Hi community of awesome, I'm Ava Jae, and this is bookishpixie.
So my first drafts actually tend to lack in description.
For me, description is something that I tend to focus on in revisions.
The reason being, for me I tend to be a lot more plot and dialogue-focused when I'm first
drafting, so I don't think as much as I should probably about what's going on around the
character, or what their environment is like.
But, you know, filling in those gaps is what revisions are for.
But how much description is too much?
The idea when writing description is to give enough information that the readers can picture
the characters' surroundings, but not so much information that you stop the action completely
to go on and on and on about the environment.
I like to blend description into the action, so a little bit upfront as the character enters
a new environment, and then they'll also notice things as the dialogue and action happens.
That way you never stop the action and kill the pacing with a giant mountain of description.
A really important thing to remember is your description should be filtered through your perspective character.
What one character notices about an environment, and what they think about it, is very different
from what another character might think.
The words you use to describe said environment should always reflect the perspective characters' language.
It should sound like them.
Because remember, you, the author, aren't the one describing—your point of view character is.
To give you an example, I'm going to read a quick sample from BEYOND THE RED, of Eros's
impressions of the palace complex in Elja for the first time.
I think it gets to the point that I'm describing that the description should sound like your
character because this very uniquely sounds like Eros and not Kora.
Okay, here we go.
"Everything here is white and red.
Endless red sands stretch far into the horizon.
Strong, smooth white walls reach to the stars.
Glistening white stone buildings shimmer different colors under the heat of the suns, all draped
in red flags and banners with the Eljan insignia.
Eljan citizens of all ages walk quickly down the streets, doing whatever they voiding do
in the city, every adult marked with varying degrees of black unreadable text on their bodies.
All the buildings have darkened windows and closed doors—the people here are just *so* friendly.
Reflective black spheres the size of my fist zip in and out of the crowd, ducking around
buildings and between heads.
Paved white pathways wind between the buildings, around the wall, and into the palace complex,
where I'm sure it's even more disgustingly elaborate, but we're not headed there."
So I mean, the obvious key points there being that Kora obviously would not think that her
palace complex is "disgustingly elaborate," and she wouldn't say "voiding" and she'd,
um, probably not pay as much attention to the tattoos that everyone has because everyone
has them and they're normal to her—things like that, they're things that Eros would
notice and the way he notices them, and the way he thinks about them are uniquely his.
So main takeaways, don't describe everything all at once because you will destroy your
pacing, and always make sure you describe through your perspective characters.
So that's what I've got for today!
If you liked what you saw, don't forget to subscribe and comment, and I'll see you guise next week!
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