Alina: Hello guys! This is Heads and Tails!
Kolya: We just landed on one of the largest islands in the world.
Alina: The Island of Borneo!
Kolya: That is terrific! This place is so cool and diverse! Juicy and colorful!
I think it will not matter if you will be poor.
Heads.
Alina: Tails!
Alina: Open up!
Alina: I dropped the glasses and it brought me luck.
Alina: Have a great time walking around.
Borneo is the third largest island in the world and the biggest one in Asia.
Three countries are sharing the territory of that island – Indonesia, Malaysia and Brunei.
This is where we arrived, the Malaysian part. We want to snorkel in two seas!
Get a tan at popular resorts!
Look at the unique animals that you cannot find anywhere else on the planet.
We will have a long and very unusual weekend.
First things first, I have to exchange my $100. So nice in here. They have A/C!
All right, the currency exchange.
It turns out that Sandakan airport does not have an exchange spot.
This regional airport does not take international flights. Each tourist gets here with multiple connections and exchanges money on the way.
Looks like I will not be riding that bus.
Making a deal with a cabbie is my only option. I need him to take me to an exchange spot.
I could have taken a bus to the city, but the problem is that I have no local loot and they would not go for it.
The absence of an air conditioner is another downer. You cannot control it even if you get it on the bus.
Here I can direct the flow and set my favorite temperature. Terrific.
I asked the producers for the best car imaginable for my weekend.
Well, hello the most expensive rental car!
It might be ten years older than I am!
A 2008 Nissan X-Trail?
2.5-liter engine, 160 horsepowers and a maximum speed of 180 kms per hour.
The body looks rusty too. It has definitely seen a lot in its heyday.
Looks hella old and scruffy.
On the other hand, the experience is a good thing.
I love the fact that it's an S.U.V. Borneo is covered with jungle and mountain serpentine roads, so this type of car is a perfect fit.
I exchanged money and paid the cabbie. It is about time I got to know this city.
At first glance, Sandakan looks like a decoration for an Asian action flick.
The houses burnt by the sun and the winding streets of the dirty slums.
The city's port is the main source of local income. So is the textile production.
A seamstress is a common profession among Asian men. Pedal to the metal and destroy!
The locals are without a doubt the main highlight of Sandakan. Despite their terrible living conditions, they are famous for their friendliness and hospitality.
The city is quite dirty. The smells are everywhere. Yet the people are so friendly and sincere that the vibe that I got was solely positive.
This looks more like a village to be honest with you. Kinda boring.
Rich tourists who come to Sandakan do not stay here for long. They rent a car
and go across the island to reach a hip Kota Kinabalu resort.
This is where the azure waters of the South China Sea meet the most expensive hotels. This is where I will go.
People come to Sandakan to see its many National reserves where you can see some of the most unique animals.
This is what I will do this weekend.
I have to head towards the sea first though.
Borneo is a huge island covered with jungle and laced with a winding serpentine of roads.
The road to Kota Kinabalu is a remarkable sight.
The local grandeur is so striking that it makes me want to pull over
and marvel at the unbelievable landscapes of this island.
A few hours later,
made it to one of the most popular hotels in Kota Kinabalu – Sutera Harbor.
This is a huge complex equipped with swimming pools, a yacht club
with a private access to the clear South China Sea water.
Let us see what we have here. I rented out a nice compact modern suite.
Looks modest, but tasteful. It features a half of a bathtub.
A small plasma and a balcony. The best feature of this suite is the splendid panorama view that it provides.
The sea is all that you need.
There is no beach in Sandakan, but the sea is here for sure. That means that there should be cheap seafood somewhere.
The local market is the first place you should visit in case you are on a limited budget and feel an unlimited amount of hunger.
So awesome! Check it out!
They have everything here –
octopus,
blue crabs,
sharks
and stingrays.
They sell just about anything that lives in the sea, but I decided to go with a classic combo.
and some shrimp.
Fifty ringgit. Look what I got for just fifty ringgit.
A lobster and some tiger prawns! Awesome! All I need to do is find a place where I can prepare it.
They say that there is a joint on the second floor.
Go there?
All right.
Local markets always have a spot where you can get your food prepared.
This looks magnificent!
Let us try the lobster. Look at how meaty it is.
The lobster that I could afford on my budget is not large, but I'd rather have a small lobster in my mouth than dream about a big one that is at the bottom of the sea.
Despite the fact that butter just flows in their kitchen, this lobster tastes just like the one you would get in an expensive restaurant.
You cannot ruin a lobster with butter.
The seafood tastes great because it is freshly caught and was not frozen a few times over.
My lunch amounted to $13 and it was so filling that I probably will not want to eat dinner.
Wonerful. It tastes amazing and it is authentic. An unforgettable experience!
The beach is the foremost landmark of any resort. This is where I am heading.
It is about time we checked in at the beach.
What? Is that the whole beach? Are you for real?
I wanna go like.
What a bummer. There might not be enough space for you my love.
Let us check.
The length of my beach equals five unicorns. Sounds respectable. Five unicorns.
Where did you go on vacation? I chilled at the beach with five unicorns.
The contingent is comprised of Chinese folks and more Chinese folks. Those people there are not though.
The density – there is enough space for everyone, plenty of sunbeds.
A beach has to have sand! There are some seashell shreds here, feels good.
The infrastructure – the restrooms are located nearby. There is a spa, a café, two restaurants and everything else that your soul desires.
The cold water! This is divine.
Name a beach that has that. Great job!
The water is extremely clear but the bottom that I see perfectly is rocky. Not always a great thing.
On the other hand, I am at a beach by myself. My own little private beach. Keeping up with gold card traditions.
I give Sutera Harbor a steady three stars.
The waters of Sulu Sea surround Sandakan. All that I have to do is find a beach.
Definitely not it.
Here perhaps?
What is that all about?
As it turns out the local shores are drowning in garbage. The two key contributing factors are the activity at the port and the indifference of the locals.
Besides that, the coastline is crawling with iguanas.
There is no beach in the city where I can take a dip.
Rich Malaysians do not lounge at the beach or swim in the sea. They usually hit the waves on their jet skis.
I am about to do the same thing.
I want to do some rough riding!
This is not my first time riding a jet ski, but I still got a personal instructor. It's what rich people do.
Controlling a hydro bike is not that difficult. There are two handlebars, a start button,
and a lever for acceleration. It is not equipped with brakes at all. You need to use the water resistance for that.
The key thing to remember is not to release the gas lever during turns. Otherwise, you risk flipping over.
That is about it! You can cruise the sea surface for as long as your heart desires.
I love jet skis!
By now, you have probably realized that everything in Sandakan is very cheap. You cannot hide from the heat anywhere,
so I decided to rent a room in a hotel with a swimming pool.
A room in a four-star hotel is just $54! Fifty-four bucks for four stars! It is awesome in there! Follow me! I will show you!
Four Points hotel. Four stars. Equipped with a panoramic swimming pool of course. Check out that pool!
I do not regret renting this room for a second. Primarily because of this pool. Moreover, I have the whole city on the palm of my hand.
I came to the best Malaysian restaurant for a best possible acquaintance with a local cuisine.
t is called D' Place Kinabalu. They serve the best traditional dishes in town.
This is so interesting! What can be a traditional dish here? Probably some fish.
It turned out that the most traditional and popular dish on Borneo is…
Oh my God! What is that Misha? I do not want it!
Larvae of palm weevil! Yuk!
They live inside the palm tree trunks. Locals appreciate them for high nutritional value and low amount of calories.
I have live larvae on my plate! I cannot get my emotions under control because I have larvae moving around here
Oh my God! I can see it moving its antennas!
Waiter: Okay, show me your hand.
Alina: Why?
This so beyond me! I just cannot!
It is alive and cannot eat a living creature.
Larvae are served both alive and deep-fried.
Let me try the second option now. Perhaps it will not be as nauseating.
I cannot get it with a fork.
This is fried larva. This is the head that you cannot eat and the body.
Dear Lord! This is so sickening!
I thought I just saw it move when I looked at the cooked one.
All right! Let me drop the stalling act! Let us eat it and forget about it so we can get outta here.
I am eating a cooked larva. The day that I will remember forever.
I can do it and forget it ever happened.
Something leaked from inside the crust.
That stuff reminds of
some kind of a sauce.
I can taste the butter it was cooked in, an aftertaste of nut.
Also a hint of something milky.
That could be the butter. That could be how it actually tastes.
I want to forget this ever happened, please.
After snorkeling in the pool, I want to see where I will spend the night.
Let me show you my suite! Opulence! Luxury!
My suite is bigger and better that Alina's!
I have a plasma, a kettle,
a table where you can get some work done and a window remote.
The battery is dead.
My night will be as nice and comfy as if I had a gold card.
Sweet dreams.
I want to make a recording of the waves. I miss the sea so much when I return from vacation.
Good night. I hope you dream about the sea.
A typical morning of a rich person begins with relaxing in a huge private pool.
Backpackers begin their morning with breakfast since it is included in a fee.
What an abundance of riches! I am getting ready to fill up on that.
A breakfast buffet at Four Points hotel has a large variety of food you can choose from.
It makes no sense for me to describe my food, because you cannot ever find any fancy culinary at a buffet.
Quantity is their stronger side, so I got a lot of food.
Let me eat and we will begin a day full of adventures.
You're not Indiana Jones when you're hungry.
I already mentioned that there are many awesome National parks in Sandakan's vicinity.
I will visit all the cool ones. First on my list is Labuk Bay.
An entrance for foreigners costs almost $15, while it is only $4 for locals. I'm Malaysian child.
Am I a Malaysian child Dima?
Why you…
I know this is expensive, but what else am I gonna spend the money on here?
It looks like a regular reserve at first – palm trees and bushes. Although, as soon as you go further you realize what, or rather who makes this park so famous.
What's up guys!
Behold the rare proboscis monkeys that you can only see on Borneo!
These monkeys have a distinguishing large nose that looks like a cucumber.
Scientists still have not figured out why these monkeys need such a giant sniffer.
Some say that a large nose makes a male monkey appear more attractive to females.
Others believe that they use noses for communication – larger nose translates into a louder voice.
The monkeys keep this secret to themselves.
You are not allowed to touch or feed the animals in this park.
These are the endangered species and this law protects them.
This kinda sucks. I really want to pet them, because you do not see proboscis monkeys every day.
Was it worth coming here? Of course it was! Where else would you see endemic species up close in their natural habitat?
While Kolya is exploring the animal kingdom, I will descend to the one under water.
I can do it straight from my hotel, which is awesome
I rented a boat and hired experienced instructors. All decks ahoy!
The South China Sea is a true marvel for exploring the underwater life. It is seven times larger than the Black Sea that we are so used to.
An unbelievable amount of species inhabits this sea! The corals are countless!
Here is a green-and-yellow coral fan and a pattern of stony corals.
A whole family of polyps over there.
Packs of colorful fishes swim back and forth around that splendor – Indo-Pacific sergeant, clown fish, and even reef bannerfish.
Other rare underwater species include tridacna – gigantic shell-shaped Mollusca and a pack of sea urchins.
This creates a wonderful atmosphere of a huge underwater city where the action never stops and everyone is busy. This is a fairytale!
Unbelievable!
I came to another prominent National reserve – Gomantong caves.
I am at a park entrance. It features the nastiest cave in the world. How can a cave be disgusting?
There is only one way to find out – walk in there and check it out!
This is gross. The smell here is nasty and very thick. You could slice this air with a knife and make sandwiches for the people that you hate.
God almighty!
This is the most disgusting cave in the world. Locals believed that it was a gate to hell.
It really stinks in here. The stench is so foul that
I do not want to go in there. The further you go the worse the smell gets.
This really has to be the most disgusting cave in the world. A duty of a host obliges me to go inside and show you what is going on there.
I instantly became creeped out. The bottom of the cave is filled with tons of bird feces with the legions of gigantic cockroaches.
Dude check out these grouping roaches. Just like in the dorm. I am wearing open-toe shoes!
Will the light scare them off? It did! Yet now I get to see the whole picture! This brings me joy!
This is where the skylarks come to nest. They nest on the ceiling and
all poop falls on the floor. Natural processes take their course. This whole thing is brewing and smells of ammonia.
Cockroaches seem to love what the skylarks do. This place is crawling with roaches.
This cave is also unique because it developed its own ecosystem over a few thousand years.
One specie depends on another. The skylarks weave nests while the roaches feed on their poop.
The bats are eating the insects. While the rest is cleaned up by crabs.
Sometimes even a bat can get it.
Locals try to profit off this cave beyond charging for entry.
They do not want skylarks to go away because they collect the nests. Ladders and everything here.
They cut the nests off and sell them for good money to restaurants, pharmacies, etc.
Staying here for a long time is unbearable. The stench is very strong. My brain is cloudy and my speech is slurry. I have no idea what I am talking about.
There is a fallen skylark and it is still breathing! Skylarks have very short legs. Therefore, they cannot get back up from the ground.
If that bird can potentially fly, I can help it.
A skylark. Live and let live.
How are you? Easy! Easy now.
Get over here.
Terrific! I feel very accomplished.
Humans are twisted creatures. If you tell them that the place is nasty they would never go there,
but once you reveal that it is the nastiest place on the planet they are willing to pay to see it!
Exotic fruit. Azure seawater. Sandakan plays by its own set of rules.
Kolya: This city does not have beaches!
Sandakan is preparing a lot of surprises.
Alina: Oh my God! What it is Misha?
Kolya: Fifty-four bucks for four stars! It is awesome in there! Follow me! I will show you!
Kolya: People are sincerely glad to see you.
Alina: I think it is ten years older than I am.
Kolya: It really stinks here.
Alina: I will remember this day forever.
Kolya: I got the city on the palm of my hand.
Alina: The Sea is everything.
Kolya: Wow! Look who we got here!
Alina: Hello!
Kolya: I thought you would be coming down from a copter.
Alina: This was an interesting, but a very weird weekend. I cannot figure out whether I had a gold card or a backpack.
Kolya: Did you forget a PIN-code? You should have called me.
Alina: Very funny. My hotel was economy class. I had to travel a lot.
I expected a nice dinner and received shock therapy instead. I ate a larva, Yuk!
Although, there was good stuff too.
Kolya: You mean the crunchy bits?
Alina: I finally managed to conquer diving. I really enjoyed myself! My first time!
Kolya: Awesome. Mine was better.
Alina: Of course you did.
Kolya: I did not do a lot of stuff, but everything I did was amazing.
Alina: Such as?
Kolya: Such as visiting the nastiest cave in the world. Full of roaches, bats and the smell of ammonia.
Alina: Good thing that I was not there.
Kolya: I still got some on me. Wanna smell?
Alina: No.
Kolya: Okay. What else did I do? I went to a fish market and ate lobster.
Alina: A lobster?
Kolya: Yep.
Alina: How?
Kolya: I used my mouth.
Alina: Why didn't I get lobster?
Kolya: There are two theories. See you later friends!
Alina: Guys!
Kolya: Let's go. Well, your mouth was full of larvae.
Alina: Yuk! Let us not talk about it please. They were moving. So gross!
Kolya: That is what separating foods is. Larvae does not go with lobsters.
Alina: The waiter ate a live one right in front of me.
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