ANNOUNCER: THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM IS PAID FOR BY
THE FRIENDS AND PARTNERS OF JOYCE MEYER MINISTRIES.
JOYCE: WELL, GOD, I MESSED UP AGAIN.
I REPENT, LORD, I TURN AWAY FROM IT.
I DON'T WANT TO ACT LIKE THAT, I'M SO SORRY.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR FORGIVENESS.
I RECEIVE YOUR MERCY.
RUTH: EVERYBODY KNEW I WAS BILLY GRAHAM'S DAUGHTER, AND
THEY ALL THOUGHT I OUGHT TO BE SUPER SPIRITUAL, OR KNOW MORE
BIBLE, OR KNOW MORE HYMNS.
AND SO, YOU TRY TO MEET THOSE EXPECTATIONS, AND YOU'RE NEVER
ABLE TO BE YOURSELF.
GINGER: AS WE WALK THROUGH EACH NEW DAY,
WE ALL HAVE QUESTIONS.
THEY'RE JUST PART OF LIFE.
BUT DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE ANSWERS FOR YOU?
GOD SAYS WHEN WE LOOK, WE'LL FIND HIM.
HE'S NOT TRYING TO HIDE ANYTHING.
SO TOGETHER, WE ARE DISCOVERING LIFE'S EVERYDAY ANSWERS.
GINGER: WELCOME TO "EVERYDAY ANSWERS."
YOU KNOW, ON THE WALL BEHIND ME, WE HAVE SOME BEAUTIFUL
MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS.
AND IF I BEGAN TO PLAY ANY ONE OF THOSE, VERY SOON AFTERWARD
YOU WOULD START SCREAMING FOR MERCY.
THAT'S BECAUSE I CAN'T PLAY ANY OF THOSE INSTRUMENTS,
AND IT WOULD BE TERRIBLY PAINFUL FOR YOU.
THERE ARE MANY TIMES THAT WE NEED TO ASK FOR MERCY.
AND THAT'S A SIMPLE EXAMPLE, I WOULD GLADLY GIVE YOU
THAT MERCY.
BUT SOMETIMES, WE JUST DON'T FEEL LIKE WE DESERVE MERCY.
SO, HOW DO WE GET MERCY?
JOYCE IS GOING TO ANSWER THAT QUESTION SOON.
BUT FIRST, CHECK OUT THIS POLL THAT YOU TOOK PERHAPS ON
TWITTER.
WE ASKED THIS QUESTION, SOMETIMES IT'S DIFFICULT TO
BELIEVE THAT, A, GOD WANTS TO HELP ME.
B, I DESERVE GOD'S HELP.
OR C, GOD IS NOT MAD AT ME."
AND YOU'LL SEE THE RESPONSES THERE, IT WAS PRETTY MUCH EQUAL
ALONG ALL THREE OF THOSE THAT MANY OF US HAVE A VERY DIFFICULT
TIME BELIEVING THOSE THINGS.
DOES GOD WANT TO HELP ME?
DO I DESERVE THAT HELP?
AND IS GOD MAD AT ME?
WELL, ALL OF THOSE OPTIONS ARE BASED ON HOW WE FEEL ABOUT
OURSELVES, AND WHAT WE THINK GOD WILL DO BASED ON OUR ACTIONS.
BUT THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS.
HIS MERCY IS NEW EVERY DAY.
AND THAT'S SIMPLY BECAUSE OF WHO HE IS.
HE IS GOOD.
TODAY, RUTH GRAHAM WILL SHARE HOW MERCY HELPED HEAL HER FROM
THE CHALLENGES OF BEING THE DAUGHTER OF ONE OF THE MOST
WELL-KNOWN EVANGELISTS IN HISTORY.
AND FIRST, HERE'S JOYCE'S ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION,
DOES GOD WANT TO HELP ME?
JOYCE: WE'VE ALL GOT A STORY.
AND YOUR STORY IS IMPORTANT.
AND MAYBE YOU'RE ONE OF THE ONES WHO COULD GIVE YOUR VICTORY
REPORT, YOUR TESTIMONY OF WHAT GOD HAS DONE FOR YOU.
AND MAYBE YOU'RE IN THE PROCESS OF WATCHING GOD DO SOMETHING
FOR YOU.
OR MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, YOU'RE HERE TONIGHT AND YOU JUST
THOUGHT YOU HAD TO LIVE WITH IT.
IT'S AMAZING HOW MANY PEOPLE THAT EVEN ARE CHRISTIANS AND GO
TO CHURCH, I WAS ONE OF THEM FOR A LONG TIME, WHO HAS NO IDEA
THAT GOD IS INTERESTED IN ANYTHING OTHER THAN JUST SAVING
THEM AND GETTING THEM TO HEAVEN.
AND SO, I LIVED AS A BROKEN CHRISTIAN FOR A LONG, LONG,
LONG, LONG TIME.
AND I THINK IT'S BAD TO BE A PITIFUL SINNER, BUT IT'S REALLY
BAD TO BE A PITIFUL SAINT.
BECAUSE WE ARE GOD'S ADVERTISEMENT TO THE WORLD.
WE'RE HIS AMBASSADORS, AND HE'S MAKING AN APPEAL TO THE WORLD
THROUGH US.
AND SO, IT'S IMPORTANT FOR YOUR SAKE AND ALSO FOR HIS THAT IF
YOU'VE NEVER DONE IT BEFORE, THAT YOU MAKE A DECISION TONIGHT
THAT YOU'RE GOING TO GO ALL THE WAY THROUGH WITH GOD, AND
YOU'RE GOING TO BE EVERYTHING THAT YOU CAN BE IN HIM.
AND THAT YOU'RE NOT GOING TO LIVE FULL OF PAIN, AND SECRETS,
AND REGRETS FROM THE PAST.
BUT YOU'RE GOING TO GO ALL THE WAY THROUGH, AND YOU ARE GOING
TO BE WHOLE, AND YOU ARE GOING TO BE HAPPY, AND YOU ARE GOING
TO BE STRONG, AND YOU ARE GOING TO BE CONFIDENT, AND YOU ARE
GOING TO HOLD YOUR HEAD UP HIGH, AND YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE
THE DEVIL MAD EVERY SINGLE DAY THAT YOU'RE ON THIS PLANET.
AMEN?
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
JOYCE: YOUR SOUL IS THE INNER PART OF YOU.
AND IT'S A PART THAT CERTAINLY WE CAN HIDE FROM PEOPLE
OUT HERE.
SOMETIMES, WE EVEN GET PRETTY GOOD AT HIDING IT
FROM OURSELVES.
YOU KNOW, I THINK ONE OF THE GREATEST THINGS THAT
WE CAN DO IS KNOW OURSELVES.
I MEAN REALLY KNOW YOURSELF.
AND THAT TAKES A LIFETIME TO REALLY KNOW YOURSELF AND TO BE
HONEST WITH YOURSELF.
BUT CERTAINLY GOD KNOWS US.
AND SO, IT'S VERY POSSIBLE TO LOOK ALL TOGETHER ON THE
OUTSIDE, AND YET BE A COMPLETE, TOTAL MESS ON THE INSIDE.
HAS ANYBODY GOTTEN GOOD AT DRESSING IT UP, AND TAKING IT
TO CHURCH, AND PUTTING ON YOUR CHURCH FACE?
BUT YET INSIDE, YOU'RE THINKING, "I AM FALLING APART, AND WHY IS
THIS NOT WORKING FOR ME?" THE CONDITION OF OUR SOUL IS NOT
ONLY FELT BY US, BUT IT'S ALSO FELT BY ALL THOSE THAT WE ARE IN
RELATIONSHIP WITH.
AND TO BE HONEST, THE BIGGEST FAVOR THAT YOU CAN DO YOUR
FAMILY IS TO BE A HEALTHY YOU.
A HEALTHY, WHOLE YOU, WHERE THEY DON'T HAVE TO WONDER EVERY DAY
WHAT VERSION OF YOU THEY'RE GOING TO GET.
COME ON.
YOU KNOW, DAVE SAYS, "I REMEMBER I USED TO DRIVE DOWN THE HIGHWAY
AT NIGHT AND THINK, 'I WONDER WHAT SHE'LL BE LIKE TONIGHT.'"
AND I DIDN'T KNOW EITHER UNTIL THE DEVIL TOLD ME.
I DIDN'T KNOW UNTIL I GOT UP AND SAW WHAT MY CIRCUMSTANCES
WERE GOING TO BE THAT WAY.
BECAUSE IF THEY WERE GOOD AND I WAS GETTING EVERYTHING I WANTED,
THEN I MIGHT BE HAPPY.
BUT I HAD NO STABILITY IN MY LIFE.
AND THERE'S NOTHING WORSE THAN BEING CONTROLLED BY YOUR
THOUGHTS, AND YOUR FEELINGS, AND WHAT PEOPLE SAY OR DON'T SAY,
OR WHAT PEOPLE DO OR DON'T DO, OR WHETHER YOU GET WHAT YOU WANT
OR YOU DON'T GET WHAT YOU WANT.
I WANT TO BE HAPPY ALL THE TIME, NOT JUST WHEN MY CIRCUMSTANCES
ARE TELLING ME THAT IT'S OKAY TO BE HAPPY.
IF THE SOUL IS WOUNDED, WE OFTEN WOUND OTHER PEOPLE.
MANY TIMES UNINTENTIONALLY, MANY TIMES WE DON'T EVEN KNOW THAT
WE'RE DOING IT.
BUT THAT'S WHY WE RUN INTO SO MANY PEOPLE IN THE WORLD, AND WE
THINK, "WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?" WELL, THEY'RE WOUNDED
ON THE INSIDE.
AND TO BE HONEST, SOMETIMES, INSTEAD OF JUST WANTING TO GET
AWAY FROM PEOPLE LIKE THAT, WE MIGHT WANT TO TAKE A LITTLE MORE
TIME TO FIND OUT WHAT'S GOING ON INSIDE THEM BECAUSE PROBABLY
THERE'S SOMEBODY THAT'S BLEEDING ON THE INSIDE AND DOESN'T KNOW
HOW TO GET THE HELP THAT THEY NEED.
SO I THINK LOOSELY, VERY LOOSELY, WE CAN SAY THAT
OUR SOUL IS OUR PERSONALITY.
IT'S THE WAY WE PRESENT OURSELVES.
AND SO, GOD CAN HEAL OUR PERSONALITY.
JAMES 1:21, I LOVE THIS SCRIPTURE, IT SAYS, "RECEIVE
THE WORD OF GOD WITH MEEKNESS BECAUSE IT CONTAINS THE POWER TO
SAVE YOUR SOUL."
IT DOESN'T SAY TO SAVE YOU LIKE SO YOU CAN GO TO HEAVEN.
IT SAYS THE WORD OF GOD IS THE HEALING BALM THAT WE NEED
THAT WILL BRING SALVATION AND A WHOLENESS TO THIS INNER LIFE,
TO MY MIND.
I TELL YOU WHAT, MY MIND HAS BEEN SAVED.
NOT JUST MY SPIRIT, MY MIND HAS BEEN SAVED.
WHEN THE BIBLE SAYS TO PUT ON THE HELMET OF SALVATION IN
EPHESIANS 6 AS PART OF OUR WARFARE WITH THE ENEMY, YOU KNOW
WHAT THAT MEANS?
LEARN HOW TO THINK LIKE A PERSON THAT'S SAVED.
DON'T KEEP THINKING LIKE SOMEBODY WHO'S NOT SAVED.
THINK LIKE A PERSON THAT'S SAVED.
AND THEN YOU DON'T HAVE TO BELIEVE EVERY LIE OF THE ENEMY.
MY FEELINGS HAVE BEEN SAVED AND ARE IN THE PROCESS OF
BEING SAVED.
BUT I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, I SURE DON'T LIVE BY MY FEELINGS
ANYMORE, NOTHING LIKE WHAT I USED TO A LONG TIME AGO.
AND EVEN MY WILL HAS BEEN SAVED, NOT JUST MY SPIRIT, BUT MY MIND,
MY WILL, MY EMOTIONS.
AND I NO LONGER HAVE TO DO JUST WHAT I WANT TO DO
BECAUSE I WANT TO DO IT.
AND I DON'T HAVE TO GET ANGRY ANYMORE IF I DON'T GET WHAT
I WANT.
BUT I CAN ACTUALLY NOW WANT WHAT GOD WANTS MORE THAN I WANT WHAT
I WANT IN MY LIFE.
THAT IS WHOLENESS AND REAL SALVATION.
GINGER: YOU MAY OR MAY NOT BE FAMILIAR WITH RUTH GRAHAM, BUT I
BET YOU KNOW HER FATHER, EVANGELIST BILLY GRAHAM.
RUTH GREW UP IN AN AMAZING FAMILY, BUT THE EXPECTATIONS
THAT OTHER PEOPLE PUT ON HER, PEOPLE OUTSIDE THAT FAMILY, GAVE
HER SOME VERY DIFFICULT CIRCUMSTANCES IN HER LIFE.
AND SITTING DOWN AND TALKING WITH HER ABOUT IT WAS
A PLEASURE.
I THINK YOU'LL ENJOY HER.
[MUSIC]
GINGER: IT'S SO VALUABLE TO UNDERSTAND THAT EXPECTATIONS DO
NOT ALWAYS COME FROM WHERE WE EXPECT.
IT WASN'T NECESSARILY YOUR PARENTS WHO PUT THOSE REALLY
DIFFICULT EXPECTATIONS ON YOU.
FOR YOU IT WAS OTHER PEOPLE, IS THAT RIGHT?
RUTH: THAT'S RIGHT.
MOTHER AND DADDY WERE VERY CAREFUL NOT TO PUT EXPECTATIONS
ON US BECAUSE THEY KNEW THAT THE WORLD WOULD, BUT THEY PUT
EXPECTATIONS THAT WE WERE GOD'S CHILDREN AND WE WERE
REPRESENTING JESUS CHRIST, AND SO--
GINGER: WHICH IS SO IMPORTANT RIGHT THERE, YEAH.
RUTH: THAT'S RIGHT.
AND THAT'S THE--THOSE ARE THE EXPECTATIONS YOU WANT TO PUT ON
CHILDREN, THAT THEY BELONG TO JESUS AND THEY REPRESENT HIM.
BUT THEY DID NOT SAY, "YOU'RE BILLY GRAHAM'S CHILDREN," OR YOU
KNOW, "YOU GOT BEHAVE A CERTAIN WAY, YOU GOT TO DRESS A CERTAIN
WAY."
THAT WAS NOT THE CASE AT ALL.
AND WE LIVED IN A VERY SMALL COMMUNITY THAT WAS POPULATED AT
THAT TIME BY RETIRED MISSIONARIES AND RETIRED
PASTORS.
SO, THEY KNEW THE PRESSURES OF FAMILY, AND THEY ALSO KNEW WHAT
IT WAS LIKE TO TRAVEL AND LEAVE FAMILY.
SO, WE WERE REALLY IN A SPECIAL AREA WHERE PEOPLE KNEW WHAT WE
WERE--WHAT WE WERE BEING RAISED IN, BUT THEY DIDN'T PUT
EXPECTATIONS ON US.
AND THAT WAS WONDERFUL, BUT THEN WHEN I WENT TO BOARDING SCHOOL,
MY MOTHER THOUGHT FOR US--'CAUSE SHE WAS SENT AWAY TO
BOARDING SCHOOL.
SHE WAS A MISSIONARY'S DAUGHTER IN CHINA.
AND SO, SHE THOUGHT THAT THE BEST EDUCATION WOULD BE
AT A BOARDING SCHOOL.
SO, WHEN I ARRIVED AT THE BOARDING SCHOOL, EVERYBODY KNEW
I WAS BILLY GRAHAM'S DAUGHTER, AND THEY ALL THOUGHT I'LL BE
SUPER SPIRITUAL, OR KNOW MORE BIBLE, OR KNOW MORE HYMNS.
AND SO, YOU TRY TO MEET THOSE EXPECTATIONS, AND YOU'RE NEVER
ABLE TO BE YOURSELF.
GINGER: YEAH, THAT'S REALLY THE KEY, ISN'T IT?
BECAUSE WHEN YOU FIND THAT PEOPLE ARE EXPECTING THINGS OF
YOU THAT YOU CAN'T MATCH, OFTEN WE TRY TO MAKE THEM THINK THAT
WE CAN, YOU KNOW?
TRYING TO-- RUTH: TO PRETEND.
GINGER: TO HIDE WHO WE REALLY ARE.
SO, HOW DID THAT IMPACT WHO YOU WERE AND HOW YOU SAW YOURSELF?
RUTH: WELL, I PRETENDED.
I HAD TO PLAY CATCH-UP, YOU KNOW, I WAS ALWAYS TRYING TO BE
WHAT THEY THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO BE, AND EVEN IN COLLEGE.
AND SO, I GOT THERE AND EVERYBODY ON CAMPUS KNEW I WAS
BILLY GRAHAM'S DAUGHTER, AND I HAD TO--I WAS DOING TWO YEARS
IN ONE.
I HAD TO DO MY SENIOR YEAR IN HIGH SCHOOL AND MY FRESHMAN YEAR
IN COLLEGE AT THE SAME TIME, AND I WAS STUDYING LIKE MAD.
I WAS UP IN MY ROOM JUST REALLY HITTING THE BOOKS.
EVERYBODY THOUGHT I WAS UPSTAIRS PRAYING AND MEDITATING.
THEY THOUGHT I WAS THE SUPER SPIRITUAL PERSON.
WELL, THE BOYS STAYED AWAY FROM ME IN DROVES, SO IT WAS A REALLY
DOWNSIDE TO THAT.
BUT I, AGAIN, TRIED TO MEET EXPECTATIONS.
AND MY PROFESSORS WOULD CALL ON ME, "MS. GRAHAM,
YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT."
WELL, I DIDN'T KNOW THE ANSWER, AND IT WAS UNFAIR.
IT WAS REALLY HARD TO DO.
AND ALL ALONG, I NEVER WAS ABLE TO OWN UP TO,
"I DON'T KNOW THIS."
YOU KNOW, I DIDN'T WANT TO FAIL.
IT WASN'T UNTIL YEARS LATER WHEN I DID FAIL AND I REALIZED I
HAVEN'T MET EXPECTATIONS THAT I THOUGHT, "YOU KNOW, I HAVE
AN AUDIENCE OF ONE, AND THAT'S THE ONLY PERSON THAT MATTERS."
AND SO THAT'S REALLY--AND LATER IN LIFE, THAT'S WHAT I CAME TO.
GINGER: WHAT WAS THAT BREAKING POINT?
BECAUSE THAT WAS MORE AS AN ADULT, CORRECT?
RUTH: YES, I WAS DEFINITELY AN ADULT.
IT WAS AFTER MY FIRST DIVORCE.
AND I WAS--I REALIZED THAT THAT TIME BACK IN THE EARLY '90S,
LATE '80S, EARLY '90S, IN THE CHRISTIAN WORLD,
YOU JUST DIDN'T GET DIVORCED.
AND I WAS, MATTER OF FACT, TOLD TO BUILD AN EXTRA BEDROOM ON MY
HOUSE AND JUST LET HIM LIVE THERE SO IT WOULD LOOK NICE.
AND I SAID, "NO, THAT'S NOT HONEST."
AND I HAD TO BE HONEST, AND I BEGAN TO BECOME HONEST TO SAY,
"NO, I'M NOT THIS WAY.
I'VE GOT TO DO THIS.
I'VE GOT TO DO--I'VE GOT TO DO WHAT GOD'S CALLED ME TO DO."
AND, BUT IT WAS NOT EASY.
AND SO I JUST SAID, "NO, I'M JUST NOT GOING TO DO THAT."
AND I BECAME AWARE IN A NEW WAY OF GOD'S TOTAL LOVE
AND ACCEPTANCE OF ME.
YES, MY HUSBAND HAD BEEN UNFAITHFUL, AND THAT WAS VERY
DIFFICULT ON ITS OWN SELF, BUT--AND WE TRIED TO MAKE IT
WORK, BUT IT DIDN'T.
AND SO, WE DIVORCED AFTER 21 YEARS.
AND I DIDN'T KNOW WHO I WAS, OR WHAT I WAS ABOUT, OR ANYTHING.
BUT I MARRIED QUICKLY IN A REBOUND MARRIAGE, AND THAT
LASTED FOR ABOUT 3 MONTHS, AND HE DIVORCED ME.
AND I THOUGHT, "I HAVE REALLY BLOWN THIS."
YOU KNOW, MY PARENTS HAD SAID, "DON'T DO THIS.
WHY DON'T YOU WAIT?
SLOW DOWN."
BUT I WAS BOUND AND DETERMINED THAT I NEEDED TO BE, YOU KNOW,
TAKEN CARE OF, AND THAT I COULDN'T TAKE CARE OF MYSELF
BECAUSE I'D ALWAYS HAD SOMEBODY TAKING CARE OF ME.
AND FINALLY I REALIZED REALLY WITHIN 24 HOURS THAT I MADE
A TERRIBLE MISTAKE.
GINGER: WELL, HERE'S THE HARD THING IS WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES,
AND THEN WE ALL HAVE TO FACE HOW DO WE MOVE FORWARD?
WHAT DO WE DO IN THE FACE OF THOSE MISTAKES?
WHAT HAPPENED WHEN YOU TOOK THAT TO YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR FATHER?
RUTH: WELL, I HAD TO GO SEE THEM.
IT WAS A 2-DAY DRIVE, AND FEARS MULTIPLIED WITH EVERY MILE, AND
QUESTIONS SWIRLED IN MY MIND.
WHAT WERE THEY GOING TO SAY TO ME?
WHAT WAS I GOING TO SAY TO THEM?
WHAT ABOUT MY CHILDREN?
IF I HAD MADE SUCH A TERRIBLE MISTAKE, HOW COULD I EVER TRUST
MYSELF AGAIN?
I WAS JUST MISERABLE.
AND MY PARENTS LIVE ON THE SIDE OF A MOUNTAIN, AND I WOUND MY
CAR UP THE SIDE OF THE MOUNTAIN.
AND AS I PULLED IN THE PLACE TO PARK THE CAR, MY FATHER
WAS STANDING THERE.
AND WHEN I GOT OUT OF THE CAR, HE WRAPPED HIS ARMS AROUND ME
AND HE SAID, "WELCOME HOME."
THAT CHANGED MY LIFE.
THAT CHANGED MY LIFE.
AND THE GRACE THAT HE SHOWED AND THE FORGIVENESS WAS JUST SO
COMPLETE.
AND I HAD ALWAYS KNOWN THAT MY FATHER LOVED ME, THAT WAS NOT
AN ISSUE.
BUT THAT WAS JUST SO EVIDENT TO ME THAT HE WAS GIVING HIS
DAUGHTER GRACE.
AND I HAD BLOWN IT, HE COULD'VE SAID, "WHY DID YOU DO THIS?"
NONE OF THAT.
HE WAS JUST SO LOVING AND KIND.
AND SO I, AT THAT POINT, REALIZED THAT I WANTED TO PASS
THAT GRACE ON TO OTHER PEOPLE.
YOU KNOW, THAT GOD HAD CALLED ME TO PASS THAT GRACE ON TO OTHER
WOUNDED PEOPLE.
AND SO, THAT'S WHAT I'M HAPPY TO DO.
GINGER: SO, THOSE EXPECTATIONS WERE PROVEN TO BE
VERY DIFFERENT.
HE DIDN'T PUT THAT GUILT ON YOU.
DID THAT HELP LIFT THE GUILT FROM YOURSELF AT THE SAME TIME?
RUTH: NOT AT THAT TIME.
I MEAN, I FELT WELCOMED AND, YOU KNOW, EMBRACED, BUT IT
WASN'T UNTIL LATER WHEN I WAS IN CHURCH.
AND I REALIZED THAT I NEEDED TO GO AND TO GET RIGHT WITH GOD.
AND I WAS--BUT I WAS AFRAID BECAUSE I WAS BILLY GRAHAM'S
DAUGHTER, AND EVERYBODY WOULD SEE ME, AND THEY'D THINK
SOMETHING WAS WRONG.
GINGER: HOW MANY TIMES HAVE WE ALL FELT LIKE THAT?
I CAN'T GO FORWARD IN CHURCH BECAUSE WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO
THINK I'M PRAYING ABOUT, YOU KNOW?
RUTH: THAT'S RIGHT.
SO, BUT I DID, I STEPPED OUT AND I WENT FORWARD, AND I WAS
THE ONLY ONE THAT WENT FORWARD.
THEY ALL SAW ME.
AND AT THAT POINT, I DIDN'T CARE.
BUT IT WAS A TIME FOR ME TO JUST HIT BOTTOM AND SAY,
"GOD, YOU TAKE THIS MESS."
AND HE DID.
IT WAS LIKE HE WAS LIFTING EVERYTHING OFF OF MY SHOULDERS
BIT BY BIT, THE GUILT, THE SHAME, THE HURT.
AND THAT CHANGED MY LIFE TOO.
YOU KNOW, IT WAS A COMBINATION OF MY FATHER'S GRACE, BUT THEN
MY HEAVENLY FATHER'S GRACE.
AND LATER, I'D HAVE TO SHOW MY CHILDREN GRACE, SO.
GINGER: SO, WHAT WOULD YOU SAY TO SOMEONE WATCHING RIGHT
NOW WHO HAS FELT THE WEIGHT OF EXPECTATIONS IN THEIR LIFE?
NO MATTER WHO PUT THOSE EXPECTATIONS ON THEM, THEY FELT
THAT WEIGHT AS YOU HAVE.
HOW WOULD YOU TALK TO THEM ABOUT LETTING THOSE GO AND BEING
AUTHENTIC?
RUTH: WELL, FOR ME, IT WAS COMING TO UNDERSTAND WHO I WAS
IN CHRIST.
AND MY SCREENSAVER ON MY COMPUTER LISTS, "YOU BELONG.
YOU ARE LOVED.
YOU ARE VALUED."
BECAUSE WE HAVE TO RENEW OUR MINDS.
YOU KNOW, THE BIBLE SAYS TAKE EVERY THOUGHT CAPTIVE TO
THE OBEDIENCE OF CHRIST, AND WE DO.
AND THAT'S A BATTLE.
YOU HAVE TO TAKE EVERY THOUGHT CAPTIVE 'CAUSE THE ENEMY, WE
HAVE AN ENEMY, AND HE IS ALWAYS PLANTING THOUGHTS IN OUR MINDS.
"YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH.
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING.
YOU DIDN'T DO THAT RIGHT.
YOU BLEW IT.
WHY'D YOU DO IT THAT WAY?" WE HAVE TO COUNTERACT THAT WITH
THE SCRIPTURES, THE TRUTH OF GOD'S WORD, AND DO IT OVER,
AND OVER, AND OVER AGAIN.
AND LIKE I SAID, IT'S A BATTLE AND IT'S A PROCESS, AND I DON'T
THINK WE EVER ARRIVE UNTIL WE GET TO HEAVEN.
AND THEN WE WILL HAVE, YOU KNOW, THE LORD WELCOME US,
AND THAT WILL BE SO EXCITING.
BUT I THINK IT'S RENEWING YOUR MIND.
DOING THINGS THAT ARE HEALTHY FOR YOURSELF.
AND REMEMBERING YOU HAVE AN AUDIENCE OF ONE.
DON'T TRY TO PLEASE--YOU CAN'T PLEASE EVERYBODY.
IT JUST DOESN'T WORK, YOU'LL WEAR YOURSELF OUT.
AND JUST GET IN THE SCRIPTURES.
AND MY MOTHER GAVE ME A GREAT EXAMPLE, SHE ALWAYS HAD HER
BIBLE OPEN ON HER DESK.
AND SO, DURING THE DAY, SHE WOULD RUN BACK TO THE BIBLE,
JUST MAYBE IT WAS A WORD, MAYBE IT WAS A PHRASE, BUT SHE
SATURATED HERSELF IN THE SCRIPTURES.
GINGER: YEAH.
THAT'S LIFE-CHANGING TO YOU, ISN'T IT?
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
THAT IS JUST VERY ENCOURAGING FOR ALL OF US TO UNDERSTAND THAT
OUR HEAVENLY FATHER ISN'T LOOKING DOWN AND SHAKING HIS
HEAD AND SAYING, "YOU'VE LET ME DOWN.
THIS IS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED."
BECAUSE HE KNEW ALL ALONG WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN IN OUR
LIVES, AND HE NEVER STOPS LOVING US.
RUTH: THAT'S RIGHT, THAT'S RIGHT.
HE'S ALL LOVE, TOTAL LOVE.
GINGER: WELL, RUTH IS GOING TO BE JOINING US AT
WOMEN'S CONFERENCE THIS YEAR.
CANNOT WAIT, SO EXCITED.
YOU MADE ME CRY TODAY.
SO, WE'LL--WELL, I'M SURE IT'LL BE A LOT OF LAUGHTER,
A LOT OF TEARS.
IT'LL BE A WONDERFUL WEEKEND FOR ALL OF YOU LADIES WHO ATTEND.
SO, WE CAN'T WAIT TO HAVE YOU THERE.
RUTH: THANK YOU, I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.
GINGER: WELL, WE HOPE YOU'RE LOOKING FORWARD TO IT TOO.
YOU CAN GO ONLINE AND YOU CAN STILL REGISTER.
IT IS NOT TOO LATE.
MAKE PLANS TO BE THERE WITH US.
GINGER: YOU KNOW, REFLECTING ON RUTH'S STORY, IT IS SO
WONDERFUL TO REALLY GRASP HOW MUCH OF A LOVING FATHER GOD IS.
HE LOVES YOU LIKE NONE OTHER.
HE KNOWS ALL OF YOUR DEEPEST, DARKEST SECRETS AND FAILURES,
AND YET THAT LOVE NEVER CHANGES.
AND HE IS WAITING TO EMBRACE YOU, JUST LIKE REVEREND GRAHAM
WAS THERE FOR HIS DAUGHTER.
YOU KNOW, COMING UP, JOYCE IS GOING TO ASK THAT ALL IMPORTANT
QUESTION, HOW DO I GET MERCY?
BUT FIRST, LET'S LISTEN TO YOUR VOICE.
GINGER: IT'S SO FUN HEARING BACK AND FORTH FROM ALL OF YOU
OUT THERE.
WE'RE SO GLAD THAT YOU'RE A PART OF THE SHOW IN THAT WAY.
AND A FEW EPISODES AGO, WE ASKED YOU TO TELL US ABOUT A HABIT
THAT YOU REALLY WANT TO BREAK, AND HERE ARE SOME OF YOUR
RESPONSES.
THESE ACTUALLY COME FROM INSTAGRAM.
MS. DEBRA SAYS, "CURRENTLY, I HAVE A NASTY HABIT OF
TALKING TOO MUCH.
I HAVE AN EXTREMELY SHARP MOUTH THAT INSULTS AND CLAPS BACK
AT PEOPLE A LOT.
I'LL BE SO GRATEFUL TO BREAK FREE FROM THIS HABIT."
WELL, MS. DEBRA, WE HOPE THAT'S GOING WELL FOR YOU.
THAT'S A HARD ONE FOR ALL OF US.
HERE'S ANOTHER ONE THAT SAYS, "I HAVE THE HABIT OF PUTTING
IMPORTANT DECISIONS OFF IN FEAR OF MAKING THE WRONG DECISION."
THAT'S ANOTHER GOOD ONE TO WORK ON.
AND LET'S DO ONE MORE HERE.
"I BRING ALL MEDIA DEVICES WITH ME AROUND THE HOUSE.
IT'S LIGHT AND HANDY FOR BIBLE READING, BUT THAT'S ONE OF THE
SIX THINGS THAT I USE THEM FOR.
I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE MORE CONTROL IN THE LENGTH OF TIME
I USE THE MEDIA DEVICES AND USE THEM FOR BETTER PURPOSES."
WHO DOES NOT HAVE THAT CHAIN TO YOUR MEDIA DEVICE, WHETHER IT'S
YOUR PHONE, OR YOUR LAPTOP, OR WHATEVER?
SO, I KNOW THAT'S A BIG PROBLEM FOR A LOT OF US.
BUT THOSE HABITS CAN CHANGE.
AND WE LEARNED WHEN WE TALKED ABOUT THIS BEFORE THAT REPLACING
OUR BAD HABITS WITH GOOD HABITS ARE THE KEY, SO DON'T GIVE UP.
TODAY, IF YOU CONNECTED WITH WHAT OUR FRIEND RUTH WAS SAYING,
LET US KNOW HOW HAVE OTHER PEOPLE'S EXPECTATIONS IMPACTED
YOUR LIFE.
YOU CAN DO IT ON SOCIAL MEDIA, PICK YOUR FAVORITE.
INSTAGRAM, TWITTER, #EA, OUR FACEBOOK PAGE.
AND OUR FINAL QUESTION TODAY THAT JOYCE IS GOING TO ANSWER,
IT'S WHAT WE'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT ALL ALONG,
IS HOW DO I GET MERCY?
LET'S DISCOVER THE ANSWER TOGETHER RIGHT NOW.
JOYCE: GOD IS MERCIFUL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO GIVE YOU
ANY MORE SCRIPTURES ON THAT.
THERE'S HUNDREDS OF THEM IN THE BIBLE.
IF YOU WANT TO READ ANY MORE, JUST READ PSALMS,
GOD IS MERCIFUL.
BUT WE HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO RECEIVE GOD'S MERCY.
AND I CAN STAND HERE AND TALK ABOUT THIS FOR A LONG TIME
BECAUSE THERE ARE PEOPLE EVEN IN THIS PLACE TONIGHT, EVEN THOUGH
YOU BELIEVE GOD IS MERCIFUL AND YOU BELIEVE THAT GOD GIVES MERCY
TO PEOPLE, YOU REALLY HAVE NOT YET RECEIVED GOD'S MERCY
FOR YOURSELF.
GOD GIVES IT, WE RECEIVE IT, WE LET IT HEAL US, THEN IT CAN
FLOW THROUGH US.
BUT JUST TO SAY GOD IS MERCIFUL ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH.
NOW, LET'S TALK ABOUT TWO WORDS, THE WORD "GET" AND THE WORD
"RECEIVE."
WE GET MIXED UP.
GOD NEVER TELLS US TO GET ANYTHING.
YOU CANNOT FIND A SCRIPTURE THAT TALKS ABOUT ONE OF THE PROMISES
OF GOD THAT SAYS, "GO GET THAT PROMISE."
IT EITHER SAYS YOU'VE GOT IT, YOU HAVE IT, YOU ARE REDEEMED,
YOU HAVE BEEN SANCTIFIED.
AND SO, GOD WANTS US TO BELIEVE WE ALREADY HAVE IT, OR HE WANTS
US TO RECEIVE IT BY FAITH.
WE SAY THINGS LIKE THIS, "DID YOU GET SAVED?"
BUT THE BIBLE SAYS, "TO AS MANY AS RECEIVED HIM BECAME--HE GAVE
HIM POWER TO BECOME THE SONS OF GOD."
PAUL SAID TO THE CORINTHIANS, "HAVE YOU RECEIVED
THE HOLY SPIRIT?" WE RECEIVE FROM GOD.
YOU SAY, "WELL, JOYCE, WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?"
WELL, HERE'S THE BIG DEAL.
THE WORD "GET," IF YOU LOOK IT UP IN A DICTIONARY, MEANS TO
OBTAIN BY STRUGGLE AND EFFORT.
YOU CAN'T GET GOD'S MERCY.
YOU CAN'T BUY GOD'S MERCY.
THE ONLY THING YOU CAN DO IS RECEIVE IT.
TO RECEIVE MEANS TO OPEN UP AND, AS A RECEPTACLE, TO TAKE IN
WHAT'S BEING OFFERED.
WOW.
WELL, GOD, I MESSED UP AGAIN.
I REPENT, LORD, I TURN AWAY FROM IT.
I DON'T WANT TO ACT LIKE THAT, I'M SO SORRY.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR FORGIVENESS.
I RECEIVE YOUR MERCY.
I THINK THAT WE NEED TO TAKE A LITTLE MORE TIME RECEIVING
WHEN WE PRAY.
WE GO, "OH, GOD FORGIVE ME, GOD FORGIVE ME.
OH GOD, FORGIVE ME, FORGIVE ME, FORGIVE ME."
BUT WE NEVER TAKE THE TIME--VERY OFTEN WE DON'T TAKE THE TIME
TO JUST STOP, JUST TAKE EVEN 30 SECONDS AND JUST SIT QUIETLY
IN THE PRESENCE OF GOD, AND JUST BELIEVE I AM RECEIVING THAT
FORGIVENESS NOW.
MY SIN IS WASHED AWAY.
GOD IS GIVING ME MERCY.
YOU GOT TO RECEIVE THE MERCY OF GOD.
WHEN MERCY IS EXTENDED TO YOU, DO YOU RECEIVE IT, OR ARE YOU
STILL KIND OF MAD AT YOURSELF?
IT'S OFTEN DIFFICULT TO JUST RECEIVE MERCY BECAUSE WE TRY TO
DESERVE IT, AND YOU CAN'T DESERVE IT.
IT'S AN UNREASONABLE, RADICAL, RIDICULOUS GIFT THAT NOBODY CAN
MAKE ANY SENSE OUT OF.
AND THERE'S ONLY ONE THING THAT YOU CAN DO, AND THAT'S
RECEIVE IT.
THERE ARE PEOPLE IN HERE TONIGHT THAT YOU NEED--YOU NEED TO LEAVE
THIS PLACE, AND YOU NEED TO GO HOME, AND YOU NEED TO TAKE
SOME TIME RECEIVING.
COME ON, IT'LL CHANGE YOUR LIFE.
GINGER: WELL, UNDOUBTEDLY EVERY ONE OF US NEEDS MERCY.
WE DESPERATELY NEED MERCY.
BUT TOO OFTEN, WE FEEL LIKE WE JUST DON'T DESERVE IT, OR
THERE'S SOMETHING BETWEEN US AND THAT MERCY.
BUT WHAT WE'VE LEARNED TODAY IS THAT MERCY IS AN UNREASONABLE,
RADICAL GIFT.
IT'S SOMETHING THAT WE CAN'T INTELLECTUALIZE OR FIGURE
IT OUT.
WE JUST HAVE TO RECEIVE IT BECAUSE IT'S THERE FOR US.
WE WANT TO HELP YOU UNDERSTAND THAT, UNDERSTAND WHAT GOD
HAS FOR YOU.
SO, WE HAVE SOME RESOURCES FOR YOU TODAY THAT WILL BRING MERCY
ALIVE FOR YOU.
IT WILL HELP YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS ABOUT MERCY, WHAT
GOD WANTS TO DO IN YOUR LIFE, AND THE FREEDOM THAT HE WANTS
TO GIVE YOU THROUGH HIS MERCY.
THE FIRST ONE IS JOYCE'S BOOK "BEAUTY FOR ASHES."
THIS IS JOYCE'S STORY, AND IT IS A WONDERFUL BOOK THAT HAS HELPED
SO MANY PEOPLE ACCEPT THAT MERCY IN THEIR LIFE.
WHEN YOU READ HER STORY, YOU WILL SEE HOW, IN MANY, MANY
WAYS, IT IMPACTS YOURS BECAUSE IT'S TAKING GOD'S WORD AS IT
APPLIES TO HER LIFE, BUT YOU'RE THEN APPLYING IT TO YOURS.
AND AS WELL AS READING, WE HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU CALLED
"HEALING THE SOUL OF A WOMAN."
THIS IS A NEW RESOURCE FROM JOYCE, AND IT'S A GREAT ONE.
YOU WILL GET THIS ON DVD SO THAT YOU CAN WATCH IT, AS WELL AS ON
CD SO YOU CAN LISTEN TO IT WHEREVER YOU GO.
AND THIS IS TALKING ABOUT THOSE DEEP SOUL WOUNDS, THOSE THINGS
THAT MANY, MANY WOMEN FACE THAT WE JUST CAN'T HANDLE ON OUR OWN.
BUT GOD'S MERCY IS THERE FOR US TO GIVE US WHAT WE DON'T
DESERVE, AND TO KEEP US FROM THE PUNISHMENT THAT WE DO DESERVE.
THIS IS REALLY ALL ABOUT UNDERSTANDING THAT THERE IS
HEALING FOR YOUR LIFE.
JOIN US NEXT TIME ON "EVERYDAY ANSWERS" FOR THIS.
JOYCE: COME ON, I'M WANTING YOU TO GET AN ATTITUDE OF,
"OKAY, I'M JUST NOT GOING TO LAY DOWN AND JUST PUT UP WITH
THIS ANYMORE.
I'M GOING TO PRESS IN LIKE THE WOMAN WHO HAD
THE ISSUE OF BLOOD.
I'M GOING TO PRESS THROUGH THE CROWD, AND I'M GOING TO
TOUCH THE HEM OF HIS GARMENT, AND TRUST HIM FOR HEALING
AND WHOLENESS."
GINGER: SEND US YOUR QUESTIONS.
WE ARE TACKLING THEM ONE BY ONE, AND MAKING SOME REAL HEADWAY.
SO, IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO ASK ANYTHING AT ALL, YOU CAN GO TO
OUR EVERYDAY ANSWERS PAGE ON JOYCEMEYER.ORG AND SUBMIT YOUR
QUESTION THERE.
IF YOU DO IT ON SOCIAL MEDIA, USE #ASKJOYCE.
TODAY, JUST LIKE WE'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT, FREELY RECEIVE
THAT MERCY THAT GOD HAS FOR YOU.
AND SHOW SOME MERCY TO SOME OTHER PEOPLE AROUND YOU.
WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT TIME.
[MUSIC]
ANNOUNCER: THE PRECEDING PROGRAM WAS PAID FOR
BY THE FRIENDS AND PARTNERS OF JOYCE MEYER MINISTRIES.
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