Bullying: a phenomenon that has always existed,
but, especially in recent times, we talk a lot about this.
We want to give voice, and above all courage,
to those people who feel pressured by others,
those who are ridiculed, who feel helpless and powerless.
I have seen a video, that I wanna show you and explain
in which a "bullying operation" is simulated,
a continuous teasing towards a guy.
Have you seen?
Two ways of acting and two completely different opponent reactions
But... if someone teases you, tells you:
"You are ugly! You are fool!"
What do you do?
I turn around and leave
Really?
Why?
Because I have to ignore who teases me.
(Laugh)
It seems I told you what to say, ahah
I did not tell her anything, she's thinking alone.
But, it happened
that when you are in a group
sometimes you tease people.
I don't tease people
others do it
and I do not have to care about what others do.
But if you are in the group with them
you become guilty too.
If you are with the group that is doing bad things
ridicule someone, or ...
a vandalism act, for example breaking something at school
you know you're involved, you're guilty even if you were just looking.
I know, but I am telling you that I would never go in a silly group
I have understood
But in this situations I am guilty, you were meaning this.
Yes, and so, what would you do?
Well, if they fight
if they are fighting closer,
I take them away, I tell them "stop fight!"
I tell the teacher and then arrange things
an so they will understand
that they haven't to do these bad things.
Good! So you tell the teacher.
Yes, but not always, because in certain situations you can find a remedy alone
talking, communicating ..
-Yes! -Or calling an help.
These dominant people try to destroy others,
especially psychologically.
it's a continuous search for authority, right?
The one who must dominate on the other, like animals:
when the male Alpha is attacked by other males to dominate in turn.
If the one who is attacked responds with the same malice
and go out from his idea of "good person",
he goes down to his level,
and so wickedness leads to malice.
You know that if someone teases you
and you stay at his game "no, shut up, no, no no!"
that person enjoys for this.
He likes to make you angry.
And in that situation.. what do you have to do?
As I did with a friend that attracted my attention
he made fun of me,
I turned around and left with the others.
And he stopped?
in these cases you have to leave the person alone so he slowly calms down
and... you wait few days...
and then he asks you for forgiveness.
"Sorry for what I did"... and then we talk about it and we come back friends
'cause you make him think, practically
-yes . -Your indifference makes him think.
The more you get angry, the more they have fun
that's what they want, that's what they desire.
Make you angry...
...make you burning.. there is a wickedness at the base
But if the poor unfortunate was stronger?
I mean that he keeps his line of thought
being calm, not aggressive.
Maintaining a composed attitude,
not minding what the other person is saying,
you will arrive at this
Ok, maybe this example is a little bit far from the reality,
anyway if the bulled person
manages not to be subdued,
not to be too sensitive
to think that this is only a defense mechanism
of a person maybe weaker than him,
will reject the person's hatred.
As I told in an "only good vibes" episode
it is like a gift: when someone give you a gift, and you refuse it
the gift remains at that person.
The same thing is for badness and negativity:
if you do not accept it and reject it, it remains to that person,
and you protect yourself
The aggressive people that attack you,
feeling that you, helpless creature (as they call you), don't care about it
of what they are saying,
they feel disappointed, they no longer feel pleasure and leave you alone.
I experienced this in first person when I was a child
I will always remember and I always tell to my kids.
It's a small thing, if I think about it now, but it annoyed me and I suffered.
They called me with a bad nickname
and.. I'll always remember that my mother said:
"Don't care, don't give importance, they will stop"
And so it was.
I have not looked after them
the more I said "No, stop it!" and more they insisted.
The important thing is to not care of what they say
DON'T CARE, it is more important,
because they are playing a game,
sometimes dangerous,
you don't have to make them win, you don't get hurt by them
hurt your feelings
this is the important thing.
They do not have to verbally attack you,
but it is obvious that if someone puts his hands on you....
...
When it comes to violence it is no longer bullying, it is physical violence. ok?
The bullying to which I refer is verbal,
the classic "teasing" that hurts.
If they say you do not have to talk because otherwise....
... and they threaten you
In the same moment when yo talk about this with someone,
with a parent or with an authority
you are already safe.
Just TALKING with someone,
bring out the negative feelings and fear,
it means to be saved.
if someone beats is a violence, it is not bullying, it is real crime.
and if one perceives that life is in danger because someone threatens
in that case we must protect ourselves.
I think that talking with someone it's always a positive thing,
it is good to externalize.
Do not be afraid, of nothing,
because sometimes certain phenomena are bigger than us.
Indifference kills, so if you want to remove someone who is bothering you, you must be indifferent.
Stay taller than the wickedness and brutality that always resides at low levels.
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