic (nor tolerated)...
What do you think about it? Tell us!
Number 9
[Dil To Pagal Hai Trailer]
In the movie Dil To Pagal Hai, Ajay was scared to marry an unfaithful wife
Of course, we're not talking about Pooja (Madhuri Dixit),
She's very loyal, so loyal that she'll refuse to an idyll with the man she's in love with
Because she's Akay's (Akshay Kumar) fiancée *SUPER HAPPY*
Who went to work, in a foreign country
No, we're talking about the other women!
Because, yes, the other woman could crush poor Ajay's heart
In this movie, the characters aren't that old, and Ajay is always busy travelling
with... his business. We don't really know about it
His only work is to sign contracts, travelling and receiving cheques
He could be a diplomat or a merchant, nobody knows.
Anyway, Ajay is looking for love because he's in a steady financial situation
And he talks to Pooja about his numerous (imaginary?) girlfriends he meets abroad
And finally asks for Pooja's hand
You're in love?!
*confirms*
Come on, it never lasts with you
You'll meet someone else next week
No, this time, it's your type of love
You mean... marriage-like love?
Really? Who's the girl? Do I know her?
You know her very well.
Who's she? Tell me, please!
*nope*
- Should I tell you? - Yeah!
Forget it.
Hey!
But... we should ask ourselves
While he's this busy with his work, where'll he find time to take care of his family?
Because, let's not lie, Pooja's only job, at the beginning of the film, is to run in fields.
What will this Maya do? Will she work? Dance? Sing?
- Maya dances, but not like you. - Meaning?
Maya dances for herself
They need money.
Our theory is that Ajay wanted a wife who could be absolutely faithful
Since he always has to travel
As we said earlier, Akshay Kumar's character was kind of a playboy in London
Because London equals liberty, liberty equals mini-skirt and libertine girls
In the Bollydictionary
Because everything outside India is an ode to libertinism
Please refer to episode 3 of Chai With Chandāga for more details
How could Ajay have travelled with a rakish girl alone in his house?
She would have cheated on him as soon as he would've took his flight
He needed a good spouse. An Indian girl in saree, an housewife, a mother.
He wanted to be sure she'll be home when he comes back.
Pooja was the perfect match.
Unfortunately for Akshay (Ajay), the clothes do not make the (wo)man
No..
Since Pooja in kurta will jump in Rahul's arms
But then, he'll turn to the strong, the independent, the emancipated Nisha!
In jeans.
All tastes are in nature
But we can guarantee you that Nisha is totally faithful, since she loved Rahul until the last minute
Number 8
[Udi Teri Aankhon Se clip]
In Guzaarish, the lawyer DEVYANI DUTTA** (Shernaz Patel) was secretly in love with Ethan
Devyani... I swear...
You're the worst lawyer of India
And the best friend in the entire world
According to us, one of Bhansali's masterpieces is Guzaarish. It's poetic, simple, moving
And the Hrithik-Aishwarya jodi is... marvelous.
What a tragedy, Sofia!
On the floor, I couldn't see a thing
Your skirts are like tents
The day you come with a mini-skirt, I'll walk again
Ethan's character is really interesting
He's a strong and vulnerable man who can't use his body, but he's really smart
Tetraplegic for 14 years, the deposed magician Ethan realizes his life is a burden and he wants to die
He wants the mercy killing
But the indian government refuses, since euthanasia is illegal and its legalization could lead to abuses.
Finally, thanks to his wife and nurse Sofia D'Souza (Aishwarya Rai), he finally rests in peace.
Is this a joke?
I was suffocating! You can't move!
You couldn't live in Ethan Mascarenhas's body for more than 60 seconds
Due to this movie, we can understand that death is still taboo, even in a religious country like India.
After all, Ethan will have to face a lot of opposition
In fact, he's a victim of therapeutic relentlessness
Only one person will support him from the beginning to the end and she's...
I'm not talking about your life
I'm talking about Ethan, about his life
You've been devoted to him and I thank you.
But he has been a prisoner for 14 years
Of his bed, of his room, of his body
He can't feel anything, nothing!
Do you remember from whom the first "yes" came?
It was from Ethan's former assistant, Estella, who tells him she loved him very much
This is a huge proof of love because she's letting a person she cherished go
This show is about the project, not us
Of course, I already know your answer
But since you've called...
What do you say? Yes or no?
Yes or no, Estella?
And DEVYANI DUTTA goes through the same path
Contrary to Sofia, who refuses it from the beginning, DEVYANI fights for her friend until the end.
She goes to Court, she fights against his doctor, his nurse and against society in general
All of this for nothing! Only to see the end of her friend's suffering
Again, this kind of selfless action is a huge proof of love, according to us
Ethan will say, at the end, that it was all because she wanted to sleep with him.
Huh? Number 7?
Number 7
[Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani trailer]
In the movie Yeh Jawaani Hai Deewani, Avi fell in love with Aditi... too late.
YJHD is a very good movie, and the Deepika-Ranbir jodi is excellent
You're scared of the dark?
Come on! To celebrate, let's eat cake
This job was crucial for you
It was. But there's a time for everything.
And today
there's a moment for this
And so is the marvelous friendship between Aditya and Ranbir.
During the first part of the movie, we discovered Kalki Koechlin's talent, a French woman who grew up in India
Aditi, her character, is a complex woman, because she's really fond of Avi (Aditya Roy Kapur)
but then, she weds a much more serious man, but very kind, named Taran (Aditya's brother IRL)
So... you don't love Avi anymore?
- You knew? - Everybody knew, except him.
Yeah... I loved him.
But you know, I was alone in this relationship. It was only me.
But with Taran... how can I say it?
When we first met, everything was great.
And then, I felt like I could be happy.
But Avi, who've become an alcoholic 8 years after the quartet fell apart
looks like he's into Aditi, while her wedding approaches.
Before the ceremony, he tries to convince her not to marry, but she answers with: "Don't start again"
which leads us to believe they already had this discussion
It's early, Avi. Don't drink.
Stop it.
Don't marry, Aditi!
Stop your nonsense.
- When will we see this oaf? - Taran. His name's Taran.
- He's a boring oaf. - Not at all.
Avi will call Taran names, like "oaf" and "strange"
What if this disdain hid his love for Aditi,
since she realized he wasn't her man...
It's your call.
Number 6
[Trailer of Daawat-e-Ishq] [Song: "Indian Pop"]
In Daawat-e-Ishq, Gullu was in love with Taru from the beginning, because her ultimate standard is: food.
Mouki: Did you like Daawat-e-Ishq? Étoile: Us too!
However did you ask yourselves why Gullu married Taru after all?
We could talk about the 498A law from the Indian Penal Code, a real law that forbids dowries (and protects the brides)
Those who break this law are sentenced to 5 years in jail and a fine of 15 000 Rs. (or the amount of the dowry...
...whatever's the highest)
But maybe Gullu married him because he's a cook.
Do you recall Gullu's two standards for her Mr. Perfect?
He had to be smart and well-educated
And he had to speak English fluently
She finally meets Amjad, an NRI from USA who promises everything to her.
He's a vegetarian, she loves meat, but she decides to be a vegetarian for him (COUPLE COMPROMISES)
But the lovebirds are pretty bothered when Amjad's parents ask for a huge dowry
When Amjad does nothing to stop them, Gulrez decides to rook her next date and to flee to NYC without him
She falls for Taru, the one she was supposed to rook, they marry happily and without dowry
However, Taru didn't go to college and doesn't speak fluently English
So, what did Gulrez find in him?
Well, we believe her ultimate standard is: food.
You don't believe us? Then explain to us why the movie's called "Daawat-e-Ishq" (Feast of love).
Explain to us why Gullu uses "vegetarian" as an insult (Mouki's vegetarian)
And explain to us why there's 114 (yes, we counted them) references to food, inclunding metaphors,
the appetizing imagery and everytime someone talks about eating or food
Maybe Gullu didn't know it, but she just wanted someone able to cook her the best dishes in the world
Because she can start an entreprise by herself, she's a strong and independent woman!
Number 5
[Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge trailer]
In DDLJ, Raj really fell in love with Simran when she told him she was getting married.
Any Bollywood fan will think about DDLJ when someone mentions Swiss
Indeed, this is where Raj, professional playboy, and Simran, a traditional girl, have started a relationship
We can count the moments when they're falling for each other
For example, when hangover Simran wakes up the next morning
Or this earnest moment in the church
Or when they fall apart
I didn't get your address
I want to invite you to my wedding. Will you come?
No, I won't come.
But, we swear it on Shahrukh Khan's head,
Raj fell in love at this moment
I'm getting married.
Marry?
Why? Well, we know that Raj never fell in love. He only had a lot of affairs.
But that doesn't stop him from looking for "the one"
- You're never serious! - Never! But I'll be one day.
- When? - When I'll fall in love.
A guy like you never found love?!
I've had a lot of affairs, but I've never been in love, señorita.
I haven't found "The One"
Let's say he realized in feelings in the church, we can imagine he was planning on hitting on her later
Nonetheless, when we're sure we've found "The One", we have to make sure "The One" is available.
Unfortunately, Raj will learn it the hard way.
But instead of ducking, complaining or blaming destiny, he decides to joke.
Is he jealous? Does he want to compare with the fiancé? Or does he want the best for Simran?
It doesn't stop him from confessing his love and going to India to conquer Kajol... and his stepfather.
Number 4
[Shaandaar trailer]
In Shaandaar, Alia doesn't have a notion of time.
We think Shaandaar is one of the most underrated movies of 2015
We think some scenes are very rich, symbolically, which others could find annoying or misplaced
We'll focus on the character of Alia (Alia Bhatt)
She's a smart young woman, protectress of her young sister
And she's an insomniac
Oh... Sleep escapes from me
My heart is scared.
Slowly, softly, someone awakens the sleeping love
We've made some reasearch, but we're not experts
The basic definition of insomnia is a sleep disorder that prevents one to fall asleep quickly or...
causes many awakenings through the night
But in the movie, Alia's character doesn't sleep at all
So we pushed our research forward and discovered severe cases of insomnia
where the person is excited day and night and can't fall asleep quickly or only sleeps 2 to 3 hours at night
And it's enough!
Long term insomnia, according to the website www.fondationsommeil.com (in french only)
can tired the person, provoke more tension within relationships in addition to psychological distress
Alia doesn't have any of these symptoms
Then, we pushed our research even further
It could be idiopathic insomnia
It's a rare sleep disorder, developed during childhood
This type of insomnia is caused by an abnormality of the neurological control of the sleep-wake system
In other words, Alia's biological clock is defective
*Normal biological clock*
It's 8:45 PM!!
OKAY SHUT UP!
*Defective biological clock*
SAY SOMETHING, DAMNIT!
Her body doesn't send her the right signals when the night comes, so how can she have a notion of time?
She uses her mother's pocket watch by saying the time aloud a few times throughout the movie
Maybe it bothered you, but we think it allows her to understand some of her family's habits regarding time
For example:
This way, she doesn't lose track of time
Number 3
[Aiyyaa trailer]
In Aiyyaa, we don't think Surya asked for Meenakshi's hand at a venture
If you think Aiyyaa is an incomplete movie, we can only agree with you
Indeed, we only watch Meenakshi's (Rani Mukherjee) evolution through a complicate love triangle...
It would have been interesting to have the two guys's point of view
She's the fiancée of an ordinary boy. Not mean nor violent, he's only... *Mouki sighs*
While she's fantasize about a gloomy Tamil artist
who doesn't know she exists.
A sweet story floats in the air
Listen to it
Trying to
At the end, we learn that Surya (Prithviraj) was also having a crush on her
In a quick montage, we can see a few scenes from his point of view
Teach me how to say "I like dark skins" in Tamil
And we will never know if Surya was the perfect match for Meenakshi
All we know about him is that he lives with his mother, his father died, he paints and he owns an incense factory
He works there at night, which is why he looks like a drug addict zombie
While in Meenakshi's dreams, he looks like the most perfect guy
BUT why did Surya marry a stalker?!
Don't tell us he's a big macho with a small, in need of flattering ego
Nope.
Or because he wants to obey his mother, who wants to have a stepdaughter in her house
By the way he's... - ...a brute with his mom.
Yeah, not cordial
If you look at Aiyyaa's subtext, you can see its antiracist purpose
Because Meenakshi like dark skins better than fair skins
So Surya loves her because, contrary to some prejudices in India, Meenakshi isn't repeled by dark skins
To know more about this, you can watch the 2nd episode of Chai With Chandāga
Mouki: Yeah... Ouche. it's not a really good episode.
Obviously, we can't ignore the fact that Meenakshi wears blue
The colour blue is really important for Surya
He only paints with shades of blue
"Even when I'm trying to sleep"
"My dreams are all about you"
In India, blue is a significant colour. Many deities have a blue skin, like Rama
The colour blue is associated with wisdom, honesty, the fight against evil and pure feelings
Meenakshi embodies all these qualities. Except anything related to religion.
We never see her praying. Anyway, she's too busy seek the truth about Surya
And... what's next?
Mouki: She's religious!
She's religious because in "Sava Dollar", she asks to be an heroine in exchange of a dollar
It's a common hindu ritual to pray and to give something to a deity in exchange of a favour
Let me be an heroine, I'll give you a dollar
She's always seeking the ENTIRE truth about Surya
And she's wise enough not to listen to the rumours and to see beyond his reputation of drug addict/alcoholic
She's also fearless because she doesn't listen to rumours, but she also stalks him.
She goes into his appartment and his bedroom while he's absent
She also goes to the factory, hides in dark, dangerous places.
Special mention to pure feelings
Meenakshi is pretty naive: she doesn't know what cocaine is and she only watches old Bollywood movies
that encourage modesty
And if we forget about Dreamum Wakeupum (which is nice and sparkly),
Aga Bhai is the only explicit dance number
We can see this as a teenage girl who discovers her sexuality... even though she's 20-ish-years-old
Number 2
[Kuch Kuch Hota Hai Theme Song]
In KKHH, Tina let herself die
KKHH, my "first" movie
It's also the movie that revealed Rani Mukherji's talent
And we're going to talk about her!
Because Tina, her character, let herself die
We know that Tina, little Anjali's mother, died from an internal bleeding shortly after she gave birth
They're called "post partum internal bleedings" or "haemorrhage of deliverance"
It's a weird name, I'm shocked, but anyway
They represent 3 to 8% of postnatal deaths in Occident
The percentage is higher in developing countries, where medical teams are less qualified and have less material
Blood loss starts 24 hours after childbirth
Fortunately, there are ways to prevent and handle it
Since the hospital where Tina is seems like a good hospital (it's clean, they gave her a perfusion
and the medical team is complete)
We thought she could make it through
But the doctor doesn't have good (nor coherent) news for Rahul
Tina's very critical, Rahul
She'll die soon
We did our best, Rahul
She had an internal bleeding
We couldn't do anything
There are ways to prevent internal bleedings if the mother is taken care of during her pregnancy
Unfortunately, there are genetic predispositions that can complicate the processus
Tina's father is a widower from the beginning of the movie, so Tina's mom might have died the same way.
Also, nothing prevented Tina from asking a ceasarean
She knew there would be complications
But she also knew that you wanted this child
She loved this child more than her life
As I said, the bleeding is AFTER childbirth, and the blood loss comes 24 hours later
The mother has had time to expulse the placenta, the umbilical cord and the amniotic membranes
The baby is safe! The could have saved both!
When did Tina write 8 letters that summarized everything she wanted to tell her daughter?
Did she write them hastily on her death bed or did she forecast her death
Did she think she was condemned?
Am I going too far? Wait for it!
Tina insisted to call her daughter Anjali (and Rahul didn't get it)
She asks her 8-year-old daughter to find her husband's (Shahrukh Khan) true love (the big Anjali, Kajol)
If so, why didn't Tina search for Anjali before, you know, marrying Rahul and getting pregnant?
Guilty, but determined to make Rahul happy, Tina agreed to accomplish her marital duty
so, giving him a child, while knowing her mother died from the post-partum internal bleeding
It IS a weird name! But Tina could be freed from her guilt and to free Rahul from their matrimonial ties
for him to seek his true love. This theory was straight from my head
AND NUMBER ONE!
[Hum Hain Tum Pe Atke Yaara]
In the movie Pyaar Kiya To Darna Kya, we suspect Vihal's uncle to be gay
We're ready to bet that you didn't suspect us to chose this film as our number one
In fact, this theory was the first one to emerge, and to convince us to do this video
While watching this movie, I couldn't help myself to think that Vishal and Muskaan's uncle was gay
For all kinds of reasons, valid or not
PKTDK is pretty bold in the content, because the form... meh.
Fight scenes, really long song sequences, and a "Ramaiya Vastavaiya" intrigue before its time
We've seen more intense
Bold, because the characters are really far from stereotypes, but they've became stereotypes with time
For example: Suraj's (Salman Khan) friends: a tomboy girl, a douchebag, a dwarf and an homosexual
Nice bunch!
Suraj, he hit me with an egg!
You hit him? Ah!
Come in front! You should always be in front or on our sides!
Now, why did you hit him with an egg?
I didn't hit him, I was just ragging him.
Ragging him?!
UNMARKED HOMOPHOBIA!
The homosexual is very cringy. He uses ALL of the clichés that people have had about homosexuals for decades
As you might know it, the LGBTQ2* community isn't well perceived in India nowadays. Imagine back then!
It was pretty incredible (but the character is a stooge, so the movie's not THAT progressist)
But if they dared to put on screen such a character, why not put on screen his exact opposite
Because homosexual men who don't wear flashy clothes, who aren't always horny and
who don't scream to everyone their sexual preferences
Honestly, except if you're in a bar for single people, nobody (should) care about which gender you like
If your neighbor likes dudes, it's none of your business
Back to the point!
So... Vishal and Muskaan's uncle might be gay
What are the proofs?
First, Vishal says his uncle relinquished marriage to educate them
My uncle is more important to me than my parents
He didn't marry to be able to educate us
But one doesn't prevent the other (Even though it's a common scenario in the industry)
Maybe they would have needed an aunt as a maternal figure. And Muskaan wouldn't have had to do the chores.
Also, have you noticed how the uncle is close to Suraj?
Okay, Suraj saved his life. But add their regular legs massages.
And when the uncle shout against Muskaan because she's having an affair with Suraj
although he specified that her love life was in her brother's hands
who doesn't love Suraj. At all.
Suraj is protected by the uncle.
It seems like...
It goes further than friendship or gratitude...
...No?
- What is it, Suraj? - Nothing, sir. A pain in the neck.
- Come here! - No sir!
- I'll massage you. - No, sir, let me go, please
Strange...
There you go! Chandāga's Chandātheories!
We hope you liked it!
Do you want to submit your theories? Do you want to reinforce ours or to build yours?
Or make us lie! Maybe we're totally wrong!
Don't hesitate to leave a comment or to write to us at chandagabollywood@gmail.com
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Like, comment and share this video!
On this, it was Chandāga
And it was the 5th episode of Chai With Chandāga
*Étoile sings*
Mouki: What did I write?! Étoile: You wrote Aditi and Bunny
Mouki: But it doesn't make sense because... what?
Aditi? Why do we mention Aditi? Étoile: But why?
Bunny has to go!
Okay Avi... and Ranbir... NO! Avi and...
Étoile: WHY?!??
And so is the marve -- *laughs*
Mouki: she's not here right now, can you leave a message?
'Kay thanks
Étoile: You look like you don't give a f*ck
Étoile: But add to this the leg massages...
But add to this the leg massages when the uncle is shouting at Muskaan...
Mouki: WOW! End your sentence!
Mouki: there's supposed to be a dot. Because the way you say it, it looks like the uncle's shouting while
Suraj was giving him a leg massage
Étoile: but there's a comma! Mouki: Oh no!!!
Étoile: I read this like that!
Étoile: "Come on, uncle, it'll be fine"
"B*tch! You won't marry my leg masseur!"
Mouki: The uncle protects Suraj from Vishal.
Étoile: But why does the uncle screams at Muskaan?
Mouki: Because she stole his...
Mouki: because she...
Mouki: I went far, havent' I?
Let's not forget that Maynakshi
Maynakshy?
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