We have a very desperate concern.
"Are You Even Alive?"
Hi. I'm a woman in my 30s from Busan.
I've finally made up my mind
to share something embarrassing about my family.
It's about my older sister, who's 33 years old.
This was back when we were in school.
"Sis. Where are you going? What's with the bag?"
"I'll be back soon."
She said she'd be back soon,
but she ran away from home.
Because of my sister, who ran away from home often,
I spent half of my life looking for her.
Even after we became adults,
I think she came home maybe 5 times a year.
- 5 times a year? / - Yes.
"I'm home. I'm home."
"You're back. How have you been?
Do you know how worried we were about you?"
"I'm broke. Where's dad?"
She'd come home when she went broke
and leave as soon as she got money from dad.
The bigger problem is...
Ding dong. "Who is it?"
"Registered mail."
Ding dong.
"Registered mail. Registered mail."
We keep getting registered mail
under my sister's name.
It's the debt that our family must pay back.
Oh my.
My family is almost broke because of her.
I don't know where she lives or what she does.
Please help me find her. I beg you.
This is her concern.
It's a tough story.
I get that she can do this when she's young.
But she keeps doing this after she's grown up.
She only goes home 5 times a year.
No, it's fine that she lives on her own as an adult.
But the problem is that she's causing trouble.
Did you upset your parents when you were young?
I never ran away from home.
I told my parents that I would leave and
- left for a few days. / - That's running away.
No. I told my parents that I'd leave.
I told them and left.
Did you tell them where you were?
No, I didn't.
Then you ran away.
(Shocking! I ran away from home!)
Let's talk to the younger sister.
Please come on out.
(Who's concerned about her older sister?)
(Shin Miju)
Welcome.
(Nervous)
Would you like a glass of water if you're nervous?
Yes, please.
- Water? / - Yes.
Baek Z Young. INFINITE.
Hello.
- Davichi. / - Nice to meet you.
Lee Yeongja.
Lee Yeongja.
(Super upset!)
She's just so mean.
How can you only look at them?
I was pouring water for her and Dongwoo was
telling her to have water and she shook his hand.
(Have some water)
(Oh, Dongwoo)
I totally understand how you feel.
You're concerned, but also happy.
Your sister has been running away for years now?
She started to leave in middle school.
In elementary school, she was such a good girl.
Then in middle school, she made bad friends
and started to run away from home for 6 months a year.
Now that we are adults,
she goes home
maybe 5-10 times a year.
Now I can't reach her or know how she's doing.
How long has it been?
I haven't seen her for 5 years now.
You weren't home when she went home?
I don't live with my parents.
So you can't reach her now?
I used to be in contact with her through social media,
but she's cut that off, too.
I ask her, "Where are you? What do you do?"
But she won't tell me anything.
It's just so frustrating.
You said you keep getting registered mail?
What is that about?
My sister never comes home,
but her bills keep coming.
At first, it was $100-200 bills for her cell phone
or insurance fees.
But then it became high last fall.
She took out a loan for $9,000,
her credit card bill of $3,000, phone bill $1,000.
We got over $10,000 in debt from bills.
Your parents paid them all?
My dad took out a loan to pay them back.
- But... / - It's your dad's debt now.
He told my sister to pay them back
but she ran away with my dad's jewelry.
- When she came home? / - Yes.
- Your dad's jewelry? / - Yes.
What jewelry? A watch?
My dad got a deep cut from slicing a chestnut.
He needed surgery.
So he was getting an X-ray.
My sister was home to get some money that day.
So my dad asked her to hold the jewelry for him.
- Since he needed an X-ray. / - Yes.
- Oh my. / - Then what happened?
She ran away with them.
Was it gold?
He left his jewelry with my sister
when he had to go in for an X-ray.
What did he leave with your sister?
His necklace, bracelet and ring.
They are quite precious to my dad
so I asked my sister to send them home
but she hasn't replied.
No one really related to the concern until now.
But after hearing this,
the audience is quite angry.
How could she just leave her father there?
We need to talk to the sister,
but we don't know if she's here.
Is she here today?
To be honest, I am a bit worried.
The scriptwriters told me that they got in touch
with her and that she'd be here, but...
You're not sure if she's here, right?
I haven't seen her.
- You haven't? / - No.
Let's talk to the parents first.
Hello.
Hello.
Thank you so much for being here today.
How do you feel?
My younger girl said she applied to this program
and at first I really opposed it.
- This is an embarrassment. / - Sure.
But by being here today,
if my daughter could change,
I would do anything.
Sure. As a parent.
Ma'am. How do you feel?
Before coming here, my daughter said
Lee Yeongja's program could help us, so...
This is "Lee Yeongja's Hello Counselor?"
- Lee Yeongja's... / - Yes, you're right.
That's why we came here today.
If our problem could be solved,
being embarrassed is nothing.
We came with desperation.
I'm glad you came today, ma'am.
Lee Yeongja and the boys will solve your problem.
Mother, father and younger sister
and the production crew really worked hard.
Her older sister will come out now.
Let's find out how she feels
and how she's been doing.
Let's all be attentive when she comes out.
If she comes out today, it's your first time
- seeing her in 5 years? / - Yes.
We're nervous for you.
When she comes out, we should applaud her
for mustering up the courage to be here.
Let's bring her out.
It took a lot of courage to be here today.
Let's all yell out, "Sis!"
Please come on out.
Go.
Sis!
(Sis! Please come on out!)
She's really here.
Welcome.
(Her older sister is here)
Please applaud everyone. It's her sister.
(The parents are expressionless)
Nice to meet you.
Look at her smile. Are you happy?
- Yes. / - You two look alike.
You two really look alike.
I'm sure you heard us talk from the back.
How do you feel?
I'm tired of running away now.
I wanted to use this opportunity
to talk freely with my family today.
- Good job. / - You made the right decision.
How long has it been?
Your sister is here.
I haven't seen her for a while.
I think the last time I saw my parents
was about 3 months ago.
3 months ago.
Say hello. It's your father.
- Oh my. / - Father.
- Say hello to your sis. / - He's crying.
(He bursts into tears from mixed emotions)
(Everyone in the family must feel the same way)
Please say a word.
It's been a while since you've seen her up close.
First of all,
I am relieved that she is here.
It's great to see her.
I hate her, but she is still my girl.
That's right.
Ma'am?
It's nice to see you.
She's thanking her daughter for coming today.
What about you?
You were smiling at first.
Are you crying because you have
mixed emotions about seeing her after 5 years?
I wonder if she's eating well.
You're the younger sister.
You're not her mom.
It looks like she's eating well.
Since everyone is in tears,
we joke to uplift the mood.
You brought up the courage to be here.
Could you please tell us how you feel
and what you've been up to?
- Sure. / - Great.
Let me ask you. Your sister came here today
because she's concerned. Do you understand that?
Yes, I do understand,
but I don't want to move back home right now.
Why not?
I lost my goals in life when I was young
and I made some bad friends.
I'm more comfortable being alone now.
It has become a habit.
I feel trapped when I'm home.
That's fine, but
couldn't you keep in touch with them?
I don't call because they nag.
My mom has a loud voice
so it's upsetting to hear her nag at me.
The fact that your bills go to your parents
means that you are financially unstable.
I have a job,
but I get stressed from working.
Since I live alone, I end up drinking a lot.
I spend all my money on alcohol.
Since I can't save up money,
I am unable to contact my family.
$10,000 is a lot of money.
Didn't you feel bad?
That's why they nag at you.
I felt bad and that's why I couldn't call them.
I left home to pay them back, but right now...
You just keep feeling bad, so you can't face them.
It has become a larger problem.
Aren't you relying on alcohol because
you're not happy living on your own?
I'm not happy,
but I don't want to hear them nag.
I like being by myself.
She's just used to it. Too much time has passed.
When you found out that she has a large debt,
how did you feel?
I thought, "What should I do with her?
Should I put her in a mental hospital?
Would she get a grip if I killed myself?"
That's what I thought to myself.
Where do you live?
I live in Jeolla-do.
We have no idea how you live right now.
How are you doing?
Do you live by yourself?
No, I live with a coworker.
What do you do?
An acquaintance opened a bar,
- so I work as a bartender. / - At a bar.
Why did you take out a loan?
I took out a loan for my rent deposit.
Then I looked for another job to pay that back
and got a job at a cell phone store.
But the job is paid based on commission.
If I don't sell enough phones per month,
I had to buy phones under my name
then I ended up with a bigger debt.
Phone stores pay well if everything goes well.
Your sister told us earlier that
you were really nice in elementary school.
Don't people use that to their advantage?
That's somewhat true and
I got a burn when I was young.
I am also cross-eyed like my dad.
I cover that up with makeup and contact lenses.
My friends tend to ostracize me and
won't hang out with me unless I spend money.
So I end up spending more money.
You spend money to be with your friends?
My parents don't understand why I'm this way.
They were always strict, forced me to cut my hair.
My mom worked in a bar and
didn't come home often.
My friends stayed by my side and comforted me
if I bought drinks for them.
That's why I relied on them more.
You needed your family's love.
Didn't you think about living with
your sister when you were young?
It'd be nice if she was kind to me,
but she was mean to me, calling me names.
- You felt like no one was on your side. / - Yes.
Did you know that your
daughter felt this way ever since she was young?
I didn't know that at all.
What parent would watch their daughter
go down the wrong path?
I scolded her, beat her and
cut her hair so that she wouldn't leave home.
Now I feel like I am at fault.
I regret doing that now.
Ma'am. You are not
the kind-mother type who holds them
in your arms and comforts them, right?
My personality is more masculine,
so I say what's on my mind.
And she was too busy
trying to make ends meet.
Your sister said you were mean to her.
Did you know that's how she felt?
We are only a year apart.
I called her by her name
out of love.
I never knew that she felt like
I was looking down on her and being mean to her.
- You found out today? / - Yes.
Did you know that she didn't like her eyes?
- I didn't know. / - She never told you.
That's what frustrated me.
I never had a chance to really talk to her.
I could never understand why she left.
All I knew was that she was never home.
You seem to be quite fragile.
I can't understand how you could just leave
your father at the hospital and take his jewelry.
That's a misunderstanding.
I put them in my purse so I wouldn't lose them.
I work at a bar and
I left without knowing that I had them.
- You didn't know you had them? / - I didn't know.
- Do you have them with you? / - I do.
Really? What a relief.
I was going to report her to the police.
She forgot that she had them in her purse.
Sir. She didn't steal them from you.
I was hoping that was the case.
I knew she wasn't that bad.
Are they meaningful to you?
It was my wife's first gift to me.
Why didn't you tell him then?
I was going to tell him,
but another person had my purse.
She left it in a locker.
It can only open with a fingerprint.
She was the only one who could open it.
She had her reasons.
You could've texted him that you had them.
I have a prepaid phone.
A prepaid phone.
I couldn't text because I didn't have any money.
Please give them back to him.
Put them on him.
After 3 months.
Ma'am. When did you give them to him?
It was 3 years ago.
It's a germanium bracelet.
It's a germanium bracelet.
It's a health bracelet.
Sir. Your daughter is going to put it on for you.
- His necklace. / - He looks happy.
That looks like a nice necklace.
A gold necklace.
Your father is happy, right?
Yes.
- His daughter is putting it on. / - He's nice.
- How could she take them? / - Right.
(What?)
Put it inside his collar.
Let him show off his necklace.
Leave it.
(Pleased!)
She says that she feels trapped at home.
Can't you give her some time?
She says that she'll pay the money back.
Money is not the issue here.
She has a daughter.
She has a daughter.
- Who? Your sister? / - Yes.
She was married?
No. She called us when she was 23.
My dad and I went to Seoul.
She was all alone with no husband.
She was 8 months pregnant and was
shivering in the cold with a single t-shirt on.
Your sister?
My dad and I were shocked.
She wanted to have the baby,
so we took the baby with us.
So her daughter is living with your parents?
So her grandparents are raising her?
Yes, that's right.
How old is she?
She's 11 years old.
What about your sister?
She just left?
Without her daughter?
But she must've loved her daughter.
She bragged about her girl a lot.
But then she left home when the baby was 3.
So she was home until the baby was 3 years old?
Yes.
I know I should've been with my daughter,
but I felt suffocated at home.
And I was relieved that
my parents were good to her.
I asked you earlier if you were married.
No, I'm not married.
You don't have to be married to have a child.
(He looks like he learned that just today)
So where's the father?
I don't keep in touch with him anymore.
He came on the 100th day.
When you were pregnant for 100 days?
No, when my daughter was 100 days old.
The baby's father came?
Why would he come when she's 100 days pregnant?
No one celebrates that.
We said that we'd never see each other again.
We first met through an app.
At the time, he had a nice car.
I was young and
I thought he was a successful man.
He said he was 6 years older, but
I later found out that he's 12 years older.
He was a gambler and couldn't make a living.
So I don't keep in touch with him anymore.
Ma'am. How did you feel at the time?
When she ran away from home
I had no intention of taking her back.
But then I saw my daughter's condition.
She was suffering from preeclampsia.
I was afraid she'd die if I didn't take her in.
I felt bad for her.
So we decided to accept her and her baby.
But she left home again. It really hurt me.
You must've felt betrayed.
How do you feel when you look at your niece?
She wasn't brought up in a normal family,
so she matured early. She senses things quickly.
When she was young, she told
my parents that she missed her mom.
But now, she never talks about her mom.
When we badmouth her mom because of her debt
she badmouths her mom more
to protect her mom.
Whenever she talks about her mom, she smiles
and says, "I only need you, grandma and grandpa.
Auntie, I wish you were my mom.
You can get married but never have a baby.
You must only love me."
I feel so bad for her.
How do you feel now that you've heard this?
I never knew that's how my daughter felt.
When she told me she liked her grandparents more
I was a bit upset.
Now I understand why she said that.
Don't you miss your daughter?
I do, so I kept in touch with her.
But during our calls, she would
hand the phone over to my parents.
So I started to call her less.
How long has it been since you talked to her?
It's been about a month.
It's not important that you keep in touch with her
but now that she's older,
she would wonder why her mom isn't with her.
She knows now. She's old enough.
She is old enough now.
Oh, she's on the phone? Now?
Who?
Her daughter?
She should know how her daughter feels
so that she can change.
She's on the phone.
Hi.
Hello.
Do you know what program this is?
No, I don't.
I just know that they're at a shoot.
She knows that they're in a shoot.
Do you know what this shoot is about?
It's because mom doesn't come home.
She's smart.
Why do you think your mom doesn't live with you?
- Because she's busy. / - Because she's busy.
How do you feel about not living with your mom?
Sometimes, I'm scared.
Sometimes, I'm angry.
But mostly, it feels empty without her.
When do you miss your mom the most?
When it rains after school
and I don't have an umbrella.
I have to walk home by myself.
You have to walk home by yourself getting wet
while your friends go home with their moms?
- Yes. / - I see.
Your mom hasn't called you often because
you kept handing the phone to your grandparents.
Yes.
I thought if I give the phone to my grandparents
they might be able to say something to her.
I thought they would want to hear from her, too.
She wanted to resolve this problem.
Do you miss your mom?
Do you miss her?
Of course she misses her.
Yes, I miss her a lot.
You wish your mom
could be with you?
I see.
She's worried that her mom might be hurt
or her grandparents might become more heartbroken.
She is more mature than kids her age.
Why don't you talk to your mom?
Talk to your mom.
Okay.
Mom.
Yes, Hye-eun.
Huh?
What are you doing?
Uh... Nothing.
Do you have something you'd like her to do?
Mom!
Be a good girl and listen to your parents.
I wish you'd come home so I won't be alone.
Help me with my homework
and be with me.
She's telling her mom to be a good girl!
Your daughter made a request.
You should answer to her.
I will try hard to change.
Let's meet often, eat together
and go to places together.
Tell her how much you love her.
Please remember that I really love you.
Okay.
Bye.
- Bye. / - Bye.
Goodbye.
Just by listening to her talk,
I can tell that she's more mature than
other kids her age.
Kids should be blurting things out.
When I was young, my dad was a teacher
and my mom was always sick,
so they couldn't come to my graduations.
So I always went out to eat with my friend's parents.
Imagine how uncomfortable I felt because
the parents wanted to be with just family.
So I would keep talking about how well
their son does at school and how much
the teachers complimented their son.
They found out new things about their son...
Even at that young age?
In the end, they ended up liking me.
I matured early, too, because
my parents weren't there and I had to stay aware.
That's what happens.
I was reminded of that as I listened to her talk.
It's heartbreaking.
You said earlier that
your mom wasn't home when you were young
and that's why you went down the wrong path.
You're forcing the same thing you hated
on your daughter and it's worse.
Much worse.
That's true, but
I am not brave enough to move back in just now.
Why not? Please tell us.
Why can't you move back in?
I need to clear my debt first.
If I move back home without doing that,
I will continue to feel bad
and rely on friends or alcohol again.
I'm sorry for butting in,
but your daughter should be your top priority.
But you seem to have your priorities based
on your feelings and what you want personally.
Shouldn't you change your priorities?
You want to have fun with friends and drink even now?
I knew someone who was like that.
I want to have my own life, to be honest.
It has become a habit.
I like the way things are right now.
It'd be a problem even if you didn't have
a daughter, but you do.
You have to move back in!
To be honest, I don't want
a regular job because it's suffocating.
But my dad wants me to have a stable job.
I went to Gwangju
to work at a factory to pay off my debt.
But the factory was filled with fine dust
and I felt like I was going to die there.
You can work elsewhere.
So people who work there go there to die?
Do they work there to die?
That's your opinion. You just keep
pushing things away if you don't like something.
I'm curious.
How did you pay off her debt, sir?
I'm a taxi driver.
We can barely make ends meet.
And we are raising our granddaughter.
I am facing my limits now.
What happens if you don't pay off her debt?
That'd be a problem.
(He's quite adamant, too)
She would be in trouble with the law.
You know that they would feel bad for you,
so you send your bills to them.
You keep doing the same thing.
What if your daughter does the same
and decides to do something extreme?
How would you feel?
That wouldn't be good.
You're doing the same thing to your own parents.
I'm worried about your parents' health.
How's your health?
They must be so stressed.
I'm ill, too.
I need surgery for lumbar stenosis.
I have to rest for 6 months after the surgery.
The surgery costs a lot, too.
It would cost about $8,000 to $10,000.
So I'm putting it off,
but I have to do it someday.
Mother works, too?
How's your health?
My daughter has caused me so much grief
and now I am diabetic.
My legs are swollen and I can't see very well.
I am often sick because of diabetes
but since I have to raise my granddaughter
I still work.
The older daughter needs to know that.
We used to be a happy family, but
my parents are quite depressed now.
They often call and tell me that they want to die.
They love their granddaughter, but
sometimes they tell her that they hate her
because she looks like my sister.
My niece told me that she often cried
under the blanket, unable to say anything.
I feel bad for my parents and my niece.
I'm overwhelmed now, to be honest.
How do you feel now?
Do you still want to enjoy your life?
No, it's not that, but...
You still don't intend to move back in, right?
- Not yet. / - What?
Not yet.
You will never be able to pay off your debt
because you spend your money on alcohol.
Whether it'd be $500 or $200,
you should be paying it off, but you're not.
You've made your whole family's life miserable.
And you still haven't made up your mind.
What should be done here?
It's time to make up your mind.
Seriously.
What would want to make you move back home?
First, I need to pay off my debt.
That's why I'm a bit scared.
That's just an excuse.
You just want to enjoy your life!
Be honest.
Yes. A little bit.
It's fine that you don't change
and only your life is ruined.
But you're ruining everyone else's life, too.
After a few decades,
your parents won't be here to help you out.
You must start paying it off now.
How much debt do you have?
About $13,000.
You can totally pay that off if you start now.
The money that your parents are giving you
is from your dad sacrificing his back.
He can't get surgery because of your debt.
Please say a word to your sister.
Our future is important, too,
but I think Hye-eun's future is most important.
We all want to raise her well.
We all feel the same way,
so please move back in and resolve this together.
- That's right. / - All right.
Let's start with Haeri to see if it's a concern.
- Of course. / - What's the reason?
Do we need a reason?
My face says it all.
You look like you've run away from home.
I think it's a concern, too.
I hope you resolve this issue as a family
and find a way to be happy with your daughter.
- Z Young. / - I think it's a concern, too.
When I think about
your daughter and your parents,
there's no way to not see it as a concern.
- You all feel the same way? / - Yes.
Press the buttons together.
One, two, three.
It's a concern.
Couldn't you just move back home
for your daughter's sake?
For your daughter.
I lost my father 2 years ago
because he got sick.
All you can do is regret when it's too late.
But it's not too late for you.
You have time and the opportunity.
I really hope you can see that.
That's right.
What more can we say here?
If you relate to her concern, press the button.
(What does the audience think?)
5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
Please stop.
So many people pressed the button.
I don't think we can go on. We're exhausted.
- We're done now, right? / - This was so grave.
Please say a word to your family.
I will make up my mind now.
I will finish my work in Jeolla-do by the end of
this month and move back home,
but I can't promise I'll do well.
But I'll do my best to do better.
Please move back home by the end of this month.
Please move back home.
Please! I beg you!
Mom, Dad, I'm sorry for causing so much trouble.
I will give up the things I want
and be a good daughter now.
That sounds great!
(We hope you keep that promise!)
When people were pressing the button
why did you cover your ears?
I thought I was a terrible person.
This is a serious concern.
Right.
I'm sure it sounded
very painful to you.
Please show us the result.
(Announcing the result)
"Are You Even Alive?"
She is alive.
- She was eating well. / - That's good.
161 votes!
(They got 161 votes)
(After the shoot)
(She goes to the waiting room with her family)
(Her daughter actually came)
(They're reuniting after a long time)
You have to go to school tomorrow. Aren't you tired?
It's winter break.
Winter break?
It's winter break right now.
(Oh, I see)
You didn't know that?
Why won't you come home?
I'm going back home by the end of this month.
- For real? / - Yes.
Okay.
Pinky swear!
(We hope you are happy from now on!)
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