♫ [ANCIENT PIXELS] ♫
♫ (intro music) ♫
[CHESS]
Chess is one of the extremely old games,
ti is not known exactly when it was created.
But some believe it is created some 2000 years ago
Heh! You can't be more retro then that? A?
Over the years, the rules of the game have changed,
but the look remained similar.
Basically,
the board that is made on fields,
alternately painted in black and white,
and you have a bunch of figures with which you can play
Unfortunately, I don't have older versions of this game,
so I'll have to to play on the newer.
Which has more advanced graphics
and figures look okay.
Even though...
Given how much versions of this game you have,
compared to someone other newer versions,
This game looks like a shit!
I mean, look at it! What is this!?
A cardboard with a bunch of plastic?
Before you start the game,
you will notice that you do not have any options
You can't even choose whether you want to play as 1 or 2 players.
Worse still,
You have to put figures yourself!
I mean ... What the fuck ?!
I needing to do that too?
You must know in what order to put them!
Or at least look it up on the Internet.
Once you place them
The game can start.
But if you play against the computer
you will not be happy.
It will never do anything!
Seriously!
You can sit there until the cows come home
but the computer will not move!
What the fuck!
Have these people test this game at all?
You can also play this game against other human,
or play it alone.
Although whenever I played against someone
I've always lost!
O yeah!
And don't think you can to play this game on-line,
Someone has to came physically to you in order to play this game!
Now I don't know whether I suck,
or the game is too hadr!
In any case, I prefer to it play alone.
Like all other games.
If you play alone,
then you control both sides.
Which means that you will win and lose in each game.
Actually, I've never saw any game that works like that.
Anyway, how is this game played?
You have 16 figures that you can control.
And only one figure you can move in your turn.
In other words,
This is a turn-based strategy game.
In this game you have 6 different types of figures.
And each of them does something else.
E.g:
Pawns can move just one field forward,
Rooks move in straight line,
Bishops move only diagonally,
Knight have this weird jumping ...
Well, I'm not sure how.
The queen can go in eight direction,
and the king can go anywhere,
but only one step.
Which is useless,
but if they kill the king
the game is over.
In any case
the game is strategically oriented
and you have to think carefully before you take a step.
As I said the goal of the game is to kill the king of your enemy.
The good thing is that figures can be killed
or be "eaten" how this game refers to it.
And you can kill all the enemies before you eat the king.
But that's pretty hard.
Because he can eat you too.
So, it's best idea to targeting the king from the begining.
One of the strange things is that
powns, when they move, they go only one field forward,
But when they eat other figures, then they go diagonally.
Actually, I'm not sure why it does so, oh well.
There's a lot of other rules here which I did not exactly figure out,
though, I think that's not that important at this moment.
Now, that's all great,
but there is one huge problem.
What I said is how the game should be played.
But the game does not play by it's rules.
Yes, I can be asshole and moving this figure there!
Nothing prevents me!
Actually, I can do anything
and the game will not do anything!
I can move figures how I want!
I can jump the board and eat the king!
I can rape the queen!
I can eat any figure!
I can remove all the enemies!
Even aliens can take them away!
But the game will not do anything!
This must be the worst game which has ever been made
I have no idea who came to this fucking idea
to make the game where somebody made up the rules
but they forgot to implemented it in to the game!
And is it worth playing?
NO! By no means!
The computer has no clue how to play,
If you play against someone else,
You will always lose
and you'll have to stand other faces throughout the game.
And when they win, they will still want to play more to further humiliate you,
and with all this, you have to remember the rules yourself
because this game will do absolutely nothing.
This game is a bull shit!
Which has not been completed, nor tested
and I have no idea how anyone could release something like that out!
(sighs)
In any case
That would be all from me.
And ...
You've been fooled!
HA HA HA HA !!!
Thank you for watching April fools day episode.
If you liked it,
Don't forget to give a thumbs up and share it with your friends.
For more videos, subscribe to my channel
and follow me on social networks.
And for the end one greeting for Timex rimex who wrote:
just keep it up brooo. I adore you please greet me in the next video.
Không có nhận xét nào:
Đăng nhận xét